March 21st, 2010 / 3:17 pm
Snippets

What books have actually gotten you wet or given you an erection?

152 Comments

  1. anon

      naked lunch

  2. anon

      naked lunch

  3. anon

      fantasy novels

  4. anon

      dennis cooper

  5. anon

      fantasy novels

  6. anon

      dennis cooper

  7. ZZZZIPP

      THIS IS AN UNFAIR QUESTION. WHEN ZZZZIPP WAS JUST A WEE ZZZZIPPPY BOY, NEARLY EVERYTHING GAVE ZZZZIPP AN ERECTION. READING THE MENU AT DAIRY QUEEN COULD GIVE ZZZZIPP AN ERECTION IN THE RIGHT CIRCUMSTANCES.

      ZZZZIPP HAS NEVER TOLD THIS TO ANYONE BEFORE, BUT EVEN THE POSTER OF CAREER STOLEN BASE LEADER RICKEY HENDERSON ABOVE ZZZIPP’S BED COULD GIVE ZZZIPP A ZZZZZZZIPPP

  8. ZZZZIPP

      THIS IS AN UNFAIR QUESTION. WHEN ZZZZIPP WAS JUST A WEE ZZZZIPPPY BOY, NEARLY EVERYTHING GAVE ZZZZIPP AN ERECTION. READING THE MENU AT DAIRY QUEEN COULD GIVE ZZZZIPP AN ERECTION IN THE RIGHT CIRCUMSTANCES.

      ZZZZIPP HAS NEVER TOLD THIS TO ANYONE BEFORE, BUT EVEN THE POSTER OF CAREER STOLEN BASE LEADER RICKEY HENDERSON ABOVE ZZZIPP’S BED COULD GIVE ZZZIPP A ZZZZZZZIPPP

  9. Blake Butler

      which cooper. or all? and what fantasy

  10. Blake Butler

      which cooper. or all? and what fantasy

  11. Sean Doyle

      That poster of Rickey gave Rickey an erection, too.

      There is a collection of amazing Rickey Henderson stories out there – this is one of my favorites:

      San Diego GM Kevin Towers was trying to contact Rickey at a nearby hotel. He knew Henderson always used fake names to avoid the press, fans, etc. He was trying to think like Rickey and after several attempts; he was able to get Henderson on the phone.

      Rickey had checked in under Richard Pryor.

  12. Sean Doyle

      That poster of Rickey gave Rickey an erection, too.

      There is a collection of amazing Rickey Henderson stories out there – this is one of my favorites:

      San Diego GM Kevin Towers was trying to contact Rickey at a nearby hotel. He knew Henderson always used fake names to avoid the press, fans, etc. He was trying to think like Rickey and after several attempts; he was able to get Henderson on the phone.

      Rickey had checked in under Richard Pryor.

  13. ZZZZIPP

      IF ON A WINTER’S NIGHT A TRAVELLER TO BE MORE SPECIFIC, MOST RECENTLY

  14. ZZZZIPP

      IF ON A WINTER’S NIGHT A TRAVELLER TO BE MORE SPECIFIC, MOST RECENTLY

  15. ZZZZIPP

      ZZZZIPP’S FAVOURITE STORY ABOUT RICKEY HENDERSON IS WHEN HE ASKED JOHN OLERUD WHY HE WORE A BATTING HELMET WHILE FIELDING. HE WAS CURIOUS BECAUSE ONE OF HIS TEAMMATES HAD PLAYED LIKE THAT IN TORONTO.

      “RICKEY,” SAID OLERUD, “THAT WAS ME.”

      BUT THAT STORY NEVER HAPPENED.

  16. ZZZZIPP

      ZZZZIPP’S FAVOURITE STORY ABOUT RICKEY HENDERSON IS WHEN HE ASKED JOHN OLERUD WHY HE WORE A BATTING HELMET WHILE FIELDING. HE WAS CURIOUS BECAUSE ONE OF HIS TEAMMATES HAD PLAYED LIKE THAT IN TORONTO.

