March 21st, 2009 / 11:06 pm
Haut or not
Haut or Not: Zachary German
Tao Lin emailed us a sideways pic of Zachary German’s bookcase. I decided there was no point in straightening out the pic since German wasn’t straight (that’s arguably not a gay joke). Also, one can better see the spines this way. I cropped the entry into three separate pics (conveniently separated by shelves). There’s no way to do this except after the break — trust me.
Notice it’s in alphabetical order and only goes to P — we can gather there is another gigantic case somewhere. While the ordering system is explicit, it’s odd how the bottom M – P shelf is the ‘depressed and feeling weak’ shelf, and how the middle E – K shelf has a ‘irrevocability of mankind’ feel to it, and the ‘head trip cerebral’ vibe of the first [A]B – C shelf (except for Carver and Beattie of course).
I’ll spare you (and me) any extended commentary, only to say that this is terribly haut. A bookcase like this makes me want to be kidnapped and held in his room/apt/flat/studio/house[?] — I’d even eat that seaweed shit he’s obsessed with. For the records, I haven’t been (or am) particularly enthralled by Zachary German’s post-ironic deadpan-verging-on-reticent internet countenance, so the ‘homosexual agenda’ has not won yet. It’s just nice to see this collection, almost credits the staunch inagility of German’s Dick and Jane-esque “See spot run/Robert feels sad” self-consciously ABRASIVE (see, ironic!) tone.
Eat When You Feel Sad is forthcoming from Melville House in 2010 (no joke it’s on their website — I only say that because of past skepticism about the verity of German’s claims). Some will herald it; some will claim the death of literature. But folks, let’s not argue about what is or isn’t dead, what’s punk or isn’t punk, what’s gay or isn’t gay. It’s quite clear that Zachary is an ‘undead gay punk.’ Zachary German will not comment on this post because he’s that fucking charming. Jimmy feels sad.
Tags: zachary german
It gets a little weird in the second and third pics but the first one is haut enough to get the job done- all that Cooper, the two best Conrad books (Nostromo & Lord Jim) plus a few more for good measure, and the Grove edition of the Burroughs trilogy. He’s good to go.
Also, I think the sideways picture is pretty brilliant. It makes this game much easier to play.
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March 25th, 2009 / 10:05 amEllen Frances—
This is a complete rip off of ‘My Shelf’ on DUDES IN SUITS BLOG
which I had told Zachary about one morning.
Biters
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I have twin Thunderballs too!
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I am so digging the Klaus Roehler. And the well-thumbed _Five by Pinkwater_.
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just like i thought: zach is a mix between a sex-wet late-teen and an old woman.
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’stuanch inagility’
damn, sweet phrasing
i don’t know
…damn
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March 22nd, 2009 / 1:10 pmtao—
i mean ’sweet word choice,’ i think
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nice edition of ’secrets and surprises’
still don’t know what ‘elephant’ by raymond carver is
is that yannick murphy, do i spot yannick murphy
didn’t realize ‘brightness falls’ was, like, a ‘pun’ on ‘darkness falls’ until sometime after learning of ‘brightness falls’
currently unsure of ‘darkness falls’ is a cliche or something
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March 22nd, 2009 / 4:48 pmtao—
meant to type ‘if’ not ‘of’
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March 22nd, 2009 / 10:53 pmMark Doten—
elephant is the british version of carver’s post-cathedral stories (the same ones americans get at the end of where i’m calling from)
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nice edition of ’secrets and surprises’
still don’t know what ‘elephant’ by raymond carver is
is that yannick murphy, do i spot yannick murphy
didn’t realize ‘brightness falls’ was, like, a ‘pun’ on ‘darkness falls’ until sometime after learning of ‘brightness falls’
currently unsure of ‘darkness falls’ is a cliche or something
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new robison is out ‘btw’
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new robison is out ‘btw’
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damn, double commented
…damn
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chris killen
what bookshelf ‘isn’t’ he on
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wanted to make over 100 comments
having problems thinking of more comments
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what are people’s thoughts about the conspicuously missing ‘like life’ re lorrie moore
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is jereme there
what are jereme’s thoughts
mike young, where are you
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is anyone there
am i alone
am i alone on htmlgiant on a sunday
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reloading this page repeatedly
for how long will i be alone
is it possible that i remain alone, like, forever
a la the statistical probability of a banana going through a wall when thrown at a wall
[just referenced my story 'insomnia for a better tomorrow' from 'bed' (melville hosue, 2007)]
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[mildly worried that if zachary takes a photo of my bookshelf he'll take a photo not of my 'most read' books, on the shelf located by my bed, but of my 'vaguely unorganized' section in either of two locations in my 'main room']
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i used to have that same ’stranger’
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:16 pmtao—
nice to see you here david
what’s going on
saw your family on matador
seems good, felt positive feelings toward the photo
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just rhetorically thought ‘can i make 1000 comments?’
