March 6th, 2009 / 3:27 pm
Haut or not

Your Taste: A Review

I searched “my books” and “my bookshelf” on flickr and reviewed stranger’s tastes in literature.

book1

Did you read Everything is Illuminated twice? I read the first 5 pages once, then felt irritated and put it down. Kudos on Lolita though, it really is an awesome book, and answers in full ‘why men love bitches,’ so I don’t see the point on reading an entire book on that. They made a movie out of The Namesake with Kumar. It was like Joy Luck Club except with Indians. I teared the entire movie, though I think it was the curry. As for ‘how to save your own life,’ don’t fly if you’re scared of it. Just fly a kite.

book2

Shakespeare was okay, but we all know the true voice of our mortality: Stephen King. I notice a ‘trilogy of harrowing experiences’: Catcher in the Rye, Wuthering Heights, and Night (Jewish writer, spinster freak, Jewish writer). Life is good. And then there’s two indictments of society: American Pyscho and In Cold Blood. Total death toll: 6 million + about two dozen. You’re a real charmer.

book3

Okay, I get the point. You like having sex with monkeys. Have you heard of Darwin? We — like, humanity n’ shit, is trying to evolve outta that uh situation there. You’re a walking female condom commercial lady, seriously.

book4

Hey Mr. Downer, please try and get a girlfriend. You need to get laid. Zarathustra ain’t speaking tonight homey. Here’s a Socratic question:  why the fuck you reading Plato? Platonic is your problem bro — you gotta nail that chick. Being and Nothingness is only asserted when you ain’t gettin’ Putang and Assinface. As for Kierkegaard, either you get a life and bang some bitches, or you can go on having a dickhead bookshelf.

Conclusion: your taste in books sucks.

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63 Comments

  1. davidpeak

      All that shelf needs is The Unbearable Lightness of Being and The Valley of the Dolls and then they can stop collecting.

  2. davidpeak

      All that shelf needs is The Unbearable Lightness of Being and The Valley of the Dolls and then they can stop collecting.

  3. davidpeak

      the first one, that is.

  4. davidpeak

      the first one, that is.

  5. Steven Trull

      No, but I read Kathy Acker’s “Hello, I’m Erica Jong”. It was hilarious. And I like the cover of Everything Is Illuminated, I think.

  6. Steven Trull

      No, but I read Kathy Acker’s “Hello, I’m Erica Jong”. It was hilarious. And I like the cover of Everything Is Illuminated, I think.

  7. peter b

      i read that whole thing i think but my eyes got all filmy and i don’t feel like i read it

  8. peter b

      i read that whole thing i think but my eyes got all filmy and i don’t feel like i read it

  9. gena

      i don’t understand why people hate everything is illuminated. hating it is a fad now. i’ve read it twice, and i can say that it’s affected me a lot more than most other books.

  10. gena

      i don’t understand why people hate everything is illuminated. hating it is a fad now. i’ve read it twice, and i can say that it’s affected me a lot more than most other books.

  11. gena

      i don’t understand why people hate everything is illuminated. hating it is a fad now. i’ve read it twice, and i can say that it’s affected me a lot more than most other books.

  12. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      I saw the movie. As a film it was flawed, but I liked it.

  13. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      I saw the movie. As a film it was flawed, but I liked it.

  14. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      I saw the movie. As a film it was flawed, but I liked it.

  15. Jimmy Chen

      i didn’t hate it cause i didn’t read it. i just wrote about it cuz it was in the photo.

  16. Jimmy Chen

      i didn’t hate it cause i didn’t read it. i just wrote about it cuz it was in the photo.

  17. Jimmy Chen

      i didn’t hate it cause i didn’t read it. i just wrote about it cuz it was in the photo.

  18. Jimmy Chen

      i’m confused. please explain your logic.

  19. Jimmy Chen

      i’m confused. please explain your logic.

  20. Jimmy Chen

      i’m confused. please explain your logic.