      “RICKEY,” SAID OLERUD, “THAT WAS ME.”

      BUT THAT STORY NEVER HAPPENED.

  17. dddddan

      justine – marquis de sade

  18. dddddan

      justine – marquis de sade

  19. ZZZZIPP

      NO, WAIT, IT WAS “GEORGE III: AMERICA’S LAST KING”.

  20. ZZZZIPP

      NO, WAIT, IT WAS “GEORGE III: AMERICA’S LAST KING”.

  21. ZZZZIPP

      OH, ACTUALLY I FORGOT: IT WAS “A BRIEF HISTORY OF TIME”

  22. ZZZZIPP

      OH, ACTUALLY I FORGOT: IT WAS “A BRIEF HISTORY OF TIME”

  23. Evan Lavender-Smith

      THE OXFORD BOOK OF DEATH, ed. D.J. Enright

  24. Evan Lavender-Smith

      THE OXFORD BOOK OF DEATH, ed. D.J. Enright

  25. Ani

      First Sweet Valley High, and then I think something in Tales of Ordinary Madness, but more recently a story called I AM THE DICTATOR really does it for me in a very wrong way.

  26. Ani

      First Sweet Valley High, and then I think something in Tales of Ordinary Madness, but more recently a story called I AM THE DICTATOR really does it for me in a very wrong way.

  27. dave erlewine

      Flowers in the attic

      what has two thumbs and no sister? this guy

  28. dave erlewine

      Flowers in the attic

      what has two thumbs and no sister? this guy

  29. Tim Ramick

      The Blind Owl got my shadow up

  30. Sean Doyle

      The incest scene in Irving’s THE HOTEL NEW HAMPSHIRE certainly made me feel “funny” when I first read it.

  31. Tim Ramick

      The Blind Owl got my shadow up

  32. Sean Doyle

      The incest scene in Irving’s THE HOTEL NEW HAMPSHIRE certainly made me feel “funny” when I first read it.

  33. stephen

      i didn’t get an erection really, but the sex scenes in “eat when you feel sad” made me feel ‘a lil tingly’ because they were so true-to-life and made it easy for me to ‘picture it’ and sort of remember what various experiences felt like.

  34. stephen

      i didn’t get an erection really, but the sex scenes in “eat when you feel sad” made me feel ‘a lil tingly’ because they were so true-to-life and made it easy for me to ‘picture it’ and sort of remember what various experiences felt like.

  35. Nathan (Nate) Tyree

      Lovely.

  36. Nathan (Nate) Tyree

      Lovely.

  37. Nathan (Nate) Tyree

      Lolita didn’t get me hard, but it did effect me.

  38. Nathan (Nate) Tyree

      Lolita didn’t get me hard, but it did effect me.

  39. jonny ross

      the denial of death by ernest becker. for real.

  40. jonny ross

      the denial of death by ernest becker. for real.

  41. magickmagick

      i’m prone to reading in my bed with mesh shorts on and have a hyper-active sex drive, so basically anything even slightly erotic can get me hard. recently: Roee Rosen’s Justine Frank: Sweet Sweat, various erotic comix, Alina Reyes’ Behind Closed Doors, Apollinaire’s Eleven Thousand Rods.

  42. magickmagick

      i’m prone to reading in my bed with mesh shorts on and have a hyper-active sex drive, so basically anything even slightly erotic can get me hard. recently: Roee Rosen’s Justine Frank: Sweet Sweat, various erotic comix, Alina Reyes’ Behind Closed Doors, Apollinaire’s Eleven Thousand Rods.

  43. Elle Noir

      Anaïs Nin & Virginie Despentes. French chicks do it for me, apparently.

  44. Elle Noir

      Anaïs Nin & Virginie Despentes. French chicks do it for me, apparently.

