Hey Mike is there a one stop poetry megasite where I can 1) go to read cool poetics essays by everybody from C.D Wright to Laura Glenum, 2) catch up on reviews of books out from presses like City Lights, 3) watch videos of shit like Joshua Clover getting kicked out of a bank, 4) scan all the current poetry news that stays news and otherwise, 5) dive into a nicely manageable monthly poetry journal that features one poem by three people per issue, especially if those people are like Noelle Kocot or something, and 6) speaking of people also maybe find smart interviews with people like Tyrone Williams? Also it would help if this online poetry megasite were based out of the American desert. Like not the proverbial American desert but some actual sand and shit. Like also if the site were designed to be as clean and navigable as a desert highway.

Hi Mike, that’s weird that’s what you want because that’s actually exactly something Sara Renee Marshall and Joshua Marie Wilkinson invented December 11, 2011 and launched on January 1st, 2012. And it’s based out of Arizona.

Oh cool, I like them. What is this thing called?

The Volta.

Awesome. Also why is there a light on your water pitcher that flashes different colors depending on filter age?

I have no idea, but it’s terrifying and soothing in equal measures.

Yeah, yeah, ‘equal measures,’ boring, whatever Mike, if you’re so fucking smart why don’t you go talk to yourself using some bloated smart person prepositional phrases like ‘that which’ while I actually do something with my life like checking out The Volta.

=(

Sorry just kidding Mike I know how you need relentlessly undiluted adoration all the time so don’t worry I still love you.

=)!!!

Wow I didn’t think you could put exclamation marks after emoticons, that’s really kind of a new low, please don’t ever talk to me again.