September 6th, 2013 / 11:42 am

Dream I Had

Hillary Clinton was riding a horse around Congress in a misguided display of bravado.  The horse got spooked and started kicking desks over then bucked Hillary Clinton, who landed hard but was fine.  She started crying.  The horse terrorized Congress a little more before finding me (I was working as a page) and biting my forearm.  I panicked initially then realized it didn’t hurt, the horse wasn’t letting go, and the horse was suddenly docile for some reason.  It felt like it was trying to brush its teeth with my arm.  I led the horse out of the Capitol Building and onto the mall where it let go and jumped into the Potomac silhouetted by a setting sun.  I thought about tweeting at the New Yorker “I’m the page the horse bit” but decided against it in favor of showing up in person and offering to write one of those “Talk of the Town” columns about my experience.  So I went to the New Yorker office but had trouble finding the appropriate person to talk to.  I got into a fight with one guy that amounted to little more than flicking each other’s ears when the other’s back was turned.  Eventually I found the right person.  She was very nice and excited to speak to me and told me to get her something by the end of the week.  I flaked on the article for several months, quit my job as a page, and taught the cat and dog I owned in the dream to sleep on top of me, and each other, in a sort of pyramid shape.

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