December 24th, 2009 / 11:19 am
 Snippets
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What is the most nervous you have ever been while giving a reading?

46 Comments

  1. December 24th, 2009 / 6:36 pm Nate—

      I’m nervous about reading with Daniel Bailey on January 2. He says he wants to make a baby.

  2. December 24th, 2009 / 2:36 pm Nate—

      I’m nervous about reading with Daniel Bailey on January 2. He says he wants to make a baby.

  3. December 24th, 2009 / 6:45 pm Tim Jones-Yelvington—

      I was reading at an open mic at a boring academic writing conference at DePaul and decided I was going to read my sexually-explicit-ish piece about Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston, which includes, among other things, rape fantasies and intimations of child abuse, but there were a lot of older people there, and I started getting really terrified right before reading they would be deeply offended, but I felt like I would be ashamed of myself if, after deciding to read this piece, I switched to something more palatable, so I went ahead and read it, and my hand shook the entire time, and what most scared me was imagining someone might come up after and ask me why I was further exploiting these youth who the media had already so exploited, and I wouldn’t be able to articulate why I didn’t feel it was exploitative to exploit them as I had. Of course nobody said anything.

  4. December 24th, 2009 / 2:45 pm Tim Jones-Yelvington—

      I was reading at an open mic at a boring academic writing conference at DePaul and decided I was going to read my sexually-explicit-ish piece about Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston, which includes, among other things, rape fantasies and intimations of child abuse, but there were a lot of older people there, and I started getting really terrified right before reading they would be deeply offended, but I felt like I would be ashamed of myself if, after deciding to read this piece, I switched to something more palatable, so I went ahead and read it, and my hand shook the entire time, and what most scared me was imagining someone might come up after and ask me why I was further exploiting these youth who the media had already so exploited, and I wouldn’t be able to articulate why I didn’t feel it was exploitative to exploit them as I had. Of course nobody said anything.

  5. December 24th, 2009 / 8:18 pm I. Fontana—

      I haven’t done that many but I was feeling very confident and went on in front of a large audience and just froze. I mean I absolutely couldn’t speak. I moved some papers around and people were beginning to get restless when I somehow managed to get the first word or 2 out and then I was okay. But this has made wary about LIFE.

  6. December 24th, 2009 / 4:18 pm I. Fontana—

      I haven’t done that many but I was feeling very confident and went on in front of a large audience and just froze. I mean I absolutely couldn’t speak. I moved some papers around and people were beginning to get restless when I somehow managed to get the first word or 2 out and then I was okay. But this has made wary about LIFE.

  7. December 24th, 2009 / 8:21 pm alec niedenthal—

      At a sort of house party/reading thing, I read in front of what seemed to me like billions of people from my school. Before I read, I paced around outside in circles and said “I wish I were dead” repeatedly. I was physically trembling. It ended up going okay.

  8. December 24th, 2009 / 4:21 pm alec niedenthal—

      At a sort of house party/reading thing, I read in front of what seemed to me like billions of people from my school. Before I read, I paced around outside in circles and said “I wish I were dead” repeatedly. I was physically trembling. It ended up going okay.

  9. December 24th, 2009 / 8:55 pm Sean—

      Do you do anything–cough, cough–before a reading to chill?

      I ALWAYS drink one huge beer, period.

  10. December 24th, 2009 / 4:55 pm Sean—

      Do you do anything–cough, cough–before a reading to chill?

      I ALWAYS drink one huge beer, period.

  11. December 24th, 2009 / 9:06 pm aaron—

      yeah, i MUCH prefer to read drunk. in fact, it feels downright weird and awkward to read sober.

  12. December 24th, 2009 / 5:06 pm aaron—

      yeah, i MUCH prefer to read drunk. in fact, it feels downright weird and awkward to read sober.

