March 30th, 2010 / 8:33 am
Uncategorized

say my name, say my name

How do you know you are a literary magazine?

I can’t say your name.

The Collagist makes me think about psychics and those cold case TV shows everyone apparently adores.

Pleiades sounds like a big important word, a cocktail party sort of term, joined with Richard Wagner or whatnot, a god or a sculpture in an ornamental garden, so I usually let someone else say it first, and then I just do a little intellectual chuckle and repeat whatever they say.

Dogzplot looks like it’s hard to say but really isn’t.

I use to edit for Cella’s Round Trip and never was sure how to say Cella. I kept getting this image of a girl snagged in the rapids of a river, but I could never call out her name or yell her goodbye. I was going to tell the editor/founder they should pick another name, one everyone can pronounce, but that same day a young man plowed into my car and then the car was placed on a tow truck and yet another young man plowed into the car again (while it was being towed) so I never got around to it.

Aufgabe makes me feel like I have a mouthful of microwave popcorn.

One writer who uses Zoetrope’s workshop site recently told me she just learned–after years of use–to say the name aloud.

Lalitamba sounds like a fun though technically difficult dance, and maybe is one.

ZYZZYVA has that medication-by-Eli-Lilly feel.

Annalemma, you’re pushing it.

I suppose there are advantages and disadvantages. Does this make your magazine “arty”? Some people “get it” while others do not…Like with band names (Can you pronounce “!!!”? And did you know we are running out of band titles?). Are you hardcore if the only one correctly saying the name? But then a publisher or a magazine is not a band, and you want volume, I think, not just core fans. Or I suppose you want both.

An advantage might be the originality. The oddness. Does this make it memorable? Or actually more difficult to remember? Then again, if I really know the correct way to say your magazine’s name, I can throw it around with confidence, shutting down all the unlearned fools at a gathering with the hardwood floors and the cats.

And there’s your disadvantage. I’m human. Don’t want to be embarrassed by butchering a magazine’s name. So I WILL NOT SAY your name. How can I spread the word if I am apprehensive to utter your magazine’s title?

(I’m also sometimes scared to order sake. I once called Lyon, France “Lee-On” and I seriously once referred to Yosemite Street in Denver, Colorado as YO—SMITE [People in the car laughed at me]).

Can I spell what I can’t say? (Big problem with a search engine—no?)

I’m really not sure.

Your experience with unpronounceable names? Pros and cons?

Hmmm…

Dzanc you very much.

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

84 Comments

  1. Dinty

      Brevity — http://brevitymag.com — it is what it says, & it says what it is.

      PS – Yes. I’m the editor. Sue me.

  2. Dinty

      Brevity — http://brevitymag.com — it is what it says, & it says what it is.

      PS – Yes. I’m the editor. Sue me.

  3. Sommer B.

      How about lovely EOAGH? I think it takes the cake.

  4. Sommer B.

      How about lovely EOAGH? I think it takes the cake.

  5. Glen Binger

      HAHA great article! Good work, Sean.

  6. Glen Binger

      HAHA great article! Good work, Sean.

  7. Paul Siegell

      Sommer, seriously! I’ve been in that one and have NO IDEA how to pronounce it. Is it all a combined sound or are we supposed to run the letters?

  8. Paul Siegell

      Sommer, seriously! I’ve been in that one and have NO IDEA how to pronounce it. Is it all a combined sound or are we supposed to run the letters?

  9. mimi

      The artist formerly known as Prince (prints?)

      Fabularious photo. I’m chuckling.

      I love the word Pleiades. Isn’t that the group of stars that you have to look at sideways (ie. not straight on) in order to see? Which is a cool concept in and of itself.

      I used to say YOSE-eh-mite in my head when I was little but didn’t say it outloud to anyone – thus didn’t get laughed at. For a long time I wouldn’t say “Vegemite” (as in Vegemite sandwich) outloud because I didn’t know if it had 3 syllables or 4 (a la Yosemite). and how do you pronounce “Nutella”?

      A friend of mine, long time ago, during a middle school science class oral report, pronounced the word “epinephrine” ee-PINE-oh-FRINE and the class (OK, half the class, the smarty-nerds) cracked up.

      OK. I know other examples will be popping up in my head all day long. Thanks for that. Better grab a pad ‘n’ pencil.
      OK.

  10. mimi

      The artist formerly known as Prince (prints?)

      Fabularious photo. I’m chuckling.

