June 14th, 2010 / 5:28 pm
Snippets

Who is the horniest writer?

188 Comments

  1. Sean

      On the page or when you meet them?

      On the page, Erika Lopez.

  2. Matthew Simmons

      Usually it sort of feels like its me.

  3. jereme

      charles bukowski

  4. Matthew Simmons

      it’s

  5. Michel

      Houellebecq

  6. Blake Butler

      so horny you can’t even punctuate without afterthought

  7. jereme

      also: paula bomer

  8. voorface

      Anna Freud

  9. Nate

      seconded.

  10. James

      Ellroy

  11. rk

      marcel proust

  12. michael

      nick hornby

  13. michael

      i misread the question

  14. magick mike

      i will perhaps second this

  15. Dick

      I’ll hazard a Helen Keller

  16. Paul

      hehe, yes

  17. Juliette

      Ted Hughes.

  18. gene

      barry. henry miller.

  19. Adam

      Not sure, but I’ll bet they’re under 40.

  20. William

      Burroughs

  21. Greg

      Dulli

  22. Prince

      Rogers Nelson III

  23. Bret

      Easton Ellis

  24. L'il

      Kim

  25. Schulyer Prinz

      not a writer.

  26. voorface

      No one found my joke funny, so here’s the real answer: Marquis de Sade

  27. Catherine Lacey

      Nicholson Baker

  28. Bambi A.

      philip roth

  29. alan

      peeper

  30. Sidney

      Sheldon

  31. Harold

      Robbins

  32. Hayden Derk

      Haruki Murakami.

  33. Kristin

      does anyone else sense that Foer is waiting for the right moment to just let a big one go

      Wilmot/de Sade/Beardsley = pretty randy

      but my faves: Verlaine// Genet \\ Rimbaud = a fisty bread dough sexcat sandwich + prison.

  34. Lily Hoang

      Bolano sexes it up.

  35. jereme

      i wonder if dr. ruth ever did x

  36. Stu

      I will third this.

  37. mark

      vollmann

  38. marshall

      tao lin

  39. marshall

      michael crichton

  40. Craig Davis

      To me “horny” is not the same as erotic or hypersexual.

      “They call it horny because its devilish, now see we dead wrong…” So its not eros that’s the operative idea in horniness, but rather the rub of desire against guilt. So its got to be a big-C Catholic. And because its an impish impulse, because it derives more pleasure from the play than the game, its a poet. And because its potential for excitement is predicated upon a set of rules designed to be ignored, its an American. And because its power stems from the larger cultural quiet around the question, its a midwesterner. And because its equal parts tactile curiosity and emotional disquiet, its a man.

      Ergo, John Berryman.

  41. zzzzzipp

      NO WAY NOT MICHAEL

      ALTHOUGH THE THAILAND STORY IN “TRAVELS” WAS PRETTY RACEY, HE DID SEEM TO WANT TO DISTANCE HIMSELF FROM THAT UNDERAGE BROTHEL HE VISITED

  42. zzzzzipp

      FOR HOURS

  43. zzzzzipp

      HOUELLEBECQ IS A GOOD ONE

  44. evlav

      chabon: so horny he loses sight of his sexual orientation.

  45. zzzzzipp

      ZZZZZZIPP WANTED TO SAY MARQUIS DE SADE OR J.G. BALLARD BUT THEN HE REALIZED HE HASN’T READ EITHER OF THEM YET

  46. zzzzzipp

      THAT WAS TOURISM

      “HEY–GUYS!–GUYS, I LOVED A MAN ONCE”. WE GET IT, MAN. THAT’S FINE.

  47. jereme

      classic marshall

  48. Lily Hoang

      Rikki Ducornet?

  49. Sean

      On the page or when you meet them?

      On the page, Erika Lopez.

  50. gavin

      Vollmann–his novels are like giant erections: long, veiny, and full of girth. and all the whores. so much about the whores.

  51. Matthew Simmons

      Usually it sort of feels like its me.

  52. Adam

      He was typing one-handed.

  53. jereme

      charles bukowski

  54. Ken Baumann

      joyce and beckett always seem to be angling for fucking, and fucking, in different ways

  55. Matthew Simmons

      it’s

  56. Michel

      Houellebecq

  57. Blake Butler

      so horny you can’t even punctuate without afterthought

  58. jereme

      also: paula bomer

  59. Lily Hoang

      good call, esp with joyce. his whole fart fetish–can we call it a fetish?–is a delight.

  60. voorface

      Anna Freud

  61. Nate

      seconded.