rhetorically but distinctly with a question mark at the end of it
(‘keep in mind’ i usually don’t use question marks)
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this is so weird or something
or just really normal or something
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should i post a deleted excerpt from ’shoplifting from american apparel’ here
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:33 pmjimmy—
yes
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:40 pmtao—
the following is a deleted excerpt from an early draft of ’shoplifting from american apparel’
names have since been changed, the following excerpt was completed ‘excised’ at some point, likely within the first 20% of the complete time spent on ’shoplifting from american apparel’
is everyone ready
hope this is going to be okay
******************************************************
Mark was with Robert and Margaret in Brooklyn. Robert was very drunk. He lay on a wooden fruit stand. Mark and Margaret looked at Robert.
“Why did you get so drunk,” said Mark.
Later Robert was walking around and he walked back to his apartment.
***************************************
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:43 pmtao—
*fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk* completed = completely *fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk*
March 23rd, 2009 / 12:10 amjames yeh—
you should send this to the new yorker bro
should i
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:44 pmtao—
[this is 'actually' in reply to the *fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk* comment]
*damn re formatting* redo below *damn re formatting*
*fuckkk* completed = completely *fuckkk*
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:50 pmjimmy—
almost palidrome
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tao you are not alone
i’m am here too
thank you for your dedication to this post
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:34 pmtao—
hi jimmy
glad you’re here
just commented on hipsterunoff
not sure what’s going to happen next
just glanced vaguely at something else on the computer screen
nothing really
yeah, just, like, glanced abstractly, like, didn’t do anything really
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yo wudup tao
feeling positive you had positive feelings
sunday ‘mellow work’ transpiring
just ’spit’ some lines at twitter i’m not sure about
basically making fun of a dude who followed me then bailed
at first i thought i’d written the best line of my ‘novel’ so far
now i’m not sure
seattle crapweather
otherwise all good
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i keep commenting
commented three times on hipsterrunoff
is james yeh out there
you there james
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:45 pmjimmy—
james lives in nyc i think.
you and him should get some juice and drink it in central park
james, give tao your cell #
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:49 pmtao—
james and i ate chips last night bro
‘we are already connected’
the scene is alive, we are eating chips
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March 22nd, 2009 / 11:41 pmjames yeh—
almost commented in a way completely derivative of one of tao’s previous comments:
“hi tao
sorry, i was “afk” for the past 7+ hrs
screen when i got back:
1) gchat w rozi
2) gchat w ellen frances
3) gchat w tao
4) gchat w htmlgiant
5) gchat w lincoln
‘we are already connected’
sweet bro.”
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thinking about linking this post on my blog
would be the first instance of http://heheheheheheheeheheheehehe.com/ linking htmlgiant
any thoughts about this
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:53 pmjimmy—
muumuu linked to sam pink, so your plan is okay
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:54 pmtao—
i have often wondered what sam pink thinks about me
damn
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james should call his band ‘yeh yeh yehs’
you two are part of the scene bro
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i’m not doing well on amazon today
panicking
i’ll be okay i think
what do people do on days they don’t do well on amazon
is there a history of things in that regard
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March 22nd, 2009 / 5:55 pmjimmy—
tarzan did okay in the amazon.
jane not so good.