  13. December 24th, 2009 / 5:07 pm shaun—

      Drinking before reading is usually a good idea (unless you’re a mean drunk), but how much you SHOULD drink depends on when everything becomes fuzzy enough to hamper your cognitive/linguistic functions. Yes, giving readings while hammered can be fun, but if you do something embarassing, it’ll suck a lot more because you didn’t cut yourself off at the bar. It’s always better to stumble over your words because you’re nervous than to mess up because you’re too drunk.

      This relates to my most nervous moment when I was reading in front of most of the English dept at an awards ceremony, which I suspected I could not be drunk for. I had also done quite a bit of editing of the piece I was reading, but forgot my copy and had to read from the print version in the magazine, and I wanted to cringe quite a few times while reading. Of course, an hour later, I was very drunk.

  14. December 24th, 2009 / 9:07 pm shaun—

      Drinking before reading is usually a good idea (unless you’re a mean drunk), but how much you SHOULD drink depends on when everything becomes fuzzy enough to hamper your cognitive/linguistic functions. Yes, giving readings while hammered can be fun, but if you do something embarassing, it’ll suck a lot more because you didn’t cut yourself off at the bar. It’s always better to stumble over your words because you’re nervous than to mess up because you’re too drunk.

      This relates to my most nervous moment when I was reading in front of most of the English dept at an awards ceremony, which I suspected I could not be drunk for. I had also done quite a bit of editing of the piece I was reading, but forgot my copy and had to read from the print version in the magazine, and I wanted to cringe quite a few times while reading. Of course, an hour later, I was very drunk.

  15. December 24th, 2009 / 10:53 pm mike young—

      i was nervous before and during the AWP train reading because i constantly kept thinking “shit this is all going to fall apart and be the stupidest thing any of these people have ever been a part of”

  16. December 24th, 2009 / 10:53 pm mike young—

      this was a reading on the El Train at AWP Chicago 2009.. just realized that not everyone might know what “AWP train reading” means, duh

  17. December 24th, 2009 / 6:53 pm mike young—

      i was nervous before and during the AWP train reading because i constantly kept thinking “shit this is all going to fall apart and be the stupidest thing any of these people have ever been a part of”

  18. December 24th, 2009 / 6:53 pm mike young—

      this was a reading on the El Train at AWP Chicago 2009.. just realized that not everyone might know what “AWP train reading” means, duh

  19. December 24th, 2009 / 11:51 pm dan—

      i like to drink a forty before reading.

  20. December 24th, 2009 / 7:51 pm dan—

      i like to drink a forty before reading.

  21. December 24th, 2009 / 11:52 pm dan—

      everyone together will make a giant baby that we will raise in turns.

  22. December 24th, 2009 / 11:52 pm isaac estep—

      I wasn’t giving one, but one time I was late to a Ray Gonzalez reading and a professor let me into the back room that was directly behind the wall he was reading in front of. I was extremely nervous that I would cause some sort of noise and be found out.

      AWP be was ridiculous. If anybody went to the shitty dance party with the “free” bar the last night I was the jerk yelling “where the party at, can I bring my gat.”

  23. December 24th, 2009 / 7:52 pm dan—

      everyone together will make a giant baby that we will raise in turns.

  24. December 24th, 2009 / 7:52 pm isaac estep—

      I wasn’t giving one, but one time I was late to a Ray Gonzalez reading and a professor let me into the back room that was directly behind the wall he was reading in front of. I was extremely nervous that I would cause some sort of noise and be found out.

      AWP be was ridiculous. If anybody went to the shitty dance party with the “free” bar the last night I was the jerk yelling “where the party at, can I bring my gat.”

  25. December 25th, 2009 / 1:23 am Nate—

      This makes me very nervous.

  26. December 24th, 2009 / 9:23 pm Nate—

      This makes me very nervous.

  27. December 25th, 2009 / 6:00 pm dan—

      the most nervous i’ve been was reading in oakland with chelsea martin. the reason i was nervous was that we read with comedians in an office space. also, i was sober.

