NON-CHRONOLICALLY LIVEBLOGGING AWP 2011 FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF A SOCIALLY-ALIENATED COUPLE (ALTERNATING SENTENCES, BEGINNING WITH MEGAN BOYLE, THEN TAO LIN)
Pointed Tao in the direction of large group of people standing by the “correct” entrance of building.
Talked to Clay Banes in entrance, said something like “he’s distributing your book” to Megan.
While waiting for Tao to poop, looked into crowd of people and tried to discern the most acceptable way to hold MacBook.
Walked past an acquaintance while saying things like “hey” and “this is Megan” in a moderately-loud—for being in a bar—voice.
After writing “BRB” on newly abandoned promotional packet, approached bar to use “free drink” coupon for sparkling water, saw a girl I knew in college and said to Tao, “I know her from high school.”
Felt someone tap my shoulder and turned, vaguely aware of some girls that I don’t know talking to Megan, to hear something like “Jesus, hey, it’s Jesus, I—“
Saw 4 people moving “BRB” packet and looking confusedly at each other.
Said the word “chapbook” 8 – 15 times while looking nonspecifically at the crowd and sometimes hugging Megan.
Adam Robinson sat down on table thing next to us and said “So, you guys are married?”
Walked into a room in which Blake Butler and Gene Morgan and Gene Morgan’s wife, Jenny, seemed to be “chilling,” sat opposite Jenny.
Felt vaguely aware that people knew my name and had thought things about me, maybe, when Tao said, “This is Megan”
Heard someone say “can I say your ‘pizza’ tattoo” for third or fourth time about Megan’s lower-lip tattoo that says “pizza.”
Realized mid-conversation with Jenny that I had no idea how we started talking about Santa Claus.
Heard someone say “eight hours” in reference to snorting ecstasy.
Heard Tao impatiently say, “Oh it’s you again?!” and “You can’t type, are you okay?”
The room “erupted” in people saying “Andrew” with the “rew” part sustained at a high volume.
Thought the room became really quiet when I said “Andrew,” walked to hug him, and felt awareness that the back of my ass was maybe damp or something.
Saw someone I thought might be someone else, waved at them, said “Oh” loudly, then sort of beckoned for Megan to block that person’s view of me.
Timothy Willis Sanders and Andrew Weatherhead are wearing the same hat.
Said “that’s good, that’s funny, that’s the kind of detail people wanted to hear” to Megan, sitting to my left, as we both sort of stared either at the MacBook screen or, beyond that, at Andrew Weatherhead and Timothy Willis Sanders, seated on separate sofas, talking to each other.
Tao said to Adam Robison, “She got in a car accident” and pointed to my head and Adam said, “Car accident?”
Pointed vaguely at two people dancing on a stage, the only two people on the stage, and looked at Megan with a neutral facial expression.
Shortly after Tao ‘flung’ open door to some kind of dance party room and started writing his sentence, said, “Oh I have a good one” and he yelled, “IT’S NOT CHRONALOGICAL”
Pointed vaguely at [previous sentence] and said “it seems mean” repeatedly.
Sort of hugged my head with right arm, then quickly put it down when I became aware of potential sweat stain.
Said “the Get Up Kids covered this” with unfocused eyes.
Saw dancing girl approach a drink next to Tao’s and my water bottle, sat erect, and tilted head with intention to “intimidate.”
Pulled MacBook away from Andrew Weatherhead while he typed “drrrrhtup” from behind the MacBook, his hands sort of determinedly dangling toward the keys.
Tao said, “You look sexy” and I said, “I want to have sex” as we started meandering/peeking into a room where there were a lot of jackets and a girl sitting.
Andrew Weatherhead said “that’s not liveblogging, it’s a Word document.”
Said, “You want to get in on the live blog” and Timothy Willis Sanders moved his head in front of computer and said “LIVEBLOGGGGGG” in a sort of Adam Sandler tone of voice.
Pointed at a comma in [previous sentence] and stared at Megan.
Started talking to someone whose face I recognized from Facebook.
Said “that was freeing?” in a medium-loud voice, to seemingly no response, while within hearing range, I felt, of six people.
When it was my turn to write a sentence, realized Michael Kimball, Melissa Broder, Timothy Willis Sanders and Tao were staring at computer screen.
Felt strong, positive feelings toward Blake Butler as we seemed to stare non-awkwardly into each other’s eyes while saying things about Emory University.
Made eye contact with Lincoln Michel who said, “We’re talking about elephant urine,” to which I said, “Oh. Did you,” no one said anything for ~3 seconds and then heard him explaining something about elephants.
Heard someone say “Yerba ketchup.”
Said to Timothy Willis Sanders, “You went to a transvestite,” to the sentence I now know was “I went to a Chinese restaurant.”
Said “you spelled his name wrong and changed an ‘a’ to a ‘s.”’
Looked at ceiling, guess it’s painted black or something.
Said “seems apathetic.”
Stephanie Barber approached room out of breath and grinning and said between laughs/gasps, “That room, you have to go in that room” and looked at Melissa Broder and Michael Kimball sitting on couch.
Shook hands with Gene Morgan as he said “you guys having fun? yeah? it’s a party, a literature party.”
Tao said, “Where the hell are we” as we approached door with piece of paper that someone had typed “COFFEE POT!!!!!!!!!” on.
Saw someone who looked like Stephen Elliott but wasn’t.
Tao said “Any details?” while turning my body somewhat comedically to left and right and I saw an overweight black man ‘disappear’ into hallway near us.