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already 6 p.m.
is this real
what time did i get here
what time is it now, is it 7 p.m. already or something
it’s 6:01 p.m., just looked
seems like it was just 3 p.m. ‘however’
what is time
is it real
am i just ‘being a dumbass’
what is happening to me right now
probably going to buy bottled water soon
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should’ve put quotation marks as follows, i think: am i ‘just being a dumbass’
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just thought ‘can i make 10,000 comments’ with a feeling of being challenged, ‘in a good way’
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just thought ‘10,000 comments, that’s impossible’ with an image of myself ‘chuckling’
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‘chuckling’ looks weird
chuckle
i guess even ‘chuckle’ looks weird
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i’m alone again
does a person really experience loneliness until they have been alone on htmlgiant
missing zachary on gchat
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March 22nd, 2009 / 6:15 pmdavid miller—
i’m still checking wudup
forgot to ‘reply’ correctly to your above comment
thanks for posting excerpt
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gonna give a ‘rundown’ of my computer screen
(l to r)
1) internet explorer
a) gmail – binky.tabby
-1 gchat – sarah
-2 gchat – crls
-3 gchat – zachary
-4 gchat – james yeh
b) statcounter
c) blogger
d) salesrankexpress
e) htmlgiant
2) firefox
a) gmail – muumuuhouse
3) itunes
4) microsoft word – on the bus to atlantic city…
5) microsoft word – i don’t to go to sleep but i don’t know what i’m waiting for
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I just read all of your comments, Tao.
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March 22nd, 2009 / 6:24 pmGene Morgan—
They were good.
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the poetry foundation’s harriet blog referenced rauan klassnick’s htmlgiant post about negative reviews.
htmlgiant = mainstream now.
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think i’m forthcoming on the poetry foundation
wrote a ‘retarded essay’ i think for them
think they’re editing it or something
not sure what is happening
not sure if i revealed critical information
seems okay
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feels like i’m going to cry
listening to ‘broken radio’ by rainer maria
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going to poop
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March 22nd, 2009 / 7:00 pmtao—
hope either james yeh or jereme has commented when i cmoe back
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is it really the 22nd? damn. i think i have some bills i didn’t pay. i can’t face them now. listening to editors who sound like interpol who sounded like joy division kinda. ‘well be careful angel, this life is just too long…. all sparks will burn out in the end.’
oh: ‘you burn like a bouncing cigarette.’
i had a dream maybe an hour ago that i visited some religious commune on the pacific coast up in the state of washington and they made us empty our pockets and i felt undercover and excited and afraid. i was looking for someone’s sister who was gone.
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allmand the hundred years war
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back
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what is this, ‘innocente’
who is this
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afk
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i just looked at htmlgiant and saw this post had 60+ comments and i thought “no, no way” in an “are you kidding me?” kind of voice, but laughingly
adverbingly
getting ready to record and post another “RAD” poetry video for anjali khosla mullany and edward mullany
http://noojournal.blogspot.com
i feel like i’m really priming myself for mockery by calling this fundraiser “rad poetry” instead of “bad poetry”
barry graham already gently made fun of me on his blog, but i think he liked the poem
it’s difficult to tell what anyone really thinks
everyone is always trying to make you think they think a certain way instead of just letting you know what they think, they can’t even help it
my microphone is balanced on my sunglasses in kind of a dickish way
very nice weather today
hung out with my friend jack christian, he read me a great poem, someone should solicit him for their poetry journal
this comment turned into a livejournal post
thanks a lot, tao
just thought it would be funny if tao were Lot from the bible
funny if tao and zach german made a movie recreating the bible and playing all the characters themselves in elaborate costumes
oh well
enough of dis bullshit yo
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March 22nd, 2009 / 8:56 pmNathan (Nate) Tyree—
I love this comment.
