November 20th, 2008 / 12:21 am
Contests

OUR CONTEST HAS A WINNER! CONGRATULATIONS TO MARK

It was difficult to pick a winner.  Many of the submissions were excellent critiques of the photograph, especially Adam R’s Life is awesome and Darby’s Jesus Christ looks down and Larry and JImmy briefly…  Jereme managed to draw some human interest to the pink-dress character as a professional tree-kicker.  She’s almost forgivable in that light.  Almost.  Really, you are all winners in my eyes, but since I have to choose one, I think the winner is Mark:

[Here is the original photo, and the winning prose – JT]

  • Mark says:
  • November 18th, 2008 at 3:05 am
  • Come in and eat something. It’s all free for me. It’s all free from me. Do the dodododo. What’s new pussycat?

    My chest is elevator globules. I’m less bouncing than freighting. I can’t say where my car was parked.

    In retrospect, maybe this was a ridiculous idea.

  • This story’s richly detailed prose on vapidity validates the initial project: truthfully, a shallow one.  I appreciate the ominous voice and its multiple perspectives, artfully equal in number to the characters in the photograph and at the same time also the subtle voice of the reader/viewer/narrator.  I’m wondering, whose ridiculous idea was this in the first place?  And which ridiculous idea are we speaking about?  The jumping on the bed, the request for a story, my continual feelings of inadequacy?  Artfully and well done, Mark–congratulations and thank you.
    The prize for HTMLGiant’s first-ever literary contest is a bottle of homemade linen spray.
    +
    MARK, to collect your prize, contact me via my website with your address and I’ll fwd the info to our anonymous contest-runner, who will mail you the homemade linen spray.
    WINNER.

    WINNER.

  • Tags: ,

    30 Comments

    1. Matthew Simmons

        I was robbed.

    2. Matthew Simmons

        I was robbed.

    3. Matthew Simmons

        I was robbed.

    4. darby

        congrats Mark!

    5. darby

        congrats Mark!

    6. darby

        congrats Mark!

    7. Ryan Call

        what is linen spray?

    8. Ryan Call

        what is linen spray?

    9. Ryan Call

        what is linen spray?

    10. darby

        it freshens garments. It’s like perfume for your garments

    11. darby

        it freshens garments. It’s like perfume for your garments

    12. darby

        it freshens garments. It’s like perfume for your garments

    13. Matthew Simmons

        God, and my garments fucking stink, too. Dammit.

    14. Matthew Simmons

        God, and my garments fucking stink, too. Dammit.

    15. Matthew Simmons

        God, and my garments fucking stink, too. Dammit.

    16. Ryan Call

        oh like febreeze?

    17. Ryan Call

        oh like febreeze?

    18. darby

        it would’ve been a nice addition to the other linen sprays I’ve won.

    19. darby

        it would’ve been a nice addition to the other linen sprays I’ve won.

    20. Ryan Call

        oh like febreeze?

    21. darby

        it would’ve been a nice addition to the other linen sprays I’ve won.

    22. darby

        i think febreze is more like an all-purpose kind of spray. The prize was a homemade linen spray, so I can’t wait to hear feedback from Mark about it. Exciting!

    23. darby

        i think febreze is more like an all-purpose kind of spray. The prize was a homemade linen spray, so I can’t wait to hear feedback from Mark about it. Exciting!

    24. darby

        i think febreze is more like an all-purpose kind of spray. The prize was a homemade linen spray, so I can’t wait to hear feedback from Mark about it. Exciting!

    25. Mark

        Gotcha suckas! Oh!

    26. Mark

        Gotcha suckas! Oh!

    27. Mark

        Gotcha suckas! Oh!

    28. jereme

        that bitch still be kicking some trees down.

        she should have been in that wendy’s commercial where they kick trees for no apparent reason other than it is tuesday and trees exist to be kicked by brick shit house blond bitches bred for tree kicking.

    29. jereme

        that bitch still be kicking some trees down.

        she should have been in that wendy’s commercial where they kick trees for no apparent reason other than it is tuesday and trees exist to be kicked by brick shit house blond bitches bred for tree kicking.

    30. jereme

        that bitch still be kicking some trees down.

        she should have been in that wendy’s commercial where they kick trees for no apparent reason other than it is tuesday and trees exist to be kicked by brick shit house blond bitches bred for tree kicking.