Comments on: Wack Bible Stories, by Ben White http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/ the internet literature magazine blog of the future Thu, 24 May 2012 09:44:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Justice Angelicus http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-80350 Justice Angelicus Tue, 29 Jun 2010 15:41:15 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-80350 The intent is painfully clear to a sober reader, yet has been taken out of context by many who want to accept their own readings. This is what is evil: God says 'It's your duty to give your brother's wife a male child to carry on their family, so for that very limited purpose you should sleep with her' Onan, being an incredible douche, takes to sleeping with his sister in law, but just for the sex. He doesn't impregnate her because he knows that if he does, he can't rightfully sleep with her anymore. This has nothing to do with masturbation (there is not one specific proscription in the bible about masturbation. The closest you can get are jewish laws about semen being unclean and the vague, proscriptions against "lusting" which one can argue is necessary for masturbation. The intent is painfully clear to a sober reader, yet has been taken out of context by many who want to accept their own readings.

This is what is evil: God says ‘It’s your duty to give your brother’s wife a male child to carry on their family, so for that very limited purpose you should sleep with her’

Onan, being an incredible douche, takes to sleeping with his sister in law, but just for the sex. He doesn’t impregnate her because he knows that if he does, he can’t rightfully sleep with her anymore.

This has nothing to do with masturbation (there is not one specific proscription in the bible about masturbation. The closest you can get are jewish laws about semen being unclean and the vague, proscriptions against “lusting” which one can argue is necessary for masturbation.

]]> By: Justice Angelicus http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-133568 Justice Angelicus Tue, 29 Jun 2010 15:41:00 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-133568 The intent is painfully clear to a sober reader, yet has been taken out of context by many who want to accept their own readings. This is what is evil: God says 'It's your duty to give your brother's wife a male child to carry on their family, so for that very limited purpose you should sleep with her' Onan, being an incredible douche, takes to sleeping with his sister in law, but just for the sex. He doesn't impregnate her because he knows that if he does, he can't rightfully sleep with her anymore. This has nothing to do with masturbation (there is not one specific proscription in the bible about masturbation. The closest you can get are jewish laws about semen being unclean and the vague, proscriptions against "lusting" which one can argue is necessary for masturbation. The intent is painfully clear to a sober reader, yet has been taken out of context by many who want to accept their own readings.

This is what is evil: God says ‘It’s your duty to give your brother’s wife a male child to carry on their family, so for that very limited purpose you should sleep with her’

Onan, being an incredible douche, takes to sleeping with his sister in law, but just for the sex. He doesn’t impregnate her because he knows that if he does, he can’t rightfully sleep with her anymore.

This has nothing to do with masturbation (there is not one specific proscription in the bible about masturbation. The closest you can get are jewish laws about semen being unclean and the vague, proscriptions against “lusting” which one can argue is necessary for masturbation.

]]> By: rachel a. http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-47463 rachel a. Wed, 06 Jan 2010 07:32:07 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-47463 I imagine they hate it due to they're seeing it as a catastrophic waste of socks. I imagine they hate it due to they’re seeing it as a catastrophic waste of socks.

]]> By: rachel a. http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-133567 rachel a. Wed, 06 Jan 2010 07:32:00 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-133567 I imagine they hate it due to they're seeing it as a catastrophic waste of socks. I imagine they hate it due to they’re seeing it as a catastrophic waste of socks.

]]> By: rachel a. http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-47462 rachel a. Wed, 06 Jan 2010 07:30:33 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-47462 Or eating your sesame bagel messily. Or eating your sesame bagel messily.

]]> By: rachel a. http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-133566 rachel a. Wed, 06 Jan 2010 07:30:00 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-133566 Or eating your sesame bagel messily. Or eating your sesame bagel messily.

]]> By: rachel a. http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-47461 rachel a. Wed, 06 Jan 2010 07:29:25 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-47461 This is probably me, but I dislike contemplating sex in the Bible. Getting that amount of freak on in the desert? Just the thought makes me chafe. This is probably me, but I dislike contemplating sex in the Bible. Getting that amount of freak on in the desert? Just the thought makes me chafe.

]]> By: rachel a. http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-133565 rachel a. Wed, 06 Jan 2010 07:29:00 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-133565 This is probably me, but I dislike contemplating sex in the Bible. Getting that amount of freak on in the desert? Just the thought makes me chafe. This is probably me, but I dislike contemplating sex in the Bible. Getting that amount of freak on in the desert? Just the thought makes me chafe.

]]> By: Ben White http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-47459 Ben White Wed, 06 Jan 2010 05:41:48 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-47459 There really aren't any in the Hebrew bible. This story is the main one cited. The other argument is just an extension of the "be fruitful and multiple" decree, the idea being that if your if you're busy jerking, you're not busy making babies. Historically, most rabbis/priests/etc have condemned the practice over time (presumably because it's naughty, and they're uptight), but the scriptural basis for it isn't particularly strong. There really aren’t any in the Hebrew bible. This story is the main one cited. The other argument is just an extension of the “be fruitful and multiple” decree, the idea being that if your if you’re busy jerking, you’re not busy making babies. Historically, most rabbis/priests/etc have condemned the practice over time (presumably because it’s naughty, and they’re uptight), but the scriptural basis for it isn’t particularly strong.

]]> By: Ben White http://htmlgiant.com/craft-notes/wack-bible-stories-by-ben-white/comment-page-1/#comment-133564 Ben White Wed, 06 Jan 2010 05:41:00 +0000 http://htmlgiant.com/?p=22794#comment-133564 There really aren't any in the Hebrew bible. This story is the main one cited. The other argument is just an extension of the "be fruitful and multiple" decree, the idea being that if your if you're busy jerking, you're not busy making babies. Historically, most rabbis/priests/etc have condemned the practice over time (presumably because it's naughty, and they're uptight), but the scriptural basis for it isn't particularly strong. There really aren’t any in the Hebrew bible. This story is the main one cited. The other argument is just an extension of the “be fruitful and multiple” decree, the idea being that if your if you’re busy jerking, you’re not busy making babies. Historically, most rabbis/priests/etc have condemned the practice over time (presumably because it’s naughty, and they’re uptight), but the scriptural basis for it isn’t particularly strong.

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