      I love the word Pleiades. Isn’t that the group of stars that you have to look at sideways (ie. not straight on) in order to see? Which is a cool concept in and of itself.

      I used to say YOSE-eh-mite in my head when I was little but didn’t say it outloud to anyone – thus didn’t get laughed at. For a long time I wouldn’t say “Vegemite” (as in Vegemite sandwich) outloud because I didn’t know if it had 3 syllables or 4 (a la Yosemite). and how do you pronounce “Nutella”?

      A friend of mine, long time ago, during a middle school science class oral report, pronounced the word “epinephrine” ee-PINE-oh-FRINE and the class (OK, half the class, the smarty-nerds) cracked up.

      OK. I know other examples will be popping up in my head all day long. Thanks for that. Better grab a pad ‘n’ pencil.
      OK.

  11. chris

      Thanks for the link!

      Yeah, I get that a lot. The name is kinda fraught with difficulty.

      I took the name from a friend’s art gallery. We were going to start publishing companion books with the shows he was throwing. The gallery got shut down and I decided to keep the name. It was an arty choice to begin with and I often regret it when trying to spell it over the phone (“Alpha November November Alpha Lima Echo Montana” etc.). And it gets tiring explaining what it means: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Analemma. Not to mention I had to ad an “n” to the spelling so people would stop calling it “Anal-Emma”

      If I could do it al over again I’d be tempted to go with something monosyllabic and punchy. But the title has grown on me over the years. I appreciate the sound of the word (anne-ah-lehm-ah), the look of it, the symmerty of the letters grouped together. It’s become a very beautiful word to me. Which reflects the purpose of a literary magazine: to publsih beautiful words.

  12. chris

      Thanks for the link!

      Yeah, I get that a lot. The name is kinda fraught with difficulty.

      I took the name from a friend’s art gallery. We were going to start publishing companion books with the shows he was throwing. The gallery got shut down and I decided to keep the name. It was an arty choice to begin with and I often regret it when trying to spell it over the phone (“Alpha November November Alpha Lima Echo Montana” etc.). And it gets tiring explaining what it means: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Analemma. Not to mention I had to ad an “n” to the spelling so people would stop calling it “Anal-Emma”

      If I could do it al over again I’d be tempted to go with something monosyllabic and punchy. But the title has grown on me over the years. I appreciate the sound of the word (anne-ah-lehm-ah), the look of it, the symmerty of the letters grouped together. It’s become a very beautiful word to me. Which reflects the purpose of a literary magazine: to publsih beautiful words.

  13. dave e

      When I edited for Dogzplot I was surprised how many submitters addressed their subs to dogplotz

  14. dave e

      When I edited for Dogzplot I was surprised how many submitters addressed their subs to dogplotz

  15. dave e

      I had a story published in “Calliope” and was blathering about it to a smarter friend who said it’s not “Calley-ope” you fucking loser

  16. dave e

      I had a story published in “Calliope” and was blathering about it to a smarter friend who said it’s not “Calley-ope” you fucking loser

  17. Sean

      Oh man Calliope is a great example.

  18. Sean

      Oh man Calliope is a great example.

  19. dave e

      It was fun, after that conversation, to wiki “Calliope” and learn she was the muse of heroic poetry. I’m sure I knew who she was 20 years ago.

  20. dave e

      It was fun, after that conversation, to wiki “Calliope” and learn she was the muse of heroic poetry. I’m sure I knew who she was 20 years ago.

  21. Andreas

      I had no idea how to say Calliope until my girlfriend reminded me of the old children’s show Dumbo’s Circus. Apparently there was an orangutan named Calliope or something. I think he played one.

  22. Andreas

      I had no idea how to say Calliope until my girlfriend reminded me of the old children’s show Dumbo’s Circus. Apparently there was an orangutan named Calliope or something. I think he played one.

  23. dave e

      Reason #124 my parents screwed me by forbidding televisions in our house (#123 is I’m just now getting to watch Hill Street Blues)

  24. dave e

      Reason #124 my parents screwed me by forbidding televisions in our house (#123 is I’m just now getting to watch Hill Street Blues)

  25. dave e

      maybe i could sue for punitive damages that you’re giving me

      (i’m feeling kinda jerky today)

  26. dave e

      maybe i could sue for punitive damages that you’re giving me

      (i’m feeling kinda jerky today)

  27. mike

      How could you forget Ghoti Magazine?