  45. zachary german

      vox by nicholson baker

  46. zachary german

      vox by nicholson baker

  47. Jason Cook

      That incesty-rapey scene at the end of 100 YEARS OF SOLITUDE.

      Wrong and hot at the same time.

  48. Jason Cook

      That incesty-rapey scene at the end of 100 YEARS OF SOLITUDE.

      Wrong and hot at the same time.

  49. Gian

      Edmund White’s writing has been known to strike a certain chord with me.

  50. Gian

      Edmund White’s writing has been known to strike a certain chord with me.

  51. Gian

      I jacked it like three times while reading Beloved.

  52. Gian

      I jacked it like three times while reading Beloved.

  53. Gian

      Herman Hesse. Most of his books are full-on boner jams.

  54. Gian

      Herman Hesse. Most of his books are full-on boner jams.

  55. reynard

      too many to count on one hand

  56. reynard

      too many to count on one hand

  57. jh

      Atlas Shrugged

  58. jh

      Atlas Shrugged

  59. JW Veldhoen

      American Psycho got me wet *and* gave me an erection. Ditto ‘Under the Roofs of Paris’.

  60. JW Veldhoen

      American Psycho got me wet *and* gave me an erection. Ditto ‘Under the Roofs of Paris’.

  61. JW Veldhoen

      The latest was ‘Video Green’ by Chris Krauss (big time).

  62. JW Veldhoen

      The latest was ‘Video Green’ by Chris Krauss (big time).

  63. alexis

      Jeanette Winterson’s The Passion.

  64. alexis

      Jeanette Winterson’s The Passion.

  65. Kurt

      Alan Moore’s Lost Girls

  66. Kurt

      Alan Moore’s Lost Girls

  67. damon

      what does it mean to “get wet”?

  68. Kate

      angela carter’s fairytales. duras’ the lover and ravishing of lol stein. dennis cooper. kathy acker blood and guts (acker makes the janey/daddy scenes incredibly hot). anais nin’s incest journal. tropic of cancer. juliette and philosophy of the bedroom. story of o. story of the eye. lolita. piano teacher.

  69. damon

      what does it mean to “get wet”?

  70. Kate

      angela carter’s fairytales. duras’ the lover and ravishing of lol stein. dennis cooper. kathy acker blood and guts (acker makes the janey/daddy scenes incredibly hot). anais nin’s incest journal. tropic of cancer. juliette and philosophy of the bedroom. story of o. story of the eye. lolita. piano teacher.

  71. magick mike

      your taste makes me want to be your friend

  72. People from Mars

      We here at Mars fake all of our erections, but in terms of books, please know that everything David Foster Wallace wrote gave us real erections.

  73. magick mike

      your taste makes me want to be your friend

  74. People from Mars

      We here at Mars fake all of our erections, but in terms of books, please know that everything David Foster Wallace wrote gave us real erections.

  75. jonathan

      story of the eye, bataille.

  76. Janey Smith

      George Bataille, Story of the Eye. Kathy Acker, Blood and Guts in High School. Sophie Jabes, Alice, the Sausage. Charlotte Roche, Wetlands. Jill Alexander Essbaum, Harlot. Jesus Ignacio Aldapuerta, The Eyes. Samuel R. Delany, Hogg. Dennis Cooper, Frisk. Sade, 120 Days of Sodom.

  77. jonathan

      story of the eye, bataille.

  78. Janey Smith

      George Bataille, Story of the Eye. Kathy Acker, Blood and Guts in High School. Sophie Jabes, Alice, the Sausage. Charlotte Roche, Wetlands. Jill Alexander Essbaum, Harlot. Jesus Ignacio Aldapuerta, The Eyes. Samuel R. Delany, Hogg. Dennis Cooper, Frisk. Sade, 120 Days of Sodom.