  28. December 25th, 2009 / 2:00 pm dan—

      the most nervous i’ve been was reading in oakland with chelsea martin. the reason i was nervous was that we read with comedians in an office space. also, i was sober.

  29. December 25th, 2009 / 2:24 pm Laura Ellen Scott—

      I tend to curse in my opening remarks, but I don’t consciously feel nervous. I only get nervous for other readers, like the time I sat next to Erlewine on a conference panel and Molly G asked us all to read one of our flashes (Joe Young also on the panel). DE pulls out this scrap of paper with half the words scratched out like a government redaction, so I thought he was a goner. He performed beautifully, though.

  30. December 25th, 2009 / 6:24 pm Laura Ellen Scott—

      I tend to curse in my opening remarks, but I don’t consciously feel nervous. I only get nervous for other readers, like the time I sat next to Erlewine on a conference panel and Molly G asked us all to read one of our flashes (Joe Young also on the panel). DE pulls out this scrap of paper with half the words scratched out like a government redaction, so I thought he was a goner. He performed beautifully, though.

  31. December 25th, 2009 / 6:52 pm Mike Meginnis—

      I was drunk at a friend’s house and I read my short-short about a baby absorbing another baby in the womb. I felt like an idiot. I just wanted to be heard and loved.

  32. December 25th, 2009 / 2:52 pm Mike Meginnis—

      I was drunk at a friend’s house and I read my short-short about a baby absorbing another baby in the womb. I felt like an idiot. I just wanted to be heard and loved.

  33. December 25th, 2009 / 9:07 pm david erlewine—

      ha, thanks, LES. I always think I’m a goner. Merry Christmas.

  34. December 25th, 2009 / 9:07 pm david erlewine—

      i hate public speaking more than Nazis

      i’ve only done it with the help of alcohol or prostitutes

  35. December 25th, 2009 / 5:07 pm david erlewine—

      ha, thanks, LES. I always think I’m a goner. Merry Christmas.

  36. December 25th, 2009 / 5:07 pm david erlewine—

      i hate public speaking more than Nazis

      i’ve only done it with the help of alcohol or prostitutes

  37. December 26th, 2009 / 7:30 am rachel—

      just adderall for me

  38. December 26th, 2009 / 3:30 am rachel—

      just adderall for me

  39. December 26th, 2009 / 11:00 pm h—

      i used to have to read in workshop (*workshop* for fuck’s sake) and once got so obliterated before it i had to leave in the middle of it to vomit. another time i fainted. now i just take a xanax to keep my hands from shaking and avoid reading as much as possible.

  40. December 26th, 2009 / 7:00 pm h—

      i used to have to read in workshop (*workshop* for fuck’s sake) and once got so obliterated before it i had to leave in the middle of it to vomit. another time i fainted. now i just take a xanax to keep my hands from shaking and avoid reading as much as possible.

  41. December 27th, 2009 / 5:50 pm Merzmensch—

      The aftermath is the thing, I’m worrying about.

      I actually want to disappear after reading. I don’t know why, but the questions of people are making me paranoid.

      One time there was one dude who begun discussing with me about quantum theory after I was reading a poem about Odysseus. I was hoping in this moment to become a part of interieur or to be taken away by a waiter as a wine glass.

  42. December 27th, 2009 / 1:50 pm Merzmensch—

      The aftermath is the thing, I’m worrying about.

      I actually want to disappear after reading. I don’t know why, but the questions of people are making me paranoid.

      One time there was one dude who begun discussing with me about quantum theory after I was reading a poem about Odysseus. I was hoping in this moment to become a part of interieur or to be taken away by a waiter as a wine glass.

  43. December 27th, 2009 / 6:15 pm mimi—

      I like the things you say here and I like the way you say them.

  44. December 27th, 2009 / 2:15 pm mimi—

      I like the things you say here and I like the way you say them.

  45. December 27th, 2009 / 10:30 pm Merzmensch—

      Thank you mimi

  46. December 27th, 2009 / 6:30 pm Merzmensch—

      Thank you mimi