April 7th, 2013 / 1:46 am
Random

Liveblogging a liveblog

~9:30pm:  Had idea for liveblog in kitchen.

~9:35pm:  Am making pasta.  Roommates all ate dinner before me and left, no one to talk about liveblog with.

9:37pm:  Ostensibly checking noodles for appropriate firmness, but really I’m just eating wet noodles.

9:43pm:  Felt idea for liveblog solidify into an inevitability, similar to how a rollercoaster reaches the top of its initial hill and goes over (the little cranking sound, the disconcerting staircase)

9:45pm:  Thought about great moments in liveblogging history: AWP 2011, The Hobbit, Megan Boyle

9:46pm:  Thought about an anthology of liveblogs — “Best American Liveblogs”

9:50pm:  Began recording liveblog thoughts on a legal pad — does this count?  Handwritten liveblog?

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10:00pm:  Finished pasta.  Used a bagel to “sop up” leftover sauce.  Felt excessive.

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10:01pm:  Vague, unfinished thought about how getting a colonoscopy is like a handshake welcoming you to middle age.

10:02pm:  Awareness that liveblog liveblog is taking the place of time previously committed to exercise.

10:10pm:  Did dishes.  Thought about a piece of literature I read earlier and tried to formulate an opinion of it, couldn’t.

10:12pm:  “Toyed with” a theory I have that art that neither excites nor upsets could, and maybe, should be considered successful — not necessarily boring, but art that produces a calm indifference or zen-like lack of thoughts or opinions is reassuring in some ways.  I don’t expect people to agree with me about this, but I hope they do.

10:15pm:  Briefly wondered if I would end up regretting this liveblog and concluded “undoubtedly yes,” then recalled previous internet embarrassments and felt my asshole clench a little while a sudden weightlessness came over me.

10:17pm:  Finished dishes, looked at phone.

10:24pm:  Am watching Michigan – Syracuse basketball game on my computer via British stream of “ESPN America.”  The commercials are amusing.  It’s really early in the morning there (England).

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10:30pm:  Realized my liveblog legal pad and blue pen are Michigan colors.  Go blue.

10:35pm:  Just remembered that I had a really funny, poignant observation about time zones earlier but now I can’t remember it.

10:42pm:  I couldn’t do the monkey bars as a kid but now I can do them no problem.  Go figure.

10:43pm:  Lol “go figure.”  Go fish.  Go Fishkind.

10:53pm:  I feel like they switched broadcasters at half time and I’m just now realizing it.

11:02pm:  I like it when the bands play instrumental versions of popular 90’s ska songs (Reel Big Fish, Mighty Mighty Bosstones) — that’s funny.

11:20pm:  Just realized I’m using my old macbook because I spilled whiskey on my new one which I took to get fixed today — god dammit, was trying not to think about that.  Fuck.

11:24pm:  Ugh.  Whiskey.  It went right in where the arrow keys are.  Funneled right in.  Liveblog.

Tags:

17 Comments

  1. tao lin

      very briefly read ‘~9:30pm: Had idea for liveblog in kitchen’

      as ‘had sex’

  2. megan boyle

      3:23AM: had idea to liveblog my comment to your liveblog as i was writing my comment, was going to lie and liveblog my whole comment with fake times but just going to post what i had written already:

      ‘thought “aaaand that’s a double-carb sop-up from liveblog andrew weatherhead, that’s a ‘bagel on pasta sop-up'” in sports announcer voice

      you seem to have experienced a reverse fart, via weightlessness resulting from asshole-clenching

      ’10:12pm: “Toyed with” a theory I have that art that
      neither excites nor upsets could, and maybe, should be considered
      successful — not necessarily boring, but art that produces a calm
      indifference or zen-like lack of thoughts or opinions is reassuring in
      some ways. I don’t expect people to agree with me about this, but I
      hope they do.’

      sweet’

      3:25AM: checked my web history. i clicked on a link to liveblog liveblog at 3:16AM, wondering if it would say something about my liveblog, thinking ‘sweet a weatherhead post, werther’s original…weatherhead…wether’s originalhead’ while scanning words to the bottom to see how long it would be. read tao’s comment and remembered seeing the word ‘Had’ in the beginning, then scrolled up to start reading and thought i saw ‘Had sex’ instead of ‘Had idea for liveblog in kitchen,’ unsure if this was related to tao’s comment.

      3:30AM: wrote everything above. all of what i’m writing now will be included in my liveblog tomorrow in giant reorganized update.

      3:33AM: now i understand why someone g-chatted me something about syracuse.

      3:35AM: clicked computer pic accidentally before i had finished writing this, darted from side to side in chair, remembered disqus auto-saves.

      3:39AM: read remaining liveblog liveblog. time zone forgetting thing seems sweet, interested in that as both what you could’ve thought had and that it was forgotten. i could never and still can’t do monkey bars. i like it when bands do that too. i’m using my dad’s computer because i spilled soup on mine, understand your struggles with fluids. when apple makes ‘waterproof macbook’ i’m going to go apeshit. go fishkind.

      3:40AM: looked at bottom half of liveblog liveblog again and realized i had completely not read the thing about switching broadcasters at halftime. maybe via just reading this now, but i feel like i’ve always assumed, but not paid attention to, that they always switch broadcasters at halftime.