  62. James

      Ellroy

  63. damon
  64. rk

      marcel proust

  65. chet

      jim harrison. in writing and life

  66. crook teeth smile

      Melville

  67. michael

      nick hornby

  68. michael

      i misread the question

  69. magick mike

      i will perhaps second this

  70. Dick

      I’ll hazard a Helen Keller

  71. jonny ross

      irvine welsh, of course

  72. Paul Cunningham

      hehe, yes

  73. Juliette

      Ted Hughes.

  74. gene

      barry. henry miller.

  75. Guest

      Not sure, but I’ll bet they’re under 40.

  76. William

      Burroughs

  77. Greg

      Dulli

  78. Prince

      Rogers Nelson III

  79. Bret

      Easton Ellis

  80. KevinS

      Terry Southern.
      William Burroughs.
      Nicholson Baker (back in the day).

  81. L'il

      Kim

  82. Schulyer Prinz

      not a writer.

  83. voorface

      No one found my joke funny, so here’s the real answer: Marquis de Sade

  84. mimi

      I was at a restaurant (with a full bar – a drinky joint) in Berkeley a few weeks ago and the table next to us was having a rip-roaring discussion about I didn’t know what and I turned and looked at them quizzically half laughing and the woman closest to me said “Do YOU think Michael Chabon is gay?”

  85. mimi

      I’ll second Roth.

  86. Catherine Lacey

      Nicholson Baker

  87. Bambi A.

      philip roth

  88. alan

      peeper

  89. Sidney

      Sheldon

  90. Harold

      Robbins

  91. Hayden Derk

      Haruki Murakami.

  92. jackie corley

      seconded

  93. kristin

      does anyone else sense that Foer is waiting for the right moment to just let a big one go

      Wilmot/de Sade/Beardsley = pretty randy

      but my faves: Verlaine// Genet \ Rimbaud = a fisty bread dough sexcat sandwich + prison.

  94. marshall

      Ha. It is “classic marshall.”

  95. lily hoang

      Bolano sexes it up.

  96. marshall

      I think it’s funny to write “tao lin.” It’s like a slogan or a magic spell or something. It feels powerful.

  97. Marco Kaye

      Donald Barthelme

  98. marshall

      jeff goldblum

  99. jereme

      i wonder if dr. ruth ever did x

  100. Stu

      I will third this.

  101. Nick Antosca

      It’s definitely Roth.

  102. mark

      vollmann

  103. Guest

      tao lin

  104. Guest

      michael crichton

  105. Craig Davis

      To me “horny” is not the same as erotic or hypersexual.

      “They call it horny because its devilish, now see we dead wrong…” So its not eros that’s the operative idea in horniness, but rather the rub of desire against guilt. So its got to be a big-C Catholic. And because its an impish impulse, because it derives more pleasure from the play than the game, its a poet. And because its potential for excitement is predicated upon a set of rules designed to be ignored, its an American. And because its power stems from the larger cultural quiet around the question, its a midwesterner. And because its equal parts tactile curiosity and emotional disquiet, its a man.

      Ergo, John Berryman.

  106. Jay

      James Joyce via his love letters

  107. zzzzzipp

      NO WAY NOT MICHAEL

      ALTHOUGH THE THAILAND STORY IN “TRAVELS” WAS PRETTY RACEY, HE DID SEEM TO WANT TO DISTANCE HIMSELF FROM THAT UNDERAGE BROTHEL HE VISITED

  108. zzzzzipp

      FOR HOURS

  109. zzzzzipp

      HOUELLEBECQ IS A GOOD ONE

  110. evlav

      chabon: so horny he loses sight of his sexual orientation.

  111. zzzzzipp

      ZZZZZZIPP WANTED TO SAY MARQUIS DE SADE OR J.G. BALLARD BUT THEN HE REALIZED HE HASN’T READ EITHER OF THEM YET

  112. zzzzzipp

      THAT WAS TOURISM

      “HEY–GUYS!–GUYS, I LOVED A MAN ONCE”. WE GET IT, MAN. THAT’S FINE.

  113. jereme

      classic marshall

  114. evlav

      _drinky joint_

  115. lily hoang

      Rikki Ducornet?

  116. gavin

      Vollmann–his novels are like giant erections: long, veiny, and full of girth. and all the whores. so much about the whores.

  117. Guest

      He was typing one-handed.

  118. Ken Baumann

      joyce and beckett always seem to be angling for fucking, and fucking, in different ways

  119. lily hoang

      good call, esp with joyce. his whole fart fetish–can we call it a fetish?–is a delight.

  120. Janey Smith

      Emily Dickinson.

  121. damon
  122. chet

      jim harrison. in writing and life

  123. crook teeth smile

      Melville

  124. jonny ross

      irvine welsh, of course

  125. evlav

      most lascivious, licentious. or most lecherous … RD deserves a better word

  126. KevinS

      Terry Southern.
      William Burroughs.
      Nicholson Baker (back in the day).