  79. ZZZZIPP

      ZZZZIPP HAS BEEN TO MARS

      THERE IS SOME GOOD WEATHER THERE

  80. ZZZZIPP

      ZZZZIPP HAS BEEN TO MARS

      THERE IS SOME GOOD WEATHER THERE

  81. peter

      harrison’s Warlock

  82. peter

      harrison’s Warlock

  83. Casey

      Ditto Bataille, Story of the Eye Janey and a good rest of list there.

  84. Casey

      Ditto Bataille, Story of the Eye Janey and a good rest of list there.

  85. anon

      all cooper. all fantasy.

  86. anon

      all cooper. all fantasy.

  87. Paul

      Craig Thompson’s Blankets (if graphic novels count)

      I like to listen to Miranda July’s audiobooks, too . . .

  88. Paul

      Craig Thompson’s Blankets (if graphic novels count)

      I like to listen to Miranda July’s audiobooks, too . . .

  89. People from Mars

      We here at Mars also get the occasional erection from NOON.

  90. People from Mars

      We here at Mars also get the occasional erection from NOON.

  91. brittany wallace

      kitchen confidential

  92. brittany wallace

      kitchen confidential

  93. Jesse Hudson

      You took the choices right out of my mind. Especially Hogg, 120 Days, and The Eyes. There were several scenes in Juliette and Philosophy in the Boudoir that were erotic as well.

  94. Jesse Hudson

      You took the choices right out of my mind. Especially Hogg, 120 Days, and The Eyes. There were several scenes in Juliette and Philosophy in the Boudoir that were erotic as well.

  95. zusya
  96. zusya
  97. zusya

      howdy quaid.

      /pseudonyms are phun.

  98. zusya

      howdy quaid.

      /pseudonyms are phun.

  99. keith birthday

      The sex scenes from Bohumil Hrabal’s novels, specifically “I Served the King of England”

  100. keith birthday

      The sex scenes from Bohumil Hrabal’s novels, specifically “I Served the King of England”

  101. Hank

      The Savage Detectives. What a fun little book that was.

  102. Hank

      The Savage Detectives. What a fun little book that was.

  103. Merzmensch

      Wittgenstein.
      A mental erection, so to say.

  104. Merzmensch

      Wittgenstein.
      A mental erection, so to say.

  105. jheorgge taylor

      trocchi’s ‘helen of desire’, ‘story of the eye’ definitely, lydia lunch’s ‘paradoxia’, mirbeau’s ‘the torture garden’.

  106. jheorgge taylor

      trocchi’s ‘helen of desire’, ‘story of the eye’ definitely, lydia lunch’s ‘paradoxia’, mirbeau’s ‘the torture garden’.

  107. Catherine Lacey

      nicholson baker in general….
      I mean his sex scenes, not him as a human being….

  108. Catherine Lacey

      nicholson baker in general….
      I mean his sex scenes, not him as a human being….

  109. Catherine Lacey

      zing!

  110. Catherine Lacey

      zing!

  111. ZZZZIPP

      AFTER A WHILE EVERYONE IS TRYING FOR THE LARGEST MENTAL ERECTION

  112. ZZZZIPP

      AFTER A WHILE EVERYONE IS TRYING FOR THE LARGEST MENTAL ERECTION

  113. stephen

      lol @ “mesh shorts”… lol

  114. stephen

      lol @ “mesh shorts”… lol

  115. stephen

      lmao

  116. stephen

      lmao

  117. stephen

      *sings* “standing at a swedish festival, discussing Story of the Eye, discussing Story of the Eye”

  118. stephen

      Blankets didn’t give me an erection, but I found it very sweet and touching

  119. stephen

      *sings* “standing at a swedish festival, discussing Story of the Eye, discussing Story of the Eye”

  120. stephen

      Blankets didn’t give me an erection, but I found it very sweet and touching

  121. stephen

      What Would Anthony Bourdain Do

  122. stephen

      What Would Anthony Bourdain Do

  123. stephen

      Awesome book. Did have some pretty sexy sex scenes, now that I think about it. Seems like that one guy and girl in the book were coming like 10 times per session

  124. stephen

      Awesome book. Did have some pretty sexy sex scenes, now that I think about it. Seems like that one guy and girl in the book were coming like 10 times per session

  125. dave e

      thank you, Nate

  126. dave e

      thank you, Nate

  127. Michael Filippone

      Finnegans Wank

  128. Michael Filippone

      Finnegans Wank

  129. Paul

      Yeah, it didn’t give me an erection either.