  21. gena

      the movie was horrible in comparison to the book. the book helped me get through one of the most depressing and difficult weeks of my life. i just see a lot of people insulting the book and its author and i think it’s silly, because for a man that wrote only two books, he seems to be getting criticized a lot for such a small body of work.

  22. gena

      the movie was horrible in comparison to the book. the book helped me get through one of the most depressing and difficult weeks of my life. i just see a lot of people insulting the book and its author and i think it’s silly, because for a man that wrote only two books, he seems to be getting criticized a lot for such a small body of work.

  23. gena

      the movie was horrible in comparison to the book. the book helped me get through one of the most depressing and difficult weeks of my life. i just see a lot of people insulting the book and its author and i think it’s silly, because for a man that wrote only two books, he seems to be getting criticized a lot for such a small body of work.

  24. Jimmy Chen

      i love books that help people with difficult times of one person’s life, so i’m glad that did it for you. this post was a ‘joke’ post, don’t worry gena. it’s friday, i’m already looking forward to daylight savings.

  25. Jimmy Chen

      i love books that help people with difficult times of one person’s life, so i’m glad that did it for you. this post was a ‘joke’ post, don’t worry gena. it’s friday, i’m already looking forward to daylight savings.

  26. davidpeak

      The Unbearable Lightness of Being is “serious” European lit, often serving as a gateway into more difficult reading. It would go well with Nabokov–especially considering this reader’s selection of Lolita over something like Pale Fire of Pnin–like they’re just dipping a toe into the big-book realm.

      The Valley of the Dolls because it’s fun/trashy/pseudo-hip. It shows that, hey, books are great to have around, but they don’t always have to make you smarter or deeper.

      I guess it seems like this person has purchased a lot of books that they feel they “should” read in some way. That’s how I was struck by what I saw. I thought it might be fun to round things out.

      Sorry for the confusion.

  27. davidpeak

      The Unbearable Lightness of Being is “serious” European lit, often serving as a gateway into more difficult reading. It would go well with Nabokov–especially considering this reader’s selection of Lolita over something like Pale Fire of Pnin–like they’re just dipping a toe into the big-book realm.

      The Valley of the Dolls because it’s fun/trashy/pseudo-hip. It shows that, hey, books are great to have around, but they don’t always have to make you smarter or deeper.

      I guess it seems like this person has purchased a lot of books that they feel they “should” read in some way. That’s how I was struck by what I saw. I thought it might be fun to round things out.

      Sorry for the confusion.

  28. Jimmy Chen

      i love books that help people with difficult times of one person’s life, so i’m glad that did it for you. this post was a ‘joke’ post, don’t worry gena. it’s friday, i’m already looking forward to daylight savings.

  29. davidpeak

      The Unbearable Lightness of Being is “serious” European lit, often serving as a gateway into more difficult reading. It would go well with Nabokov–especially considering this reader’s selection of Lolita over something like Pale Fire of Pnin–like they’re just dipping a toe into the big-book realm.

      The Valley of the Dolls because it’s fun/trashy/pseudo-hip. It shows that, hey, books are great to have around, but they don’t always have to make you smarter or deeper.

      I guess it seems like this person has purchased a lot of books that they feel they “should” read in some way. That’s how I was struck by what I saw. I thought it might be fun to round things out.

      Sorry for the confusion.

  30. Adam Robinson

      Oh man oh man I’m so pissed that you made fun of my favorite author. Why you gotta disrespect people.

      Hilarious post. Good eye picking out the books behind the candy jar. I mean candy margarita glass (complete with price sticker still stuck) — whoever owns those books also spends a lot at the gumball machines.

  31. Adam Robinson

      Oh man oh man I’m so pissed that you made fun of my favorite author. Why you gotta disrespect people.

      Hilarious post. Good eye picking out the books behind the candy jar. I mean candy margarita glass (complete with price sticker still stuck) — whoever owns those books also spends a lot at the gumball machines.

  32. Adam Robinson

      Oh man oh man I’m so pissed that you made fun of my favorite author. Why you gotta disrespect people.

      Hilarious post. Good eye picking out the books behind the candy jar. I mean candy margarita glass (complete with price sticker still stuck) — whoever owns those books also spends a lot at the gumball machines.