  28. mike

      How could you forget Ghoti Magazine?

  29. dave e

      nice…been in there and never tell anyone in person b/c don’t know how to say it

  30. dave e

      nice…been in there and never tell anyone in person b/c don’t know how to say it

  31. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      doesn’t sound like goatee?

  32. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      doesn’t sound like goatee?

  33. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      some folks still pronounce it eema instead of emma, tho thankfully I’ve never heard anybody say anal like analingus instead of ana like anna paquin.

  34. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      some folks still pronounce it eema instead of emma, tho thankfully I’ve never heard anybody say anal like analingus instead of ana like anna paquin.

  35. Jordan

      Fish. Ghoti is pronounced Fish. Doesn’t anyone watch Batman anymore?

  36. Matt Bell

      This is a fun post. In The Collagist’s defense: This is how Dzanc does things. We’re a press where our authors don’t always say the name the way we say it, and so I can’t say I’m too surprised that we ended up with a magazine that has the same effect. Although, to be honest, I’ve never heard anyone say The Collagist wrong– They’re just not sure how to say it, and so tentatively do it right.

  37. Jordan

      Fish. Ghoti is pronounced Fish. Doesn’t anyone watch Batman anymore?

  38. Matt Bell

      This is a fun post. In The Collagist’s defense: This is how Dzanc does things. We’re a press where our authors don’t always say the name the way we say it, and so I can’t say I’m too surprised that we ended up with a magazine that has the same effect. Although, to be honest, I’ve never heard anyone say The Collagist wrong– They’re just not sure how to say it, and so tentatively do it right.

  39. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      Will you start a second post abt writer’s names? This is especially concerning when you’re still not 100% certain that the first syllable of your friend and AWP roommate’s name rhymes with caw and now cow.

  40. dave e

      I suspect you’re right … maybe I’ve read too many books about John Gotti (and William Calley, re my Calliope shenanigans)

  41. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      Will you start a second post abt writer’s names? This is especially concerning when you’re still not 100% certain that the first syllable of your friend and AWP roommate’s name rhymes with caw and now cow.

  42. dave e

      I suspect you’re right … maybe I’ve read too many books about John Gotti (and William Calley, re my Calliope shenanigans)

  43. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      duh-zank, right?

      I don’t really see what’s difficult abt Collagist tho? How else would you pronounce it besides collage-ist? (I guess the g is mildly troubling, whether it’s soft or sounds like jist, but nobody’s gonna notice that?)

  44. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      duh-zank, right?

      I don’t really see what’s difficult abt Collagist tho? How else would you pronounce it besides collage-ist? (I guess the g is mildly troubling, whether it’s soft or sounds like jist, but nobody’s gonna notice that?)

  45. Vaughan Simons

      What *is* the US pronunciation of Collagist? Is it wrong that, over here, I say it in a similar way to collagen, because extending the ‘a’ into an ‘ah’ as in ‘collage’ just feels wrong?

      Erm. I’ll get my coat.

  46. Vaughan Simons

      What *is* the US pronunciation of Collagist? Is it wrong that, over here, I say it in a similar way to collagen, because extending the ‘a’ into an ‘ah’ as in ‘collage’ just feels wrong?

      Erm. I’ll get my coat.

  47. Matt Cozart
  48. Matt Cozart
  49. Paulo Campos

      i studied modernist literature in graduate school. another student with the same concentration regularly pronounced Yeats (yEEts) in a seminar. this is the academic equivalent of pissing yourself during PhysEd.

      another friend pronounces Pynchon like the Cajun chef, but he’s just trying to tick everyone off.

  50. Paulo Campos

      i studied modernist literature in graduate school. another student with the same concentration regularly pronounced Yeats (yEEts) in a seminar. this is the academic equivalent of pissing yourself during PhysEd.

      another friend pronounces Pynchon like the Cajun chef, but he’s just trying to tick everyone off.

  51. Sean

      You want to see pretentiousness?

      Get some egg-heads in a pronounce “Sartre” battle.

      Been thar, dun that

  52. Sean

      You want to see pretentiousness?

      Get some egg-heads in a pronounce “Sartre” battle.

      Been thar, dun that

  53. mimi

      Ben Stiller gets hung up on “Favre” in “There’s Something About Mary”.

  54. mimi

      Ben Stiller gets hung up on “Favre” in “There’s Something About Mary”.

  55. dave e

      I kant believe you went there

  56. dave e

      I kant believe you went there

  57. Lincoln

      what the hegel are you talking about?