      Maybe it gave me one of those “sensual” / “sweet and touching” metaphysical kind of erections.

      You know . . . I could have said “If You Give A Mouse A Cookie” or the always steamy “If You Give A Moose A Muffin”

      Why is it that every time you and I communicate via html giant, we end up talking about stiff cocks?

      @#$%

      . . . Miranda July is hot!

  130. Paul

      Yeah, it didn’t give me an erection either.

      Maybe it gave me one of those “sensual” / “sweet and touching” metaphysical kind of erections.

      You know . . . I could have said “If You Give A Mouse A Cookie” or the always steamy “If You Give A Moose A Muffin”

      Why is it that every time you and I communicate via html giant, we end up talking about stiff cocks?

      @#$%

      . . . Miranda July is hot!

  131. Terrance

      A Sport and a Pastime by James Salter

      You know, THAT scene.

  132. Terrance

      A Sport and a Pastime by James Salter

      You know, THAT scene.

  133. miette

      So I read White Noise a long time ago, when I was just starting to really understand what Getting Wet was all about. I mean, at the time I was reading Anais Nin and Nabokov to really turn me red, but there’s that scene early in White Noise where Jack comes across his stepdaughter practising for an Event. I think she was just lying down on the ground, right? (Boy, I should really re-read that.) And my god, I have no idea what THAT was all about, but let’s just say it called for a very long shower.

  134. miette

      So I read White Noise a long time ago, when I was just starting to really understand what Getting Wet was all about. I mean, at the time I was reading Anais Nin and Nabokov to really turn me red, but there’s that scene early in White Noise where Jack comes across his stepdaughter practising for an Event. I think she was just lying down on the ground, right? (Boy, I should really re-read that.) And my god, I have no idea what THAT was all about, but let’s just say it called for a very long shower.

  135. Daniel

      James Salter’s A Sport and a Pastime.

      Reading it on the train was brutal..

  136. Daniel

      James Salter’s A Sport and a Pastime.

      Reading it on the train was brutal..

  137. Daniel

      Ah, sorry Terrance – didn’t see you above.

  138. Daniel

      Ah, sorry Terrance – didn’t see you above.

  139. scott o

      blinding light by paul theroux & a sport and a pastime

  140. scott o

      blinding light by paul theroux & a sport and a pastime

  141. Neil

      We did Porn by Zak Smith (who also did the illustrated Gravity’s Rainbow). Also, Kafka on the Shore.

  142. Neil

      We did Porn by Zak Smith (who also did the illustrated Gravity’s Rainbow). Also, Kafka on the Shore.

  143. magick mike

      aldapuerta’s the eyes is one of the best things EVER

  144. magick mike

      aldapuerta’s the eyes is one of the best things EVER

  145. Sean

      Second James Salter’s A Sport and a Pastime. Or I mean third it.

  146. Sean

      Second James Salter’s A Sport and a Pastime. Or I mean third it.

  147. James

      The Swimming-Pool Library by Alan Hollinghurst

  148. James

      The Swimming-Pool Library by Alan Hollinghurst

  149. Rosetta Penn

      Anne Rice

  150. Rosetta Penn

      Anne Rice

  151. ReJoyce

      All books make me hard. I’m always hard though. Books make me harder.

  152. ReJoyce

      All books make me hard. I’m always hard though. Books make me harder.