  33. Rachel

      The last shelf doesn’t say, “I’m a downer.” It says, “I haven’t bought a single book since the ones I was forced to buy in college.”

  34. Rachel

      The last shelf doesn’t say, “I’m a downer.” It says, “I haven’t bought a single book since the ones I was forced to buy in college.”

  35. Rachel

      The last shelf doesn’t say, “I’m a downer.” It says, “I haven’t bought a single book since the ones I was forced to buy in college.”

  36. darby

      ok, so now show a picture of your bookshelf.

  37. darby

      ok, so now show a picture of your bookshelf.

  38. darby

      i think all the htmlgiant contributers should show pictures of their bookshelves

  39. darby

      i think all the htmlgiant contributers should show pictures of their bookshelves

  40. darby

      ok, so now show a picture of your bookshelf.

  41. darby

      i think all the htmlgiant contributers should show pictures of their bookshelves

  42. Brad Green

      Excellent idea.

  43. Brad Green

      Excellent idea.

  44. Brad Green

      Excellent idea.

  45. james yeh

      agreed.

  46. james yeh

      agreed.

  47. james yeh

      agreed.

  48. Justin Taylor

      I agree with darby. I think this is such a great idea. I’ll totally offer my own shelf up for discussion. Jimmy, we should invite people to submit their bookshelves and then get them rated, like that website where they tell you if you’re hot or not. i think you’re the person to spearhead this project. What a great post, man. Kudos!

  49. Justin Taylor

      I agree with darby. I think this is such a great idea. I’ll totally offer my own shelf up for discussion. Jimmy, we should invite people to submit their bookshelves and then get them rated, like that website where they tell you if you’re hot or not. i think you’re the person to spearhead this project. What a great post, man. Kudos!

  50. Justin Taylor

      I agree with darby. I think this is such a great idea. I’ll totally offer my own shelf up for discussion. Jimmy, we should invite people to submit their bookshelves and then get them rated, like that website where they tell you if you’re hot or not. i think you’re the person to spearhead this project. What a great post, man. Kudos!

  51. Jimmy Chen

      thanks justin. ha, okay.

      party people of the west: email htmlgiant@gmail.com a pic (jpeg) of your bookshelf (400 pixels wide, under 300KB).

      we will rate them. this should be under a new category: haut or not

      all contributors should rate other people’s shelves.

  52. Jimmy Chen

      thanks justin. ha, okay.

      party people of the west: email htmlgiant@gmail.com a pic (jpeg) of your bookshelf (400 pixels wide, under 300KB).

      we will rate them. this should be under a new category: haut or not

      all contributors should rate other people’s shelves.

  53. Jimmy Chen

      thanks justin. ha, okay.

      party people of the west: email htmlgiant@gmail.com a pic (jpeg) of your bookshelf (400 pixels wide, under 300KB).

      we will rate them. this should be under a new category: haut or not

      all contributors should rate other people’s shelves.

  54. Blake Butler

      i love it. you should do a full post announcement for it.

      let’s wrangle

  55. Blake Butler

      i love it. you should do a full post announcement for it.

      let’s wrangle

  56. Blake Butler

      i love it. you should do a full post announcement for it.

      let’s wrangle

  57. ryan

      awesome post!

      i organized my bookshelves a couple of weekends ago and tried to take a picture but it didn’t turn out well.

  58. ryan

      awesome post!

      i organized my bookshelves a couple of weekends ago and tried to take a picture but it didn’t turn out well.

  59. ryan

      awesome post!

      i organized my bookshelves a couple of weekends ago and tried to take a picture but it didn’t turn out well.

  60. <HTMLGIANT> > Blog Archive » Haut or Not

      […] initiated and corroborated by J. Taylor and B. Bulter, respectively, and inspired by this recent post and the unfortunate yet captivating Hot or Not […]

  61. Yael

      Hilarious :) keep these posts coming!

  62. Yael

      Hilarious :) keep these posts coming!

  63. Yael

      Hilarious :) keep these posts coming!