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March 22nd, 2009 / 10:41 pmmike young—
changed plans, a guest star is writing a poem for anjali and edward
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had a small green juice with lemon
juicer gave me discount on kombucha, 2.79 i think
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The Bond books seem out of place, and yet they fascinate me. If only there were a couple of Destroyer books mixed in. If only.
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Justin?
I like what you wrote about all those books. I like the Cooper and the Genet, because I am gay, a lot. And I like William S. Burroughs because he is gay a lot and because sometimes he is other things, too. I think it would be cool to have an exterminator or a lot of ice picks, here, on HTML because of all the bugs.
Dode Bellamy has nice legs. I want to touch Dodie Bellamy’s legs because I want legs like Dodie Bellamy’s.
Stephen Elliot throws nice parties. I was there one time and these police showed up. And everyone threw bottles at the police.
If I write my name STEVEN TRULL a hundred times will that get me a lot of attention because I am gay? Tao? Help me out. You were raised by DOLPHINS. You are not necessarily gay. You travel all over the world saying the SAME THING: DOLPHINS. Or sometimes you say: CHICKENS. I am vegetarian. And so are you, which makes you almost even closer to almost gay. I DON’T KNOW HOW TO WRITE. So, I say: STEVEN TRULL. And people go: WHAT? You know how to do this, right? Make everyone popular like you. And happy. Because when you are popular it is hard to be depressed everybody wants your ‘OKAY’. I know you are kind and generous and cute except with your brother. So, please help. I beat up my brother everyday. Endless emails and stuff. Don’t say anything. I get it. THANK YOU. YOU HAVE HELPED ME A LOT. Alright, here goes: (POEM FOR TAO LIN):
STEVEN TRULL
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ALMOST DONE
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TAO LIN
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IS THAT A HUNDRED? I CAN’T COUNT. I just need love a little bit. Justin? I love you.
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damn
first comment
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everybody’s pretty lydia millet soft skull
dear everybody michael kimball A
richard lange dead boys
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March 22nd, 2009 / 9:12 pmSteven Trull—
Totally.
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mike:
no i was just fucking around. they are good. the readings are excellent.
i really like the line about kissing the neck and seeing god.
and the mickey d’s apologist, which was very clever.
sincerely. good shit.
keep em going.
is it already if i use the one of mine in print. in the 09 dogz anthology. if not its cool.
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March 22nd, 2009 / 10:33 pmmike young—
thanks dude, i was just being neurotic, i think i am always afraid of life turning back into high school, people should tell me to suck it up
put that sucker in the dogz, that’s sweet, it’s all yours, use it wherevez
chelsea martin and jack christian and rachel b. glaser are all going to do video poems, those will be up sometime in the future
i was rooting for ok state
that one dude from pitt is huge
i don’t know anything about basketball, but that guy is huge
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i meant alright, what the fuck does already mean.
already… my ncaa bracket is fucked. thanks a lot oklahoma state for not upsetting pitt.
although my other final four picks are solid i think. carolina, mich state, and memphis.
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pinkie and ring finger on right hand are ‘asleep’
‘pins and needles,’ yo
yo
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circle jerk. xoxo.
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hi
this is me 7+ hrs too late
i should have been here earlier
so as to join in the conversation
i’m late
i always miss out on things by being late.
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just realized i totally forgot to do something today that i was supposed to do (in addition to having an internet conversation with people i’m friends with or like or just have seen on comment threads before)
instead i went to the bike workshop, then dinner, then coffee w nicolle elizabeth
now commenting on a post that has been evacuated
fuck
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no love for knut hamsun?
