Film still from Warhol's "Blow Job" (1963)

Still from "I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here" (2009)

Some people have [-] feelings towards Spencer Pratt, a reality TV celebrity choad-like character who made his debut in The Hills (a reality TV show about the social and emotional meanderings of rich kids in LA) as Heidi Montag’s then boyfriend, now husband. Most recently, he and Heidi quit I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here after an illness suffered by Heidi, caused by at first what the couple claimed to be “getting tortured,” then later attributed to Christian purging, “evil coming out of [her].” The two are devout born-again Christians.

DeVeren Bookwalter, the “anonymous” man receiving fellatio in Andy Warhol’s 35 minute film Blow Job, probably had [+] feelings towards his off-screen partner. This seems to be an +18 crowd, so bear with me when I say that compared to making love to the back of someone’s knee, the mouth is a holy place. When the Warholian 15 minutes of fame turns into 35 minutes of head, it’s time to bring out the stop watch.

Why am I posting about Spencer Pratt? Why do I know so much about this choad? Maybe Warhol’s films had a point — to look for the moments between the spectacle. Yes, yes, but it’s just so boring; I’d rather see someone cry, not come.