Our own Soffi Stiassni will be rewriting Tao Lin’s Eeeee Eee Eeee using Georges Perec’s sans ‘e’ method derived in A Void.

If you think Perec’s attempt impossible (as I did), here’s an excerpt:

Noon rings out. A wasp, making an ominous sound, a sound akin to a klaxon or a tocsin, flits about. Augustus, who has had a bad night, sits up blinking and purblind. Oh what was that word (is his thought) that ran through my brain all night, that idiotic word that, hard as I’d try to pun it down, was always just an inch or two out of my grasp – fowl or foul or Vow or Voyal? – a word which, by association, brought into play an incongruous mass and magma of nouns, idioms, slogans and sayings, a confusing, amorphous outpouring which I sought in vain to control or turn off but which wound around my mind a whirlwind of a cord […]

What is perhaps more remarkable is Gibert Adair’s English translation, just excepted, of Perec’s French La Disparition. I simply don’t know how Adair was able to translate that.

I look forward to Stoffi’s rewrite of —– — —-. I can see it already:

Andrw drivs back to Domino’s.

“Matt,” h says. “Thr’s a dolphin in the backsat. Can I go hom?”

“Lt m put ths pppronis on,” Matt says. “Thn I’ll cash you out.”

Aftr bing paid sixty-cnts gas mony for ach dlivry Andrw has fourtn dollars.

“Give half to th dolphin,” Matt says.

Which reminds me of artist Brendan Lott’s sans ‘a’ The Scrlet Letter. I think I’m gonna rewrite Stephen Dixon’s I. without the ‘i.’ I challenge someone to do The Castle without the ‘K.’

This is either high-brow Wheel of Fortune, or lowbrow Jeopardy! I can’t figure it out.