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worst wcommcents seciton ever
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listening to nada surf, just glanced at unopened toilet paper roll stolen from nyu’s bobst library
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March 23rd, 2009 / 12:12 amjames yeh—
places i’ve recently thought about stealing toilet paper from:
-hungarian pastry shop near columbia
-my work
-chinese restaurant “red bowl” in williamsburg
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what’s the difference between ‘apropos of nothing’ and ‘in a non-sequitur’
sometimes i use one, sometimes the other
without thinking really before doing it
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today i told someone that the butthole surfers had played at mccarren park this past summer
a total lie
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March 23rd, 2009 / 1:22 pmbarry—
thats funny
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have thought maybe 20-50 times in my life that maybe i should maybe only talk to people on the internet or irl or comment things or write emails when i’m on caffeine or other things like caffeine
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sort of thought about everyone else’s comments being deleted from this post so it was just my comments
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approaching 100 comments
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wish i was alone on html giant
other people are here now
trying to be in a fetal position but people are, like, here, now
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forgot to put ‘fetal position’ in quotation marks
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can’t be in a fetal position with other people around bro
better sit up straight like a real person bro
eye contact bro
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this is zachary german
the past ~two posts as ‘jamie’ have been by me, zachary german
i’ve never heard that band azure ray
have you tao
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March 23rd, 2009 / 12:19 amjames yeh—
i know that band
i fall asleep sometimes to that band
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i listen to azure ray regularly
just put ‘heel’ of my hand on different parts of face and it felt smooth
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damn
i’m editing my novel ‘eat when you feel sad’ (melville house 2010)
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what are you doing tao
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james yeh, are you still there
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does your cat ever eat cheese zachary, can it do that
like, how would it do it, seems really hard
i just see the cheese like hitting the cat in the face really hard
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james yeh, are you going to rebecca curtis reading wednesday
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the blow just came on, felt vaguely surprised for no concrete reason
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i don’t think the cats eat cheese
i feed them other shit sometimes
you’re like the black and white cat
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zachary, can you just talk to me
do you have to talk to yeh and me
i mean, can it just be me
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do you think ‘the blow’ is a cocaine reference
damn, if i ever like am going to discuss cocaine i am going to refer to it as ‘the blow’
a la ‘i have some of ‘the blow,’ do you want any’
and then take out a stick of gum
and like hold it in a way as to suggest that it contains ‘the blow’
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haven’t tried zyrtech yet
is that how you spell it
the ‘tech’ part seems wrong, ‘yet right’
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probably not
rebecca is a really good reader though bro
you should go
i think i have a thing i have to go to instead but i can’t remember right now
are you going to go?
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this is zachary german
all of the comments as ‘jamie’ except for the first one were me also
tao,
okay bro i’m sorry
i love you
just heard you cough, are you okay
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wikipedia
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feel like it’s, like, has multiple meanings
like she vaguely thought about it and a lot of meanings went in her head
and when enough meanings went in, without any being processed, it like reached a threshold
and it became like one of those decisions you make that seem like ‘it has to be that’
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johnny cash’s cover of ‘hurt’ is great, going to play the video on youtube now
(just typed ‘wikipedia’ instead of ‘youtube’ above, felt surprised / awesome upon noticing my error)
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did i cough, not sure
weird you could hear me through the door
just thought about the door
and like the hallway
seems weird
just ‘entertained’ the idea that you’re a superhero with powers of hearing
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listening to itunes on “shuffle”
dismemberment plan is on: “gyroscope”
travis morrison was playing within a 45 min subway ride from me last night
i was taking a 7pm nap
now it’s “tommy” by the who
just thought “i need to do work”
had previously thought: “should i count this under ‘hours spent working on things related to writing but not writing’”
haven’t decided whether i will/should
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thinking about blogging
‘5x news item’
noon publication, rain taxi interview
some other things
joe swanberg premier maybe
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just thought “this is like a public gchat”
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‘i recall an interview with [the blow girl] by miranda july in the believer’
seems as though she said the name ‘the blow’ is not a reference to cocaine
do you think cocaine is a reference to ‘the blow,’ ‘in a way?’