  127. mimi

      I was at a restaurant (with a full bar – a drinky joint) in Berkeley a few weeks ago and the table next to us was having a rip-roaring discussion about I didn’t know what and I turned and looked at them quizzically half laughing and the woman closest to me said “Do YOU think Michael Chabon is gay?”

  128. mimi

      I’ll second Roth.

  129. uhhhhh

      pshhhhhh frederick is obviously the horniest barthelme

  130. jackie corley

      seconded

  131. Guest

      Ha. It is “classic marshall.”

  132. Guest

      I think it’s funny to write “tao lin.” It’s like a slogan or a magic spell or something. It feels powerful.

  133. Marco Kaye

      Donald Barthelme

  134. Guest

      jeff goldblum

  135. Nick Antosca

      It’s definitely Roth.

  136. Jay

      James Joyce via his love letters

  137. evlav

      _drinky joint_

  138. Janey Smith

      Emily Dickinson.

  139. evlav

      most lascivious, licentious. or most lecherous … RD deserves a better word

  140. samuel peter north

      sexed

  141. samuel peter north

      futureman, keep practicing your spelling! spend less time on here.

  142. Rich

      I was going to say Philip Roth, but I have to agree with you that the prize has to go to the Marquis de Sade. For Philosophy in the Bedroom alone he should get it.

  143. uhhhhh

      pshhhhhh frederick is obviously the horniest barthelme

  144. damon

      Ha!

  145. Pete Michael Smith

      wild nights, wild nights!

  146. Laryssa

      Seconded.

  147. magick mike

      what would you call him then? he is certainly “one who writes”

  148. magick mike

      ballard never strikes me as remarkably horny. also i think sade was more “creative” than “horny”

  149. magick mike

      emily dicked-her-son

      (via harmony korine & juvenile grade-schoolers everywhere)

  150. mark

      the “i want nookie” chapter of zimzum has got to be the horniest 5 pages i’ve ever read. and heartbreaking! horny and heartbreaking.

  151. samuel peter north

      sexed

  152. samuel peter north

      futureman, keep practicing your spelling! spend less time on here.

  153. Rich

      I was going to say Philip Roth, but I have to agree with you that the prize has to go to the Marquis de Sade. For Philosophy in the Bedroom alone he should get it.

  154. Kinetta

      agreed

  155. Stu

      The boy who wanted to be a journalist.

  156. damon

      Ha!

  157. Pete Michael Smith

      wild nights, wild nights!

  158. Laryssa

      Seconded.

  159. magick mike

      what would you call him then? he is certainly “one who writes”

  160. magick mike

      ballard never strikes me as remarkably horny. also i think sade was more “creative” than “horny”

  161. magick mike

      emily dicked-her-son

      (via harmony korine & juvenile grade-schoolers everywhere)

  162. mark

      the “i want nookie” chapter of zimzum has got to be the horniest 5 pages i’ve ever read. and heartbreaking! horny and heartbreaking.

  163. Kinetta

      agreed

  164. Stu

      The boy who wanted to be a journalist.

  165. Sasha

      Anais Nin

  166. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      I think I agree

  167. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      Bataille?

  168. Sasha

      Anais Nin

  169. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      I think I agree

  170. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      Bataille?

  171. Scottie

      Ayn Rand

  172. marshall

      She seems kinky. Rape fantasies and shit. BDSM shit.

  173. Scottie

      I think Leni Riefenstahl was the horniest female director of all time

  174. pb

      Robert Lopez, Gary Amdahl, Jereme Dean, Sidney Crosby, Rafael Nadal, Robert Lopez…

  175. pb

      Mary Gaitskill, R. Gay

  176. pb

      ALICIA ERIAN, Nick Antosca

  177. Roxane

      Hells yeah re: Gaitskill, Erian.

  178. Scottie

      Ayn Rand

  179. Guest

      She seems kinky. Rape fantasies and shit. BDSM shit.

  180. Scottie

      I think Leni Riefenstahl was the horniest female director of all time

  181. pb

      Robert Lopez, Gary Amdahl, Jereme Dean, Sidney Crosby, Rafael Nadal, Robert Lopez…

  182. pb

      Mary Gaitskill, R. Gay

  183. pb

      ALICIA ERIAN, Nick Antosca

  184. Roxane

      Hells yeah re: Gaitskill, Erian.

  185. Alban Fischer

      Irma Bombeck

  186. phm

      xTx. Duh.

  187. Alban Fischer

      Irma Bombeck

  188. phm

      xTx. Duh.