This site lists how Twilight might go if written by a list of other novelists…noteworthy remix styles include Murakami:

“Bella has sex with Edward, who is half a ghost. Jacob is a talking cat. Most of the prose is given over to descriptions of Bella making pasta.”

and Cormac McCarthy:

“In the opening scene, Edward dashes Bella’s head against a rock and rapes her corpse. Then he and Jacob take off on an unexplained rampage through the West.”

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