johnny cash – hurt
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmVAWKfJ4Go
can we kill ourselves soon
i think i am going to philly this weekend, maybe next week
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just thought about ’storming’ out of my room and attacking you, zachary
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interesting re cocaine being a reference to ‘the blow’
just thought of a theory where if everyone said cocaine references ‘the blow’ like time could be reversed concretely
and we would all go backwards to make like our thoughts a reality
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damn
feel so empty in a way
when i ‘die’ irl what will happen to my web presence
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just thought “i wonder how i’ll feel about this tomorrow”
just thought “probably badly”
just thought “no filter”
or “not enough filter”
“don’t know how to make this better”
“will probably stop now”
[edited]
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just revised thought: “this is like a public chatroom”, then thought “but chatrooms *are* public”.
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distinctly began feeling sad on first of second ‘refreshes’ with no new comments
just remembered in the virgin suicides when someone like gets impaled by jumping out of a second floor window or something
like they jumped out of a two story house and died in a suicide
seems weird
like something impaled them
not sure, everything seems vague
just thought elijah wood was in the virgin suicides
completely unsure of anything now
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20% done reading my novel
feel it’s really good, like something a communist nation would come up with
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i thought it was josh hartnett in the virgin suicides. which character is elijah wood?
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i called jamie ‘jumpaha’ today, trying it out as a ‘pet name’
was less than totally successful
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‘like something a communist nation would come up with’
read that and viewed it in completely a new way
like it is actually set in a tundra, and the harsh weather conditions (which aren’t mentioned) are the cause of all the emotional things
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excited about tomorrow night bro
think i’m going to exercise now
got new $30 earphones despite short-term financial situation
was going to text you that but remembered i owed you $140 and felt like maybe i would seem ‘bad’
seems okay now
sold ~$600 worth american apparel stock friday, waiting on the transfer
good night bro
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i meant that like i could see it like destroying something
like that by reading it people will be unable to think a certain way or something
that it will be damaging to an accepted philosophy or something
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zachary german high noon
zachary german red river
zachary german the man from laramie
tao lin riders of the purple sage
tao lin the left-handed gun
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of all the things she siasd
ready stead go
i’m not in love with jukebox jury
…
etc
ready steady go
ready steady go
ready steady go
that’s all
i want it fabulous
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also
innocente
buy a mac computer or something
do something that costs money
buy all of tao lin’s books or something
make this a true post or somehow
come to boston in the sprintime
i’m going there almost
do something
i will slap you
then see her
i will
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tao,
sorry, i rarely read/comment the haut or not threads.
i only came in here today to see why the comments were so explosive.
i have nothing to say. this is all ego masturbation. it bores me.
who cares what you have read or do read?
this series reminds me of the website ratemypoo.com but people don’t get upset when you say their shit is ugly there.
mike is wrong. not every one hides behind a false smile.
i am glad zach german finally got written about on htmlgiant. i know he has been quietly waiting for it.
i was going to write something about him on mean monday awhile back but a.) i didn’t really feel like being mean any more. b.) i knew zach would feel less valuable by not writing about him at all thus being even more mean c.) so i guess i was mean but apathy had a lot to do with it.
zach’s junkie aesthetic makes me giggle. he tries very hard.
i don’t think any one would even pay attention to his existence if tao did not back him.
this does not make him a less valuable person. it is just an observation.
i guess i do have things to say when i don’t have anything to say at all.
okay i will end this on a mean note.
eh never mind.
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okay i tried to say ‘controversial’ things to birth comment expansion
i think that is what tao wants? this post to stand out compared to others.
i just negated everything ‘controversial’ by announcing it is contrived thus killing the chance of comment birthing.
i am passive aggressive.
apparently i have a lot of misplaced anger.
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zach,
i give knut props. you reading it i could care less about.
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check this out…
this is mine…