Mean
HTMLGIANT Presents: Coal in Your Stocking
The other night at Poison Girl, I met a poet named Christian, an aquaintance of Gene Morgan. Christian was out for the reading and also celebrating his having been accepted to the program at The New School. During a hiccup in the conversation, Christian asked about HTMLGIANT, saying he hadn’t read it since Secret Santa. I asked him why, and he said something like, “Well, I feel ashamed of myself. I never sent off a Secret Santa gift. I couldn’t figure out what to get her.”
So I told him he should still do it, he had time, why not send off a gift? It’s okay if you can’t figure out what to get her, I said. The idea is to send a surprise, something you admire and want to share with someone else.
Yes, he said. I understand, he said. Yes, I should, he said. He said he was sorry, and he wrote this on the back of a receipt to show his sorrow. He said that I should post it for everyone to see:
Despite this apology (is it sincere? can it be sincere with three exclamation points? the underlining? the ‘ya’ll’? the cursing? I don’t know), I sadly doubt he will ever send off the gift, though I hope he will prove me wrong.
Regardless, I’d like to present him with HTMLGIANT’s first ever Coal In Your Stocking award.
Christian, for your lack of effort, I say congratulations! Good luck next year in school, and while I hope the best for you, I also have to say this: may you receive lots of coal in your stocking during the holidays.
Now I throw you to the wolves.
I know all of this happened a while ago, but I can’t help but post this last bit: those of you who still haven’t received gifts, I’m sorry. Those who took part, but didn’t send off a gift, please please do that.
Tags: Secret Santa
That bastard. Coal is too good.
That bastard. Coal is too good.
The person he had to buy for couldn’t have been any more difficult than the person I bought for. Send something, man. Pick a random book from one of the haut or not pics and send that.
The person he had to buy for couldn’t have been any more difficult than the person I bought for. Send something, man. Pick a random book from one of the haut or not pics and send that.
leave it up to a poet….
leave it up to a poet….
xian is my good friend, but he definitely deserves this award. if he sends the secret santa gift now, can he be redeemed in print (online text)?
i received one of the books my person slated for me. whoever it was (i forget) did a terrible job of packaging the books and one of the two was lost in the mail. someone out there owes me a copy of bob, or man on boat.
xian is my good friend, but he definitely deserves this award. if he sends the secret santa gift now, can he be redeemed in print (online text)?
i received one of the books my person slated for me. whoever it was (i forget) did a terrible job of packaging the books and one of the two was lost in the mail. someone out there owes me a copy of bob, or man on boat.
ryan,
my garnishments are over. i have cash flow again in 2 weeks.
send me the info of the person who did not get books.
i will buy books.
and let me know about that other thing (i sent you an email about).
the sorry y’all picture thing reminded me of the now defunct ryan/christy call y’all posts.
i miss those..
ryan,
my garnishments are over. i have cash flow again in 2 weeks.
send me the info of the person who did not get books.
i will buy books.
and let me know about that other thing (i sent you an email about).
the sorry y’all picture thing reminded me of the now defunct ryan/christy call y’all posts.
i miss those..
yeah i figured some houston people would know of him
im half joking in this post, it was good to meet him at pg
of course ill redeem him if he sends the award
yeah i figured some houston people would know of him
im half joking in this post, it was good to meet him at pg
of course ill redeem him if he sends the award
ill email you yo
ill email you yo
Correction: I write poetry AND prose y’all.
I will send her something soon. Perhaps a gift basket, too. I didn’t know you were going to scan the note. The three exclamation marks make me come like a tool, I think. Or is it the “y’all”?
But I accept the award and I dedicate it too baby Jesus!
Correction: I write poetry AND prose y’all.
I will send her something soon. Perhaps a gift basket, too. I didn’t know you were going to scan the note. The three exclamation marks make me come like a tool, I think. Or is it the “y’all”?
But I accept the award and I dedicate it too baby Jesus!
oh i thought you wanted me to totally post the note?
oh i thought you wanted me to totally post the note?
the ya’ll part is the super douche move i think.
the ya’ll part is the super douche move i think.
Your only redemption is a subscription to the NY TYRANT for 8 issues.
You did this to yourself.
Your only redemption is a subscription to the NY TYRANT for 8 issues.
You did this to yourself.