  58. Lincoln

      what the hegel are you talking about?

  59. mimi

      How Hume-illiating. I think he might be DeLeuze-ional.

  60. mimi

      How Hume-illiating. I think he might be DeLeuze-ional.

  61. Lincoln

      this has all the marx of an annoying thread. I’m already getting confucius about it.

  62. Lincoln

      this has all the marx of an annoying thread. I’m already getting confucius about it.

  63. Casey

      That Favre thing has always bugged me, only thing in this thread that has. For a while it was just “Far”- ignoring the V, then people gave up and switched the V and the R. Like all at once. Like there was some Diet of Worms, a Tennis Court Oath on the subject. Maybe it’s like the French (Freedom) Fries thing, American football fans just refusing to acknowledge the idiosyncratic nature of a French based name. Then again, maybe that’s how they pronounce it in Mississippi and I’m the one acting the cretin. Still Kant/Can’t, whatever, but Favre…it’s like a mass media delusion.

  64. Casey

      That Favre thing has always bugged me, only thing in this thread that has. For a while it was just “Far”- ignoring the V, then people gave up and switched the V and the R. Like all at once. Like there was some Diet of Worms, a Tennis Court Oath on the subject. Maybe it’s like the French (Freedom) Fries thing, American football fans just refusing to acknowledge the idiosyncratic nature of a French based name. Then again, maybe that’s how they pronounce it in Mississippi and I’m the one acting the cretin. Still Kant/Can’t, whatever, but Favre…it’s like a mass media delusion.

  65. reynard

      at least it’s pretty lacanic

  66. reynard

      at least it’s pretty lacanic

  67. Jhon Baker

      eeeee oh gah

  68. Jhon Baker

      eeeee oh gah

  69. Jhon Baker

      okay, I think some of these are really easy to pronounce. A few are more difficult but mostly they are easy and common.

  70. Jhon Baker

      okay, I think some of these are really easy to pronounce. A few are more difficult but mostly they are easy and common.

  71. Sean

      Louis Armstrong said the same thing about the word tomato.

  72. Sean

      Louis Armstrong said the same thing about the word tomato.

  73. Vaughan Simons

      Which is pronounced toe-mar-toe. Obviously.

      (I think that’s my cab pulling up outside.)

  74. Vaughan Simons

      Which is pronounced toe-mar-toe. Obviously.

      (I think that’s my cab pulling up outside.)

  75. Charlie

      Sartre, Goethe (pretentiousness difficulty level one)

      Descartes, Klee (as in Paul) (pretentiousness difficulty level two)

      Teilhard de Chardin, Georges Rouault (pretentiousness difficulty level three)

  76. Charlie

      Sartre, Goethe (pretentiousness difficulty level one)

      Descartes, Klee (as in Paul) (pretentiousness difficulty level two)

      Teilhard de Chardin, Georges Rouault (pretentiousness difficulty level three)

  77. reynard

      a level 65 necromancer can summon an army of undead kin at the cost of health over-time to the necromancer. the number of undead increases based on the quantity of nearby corpses.

  78. reynard

      a level 65 necromancer can summon an army of undead kin at the cost of health over-time to the necromancer. the number of undead increases based on the quantity of nearby corpses.

  79. Dan Wickett

      Duh-Zank would be accurate and so would the Merriam Webster pronunciation of Collagist. We have heard however, college – ist.

  80. Dan Wickett

      Duh-Zank would be accurate and so would the Merriam Webster pronunciation of Collagist. We have heard however, college – ist.

  81. MoGa

      ???

  82. MoGa

      ???

  83. Kyle Minor

      A colleague at my first teaching job did his best to belittle me in front of his graduate students at a party. He asked me what I thought of the author of Libra. “Don DeLillo?” I said, and I pronounced it Dee-Lill-Low. “Dee-lee-yo,” he said, and had a big chuckle he meant everyone to share, which they all did.

      Hell of it is, I still don’t know the right way to pronounce that guy’s name.

  84. Kyle Minor

      A colleague at my first teaching job did his best to belittle me in front of his graduate students at a party. He asked me what I thought of the author of Libra. “Don DeLillo?” I said, and I pronounced it Dee-Lill-Low. “Dee-lee-yo,” he said, and had a big chuckle he meant everyone to share, which they all did.

      Hell of it is, I still don’t know the right way to pronounce that guy’s name.