April 1st, 2009 / 2:20 pm
Haut or not
Haut or Not: Giancarlo Ditrapano
Finally — a rejection letter to (instead of from) the editor of New York Tyrant.
Dear New York Tyrant,
Thank you for submitting your book shelf to Haut or Not. Unfortunately, it’s not what we are looking for right now. We’re tying to go in a ‘maybe life doesn’t completely suck’ direction, and all your books have a ‘life completely sucks’ feel to it. Sartre was nauseous; Faulkner’s mother was a fish; Kafka’s Czech was never in the mail; never let naked boys hang out on an island; never let an alcoholic hang out under a volcano — yada yada we get the point. Cheever and Saunders offer jestful energy and enthusiasm, but then you go fuck it up with freaking Johnny Got His Gun — what every Metallica fan just had to read, huh? Grim-face Nietzsche is a redundancy, and what’s up with the Banville – O’Hara – Bowles ‘middle-aged man discontent’ trio? You too can stick your face at some foreign wind, but it’s not gonna help your hair situation. It would’ve been funny to see Isaac Babel next to Racial Hygiene, but you had to restrain yourself didn’t you? Also, you didn’t double-space your books, include a self-addressed stamped crate, or give us your BEST THREE BOOKS. Simultaneous submissions are not allowed, and you’re simultaneously being a prick and a pansy. Feel free to submit again, after you get some hope for the human race (which includes the Jews you Nazi).
Rating: Not
Tags: giancarlo ditrapano, new york tyrant
Right the fuck on.
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Except I liked Sartre, but that’s not what I’m right-onning.
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The Dwarf makes it haut. Sorry, Jimmy. Also, I thought I was the only person on the planet who’d read Angels.
Gian is 31.
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Don’t rash on Sartre. Old Jean-Paul was one of the most influential thinkers of the twentieth century and he and Camus were the only “philosophers” (whatever the fuck that means) that seemed capable of writing good fiction.
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sartre’s corpse is laughing at people who “defend” him.
life does suck.
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April 1st, 2009 / 4:35 pmNathan (Nate) Tyree—
that is beautiful, apropos, and *correct*
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This is an impressive collection of white male fiction.
Angels, however, is Johnson’s best book, by far.
You guys need to make these photos clickable to a larger photo, I am an old man of 86 years & my eyesight is very poor.
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http://htmlgiant.com/?p=6366&cpage=1#comment-11408
hahahahahhhhhhhh fuckers
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April 1st, 2009 / 5:34 pmPHM—
Alrighty then.
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April 1st, 2009 / 5:41 pmgena—
i knew you’d have something smart to say, paul. and all your pictures on myspace are as pretentious as can be.
why don’t you go enjoy being 21 and go get drunk instead of being an asshole to everyone here? can’t you have sympathy for a 17 year old? after all, isn’t your little girlfriend 17 or 18?
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April 1st, 2009 / 5:48 pmPHM—
Oh wow, this is awesome. You’re the first one ever to bring up Beth in public. She’s not my little girlfriend. Ask her. She’s with some fucking annoying guy or another and just oscillates to me when she is bored. I don’t know when she’ll stop or whatever, but I got tired of waiting around for her a long time ago. All I said here was “Alrighty then.” If you look at your little linky you’ll see I got quite a bit more rude, really flew off the handle though I’m not quite sorry, over there. I think it’s awesome this about to turn into Jerry Springer maybe. Or something. I guess pretentious is your way of saying hot. And for that I thank you. Oh don’t bother to correct yourself now…
April 1st, 2009 / 5:57 pmgena—
yes, i read what you had to say. thank you for taking the time to reply to me when i wasn’t even talking to/about you. although, i do not like you at all. so please leave me alone. i don’t feel like arguing with you. i spoke what was on my mind. i can’t do that? you had some mean shit to say to me. i was sticking up for a friend and speaking my mind. you were just being mean. i would appreciate it if you would stop insulting my personal life (like school) now. you don’t know what i go through, but i’m pretty sure if you did, you wouldn’t care at all. i have yet to see you say nice things to people. i’m sorry you have to be mean to good people.
and good job being an ass to yet another young girl.
April 1st, 2009 / 6:01 pmPHM—
Alrighty then.
(“And somehow, that wasn’t all,” he predicted, laughing.)
April 2nd, 2009 / 4:18 pmClapper—
This has to do with this thread how, exactly?
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April 2nd, 2009 / 5:51 pmjereme—
HAHAHA! i know this is bad but…
i could totally hear your effeminate pissy whine voice when i read this. it made me laugh. thank you.
heya duh ayev, what relevance did your initial asshole comment have in relation to that thread?
just drop it. who cares.
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April 2nd, 2009 / 6:26 pmClapper—
Apparently, Gena still cares, or she wouldn’t have gone out of her way to direct our attention back to those comments.
Congrats, sincerely, on your eShame win.
And hey, because I was curious whether the two of you did much writing (it didn’t seem like it based on your comments here), I googled and found ya both in some nice pubs. Congrats on those as well.
PS Gena, I’m not sure which degrees you were referring to in the original eShame. I’m not an MFA by any stretch of the imagination.
April 2nd, 2009 / 6:27 pmClapper—
Oh, and you’re welcome for the laugh.
please stop
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“No writer can justify ruthlessness for the sake of his work because being human to the fullest possible extent is what his work demands of him.”
-May Sarton
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Thank you. I needed that. And to make things worse, I sold 75% of my books to the Strand. These are the ones I kept.
One thing: Has anyone here read Racial Hygiene? It is so very good. There is a chapter on how to get rid of Asians which is my fave.
Thanks, Jimmy. Now I have a reason to break your face when we finally meet.
til then,
Gian
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Jimmy,
On second thought, you kind of look like this chubby little Asian kid that used to stop by my apartment for poppers and cock-sucking. So, depending on my mood on the future evening when we cross paths, you will either get your ass handed to you by me, OR I might just spin you around, drop your trousers and eat what I first considered handing you. Either way, a great time to look forward to!!
I love chubby Asian men,
Gian
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April 2nd, 2009 / 1:51 amJimmy Chen—
ass i lay dying bro
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April 2nd, 2009 / 11:07 ampr—
You two make me happy.
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i <3 gian
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I prefer the Lydia Davis translation of Swann’s Way… that looks like the Montcrieff, right?
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