      3:42AM: i meant ‘announcers’ not ‘broadcasters’…are they the same thing…shit…the people who would say ‘aaaand that’s a double-carb sop-up from weatherhead,’ is who i mean.

      3:46AM: cats are meowing. might make pasta, have been thinking about doing that for the past hour or so. forgot to mention i also do the eating wet noodles thing. this was sweet andrew, hope you keep going.

  3. shaun gannon

      lol wethers originalhead

  4. David Fishkind

      lol

  5. mimi

      i have been breaking pasta in half before boiling it for years, ever since, well

      because i really don’t like not having the entire length of the pasta under the surface of the boiling water right from the get-go

      also, easier/less sloppy to eat half-length cooked pasta once it’s sauced and on the plate

  6. Stephen Tully Dierks

      =) “Vague, unfinished thought about how getting a colonoscopy is like a handshake welcoming you to middle age.”

      “Briefly wondered if I would end up regretting this liveblog and concluded ‘undoubtedly yes,’ then recalled previous internet embarrassments and felt my asshole clench a little while a sudden weightlessness came over me.”

  7. deadgod

      I break spaghetti and linguini in thirds for both of your reasons (simultaneous submergence and easier control while eating (though the sauce gets spattered anyway)).

  8. deadgod

      Maybe ‘to blog’ is a fair synonym for “to write” or even “to be conscious” or even “to be”: a useful synecdoche.

      What’s the distinction in amount and/or kind of editing (and time delay between writing and posting?) between blogging and liveblogging?

      Maybe ‘to liveblog’ is a fair synonym for “to write” or even “to be conscious” or even “to be”: a useful synecdoche.

  9. megan boyle

      have been thinking similar things recently. all of it seems synonymous with all of it, to me. like any physical or non-physical output generated by you is a product of your consciousness, which is a product of ____, a product of ____, a product of ____, etc. (unsure of what the last two ‘a product of ____”s would be but i’m assuming they’re a part of something that keeps going forever)

  10. Weeatherhead

      I’ll keep going a little bit…

      1:46am: published liveblog.

      1:47am: edited liveblog to include a page break thing.

      1:48am: was already listening to reel big fish as I made the edit described above, though very absentmindedly — shifted awareness to a more active experience of reel big fish. realized i’d never seen any of their music videos.

      1:55am: switched to mighty mighty bosstones. (this is in youtube, btw.)

      2:00am: watched music video for sum41’s ‘fatlip’ as recommended by youtube. realized i like it, despite hating it when it came out. thought ‘it’s carefree and fun and relatively catchy, give ’em a break.’

      2:15am: brushed teeth, washed face, etc.

      2:20am: got in bed with computer. watched youtube videos of saves the day performing songs live. i only like that one album with ‘shoulder to the wheel’ on it. found my video selection was rather limited due to saves the day having a much larger catalog of songs than i expected and feeling averse to listening to anything i wasn’t already familiar with.

      2:25am: perceived a saves the day song as melodramatic, but felt okay with that. ‘allow some melodrama into your life.’

      2:30am: saw tao’s comment. tried to ‘up vote’ his comment, not sure to what effect (?) — it seemed to count my vote twice, like the number went ‘1’ and then the ‘1’ was replaced by a ‘2’ very shortly thereafter (?)

      2:32am: tried to reread liveblog liveblog, perceived it as totally incoherent, incomprehensible.

      3:05am: somehow over a half hour elapsed and i realized it was past 3.

      3:30am: fell asleep watching marina abramovic doc ‘the artist is present’ — had no thoughts. oh one thought: she seems to have an endless supply of money.

      ~10:15am: woke up. finish abramovic doc. thought it was funny when one of the people who wanted to sit across from her took her clothes off before sitting in the chair. there was a gasp from the crowd and i think i heard someone say ‘oh no’ in a hushed tone — so funny.

      11:15am: remembered liveblog liveblog, felt a little scared to look at it.

      11:20am: read megan’s comment. ‘double-carb sop-up’ yes, exactly, 2x carb source. double-play carb intake. pasta, bagel double carb.

      ‘reverse fart’ — exactly!

      i think announcers are the people who call the game in the stadium and the broadcasters call the game on tv?

      i didn’t break up the pasta because it was rigatoni.

  11. james duncan

      read ‘began’ in ‘9:50pm: Began recording liveblog thoughts on a legal pad — does this count? Handwritten liveblog?’ as a contraction of ‘megan boyle’

  12. tao lin
  13. Weeatherhead

      nice.

  14. deadgod

      being -> liveblogging

      becoming -> interactivity: blogging style changing in response to responses to blogging

      nothing -> yesterday’s and tomorrow’s blogs, except insofar as they exist essentially to today’s blogging

  15. mimi

      in thirds? wow. that’s whole other level shit.

  16. deadgod

      You know Campbell’s chicken noodle and beef noodle? That’s ~thirds of linguini sticks, right?

  17. mimi

      no, deaders, i do not “know Campbell’s chicken noodle and beef noodle” – that is, not personally
      but what i do know is that shit ain’t ‘al dente’