The Five Stages of Zack de la Rocha

Posted by @ 2:54 pm on May 25th, 2010

THE FIVE STAGES OF ZACK DE LA ROCHA

1. Denial that the washing machine is being used.

2. Rage against the machine, but mostly at his roommate who waits do to seven loads of laundry at once.

3. Bargaining with roommate for temporary use of the machine, and also who’s turn it is to clean the bathroom.

4. Depression over the fact that he’s 40 years old and still lives with a roommate (that and Capitalism).

5. Acceptance that he will not be doing any laundry, and that he has a Ph.D. in Anthropology.

[in collaboration with.] A revolution cannot be marketed. Christ, that made me sound like a dumbass. I found some Gandhi book on my bookshelf, read the first few pages, and was like “duh, obviously.” The truth is so apparent it’s unpointable; what’s difficult is actually following through: no wacking off to porn, binge drinking, stealing office supplies — you know, serious monk stuff. They got Che’s head on every college kid’s t-shirt, yet not Marie Antoinette’s, who gave good head (Hi Kate Z). Speaking of France, nice wristband there Zack. I used to turn up Rage Against the Machine loud and air guitar the riffs, convinced I too was disenfranchised yet weirdly on stage making millions. Me and Zack, after the show, would go back-stage and not bang chicks; instead, we’d read Marx or something (the fuller the beard, the better the idea: Marx, Darwin, Santa, etc.) The riffs eventually got old, lost inside some mismatched CD jewel case. Time has passed, so much. I can now mold an effigy of me with layers of new failures. I miss being young, miss the soundtrack of my days that weren’t just sighs, miss not thinking this was completely absurd:

"Killing in the name" lyrics (1992)

Uggh, how about a revision: Hello, I’ll do what you tell me because you’re my employer and I need health insurance and I have a mortgage, and I’m already concerned about retirement. Thanks, Motherfucker.

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