October 26th, 2010 / 6:09 pm
Random

Why We’re All Going to Die {Thirsty as Hell}

(and it won’t matter who can string together a pretty sentence)

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35 Comments

  1. Sean

      The fuck is this?

      We’re all going to die because we were placed on earth to die. That’s biology.

  2. Daniel Romo

      In honor of mean week, this post is stupid. She’ll probably take it down when her feelings get hurt like she did for a post about her stupid MFA experience (Sorry if that was someone else, but I don’t think so.).

  3. Sean

      The fuck is this?

      We’re all going to die because we were placed on earth to die. That’s biology.

  4. Amy McDaniel

      Biology is the study of life. That swimming pool is the study of death.

  5. PhantomStranger

      …because we’re mortal? We can’t swim? Oh, yeah, water in the middle of a place that doesn’t get much water. Yeah, that’s…uh…a good point too…

  6. Guest

      mean week fell the fuck off

  7. Amy McDaniel

      also, “placed on earth to…” is not biology, it’s theology.

  8. Trey

      I hate swimming.

  9. alexisorgera

      Water, people. Water in the desert. Swimming pools in the desert. Where’s that shit being pumped in from?

  10. Daniel Romo

      In honor of mean week, this post is stupid. She’ll probably take it down when her feelings get hurt like she did for a post about her stupid MFA experience (Sorry if that was someone else, but I don’t think so.).

  11. Daniel Romo

      Sorry. Some bitchfuck here posted as me. BITCHFUCK!

  12. alexisorgera

      that’s the spirit!

  13. M Kitchell

      i like deserts. i like swimming pools. if i were rich i would probably shit all over the earth in favor of having a giant swimming pool in the middle of the desert. the baseness of decadence appeals to me on a very distinct level. my critical awareness of this allows me to remain both a terrible and great person.

  14. deadgod

      a terrible and great person

      Yes, just the right stuff to get the Italian trains running on time.

  15. deadgod

      de-glaciation, rise – or disappearance – of snowlines, desertification, dessication of aquifers, irremediable pollution of fresh-water sources, changes in storm tracks so that a greater percentage of rain than now falls into the sea, changes in the atmosphere so it holds more water

      planet-wide environmentally triggered systems collapse will be “mean”

      those fingernail scratches on the last-built Easter Island monoliths? that was the panicky enviroalarmist whackos

  16. Matthew Simmons
  17. Justin RM

      “deadgod” . . . “dreadgod” . . . “godead” . . . “goddard” . . . “Robert H. Goddard.” Yes! I finally cracked the code. 1882-1945. 1-9-4-5. Why must you be so dead Robert H? Playing god with liquid-fueled rockets must have gotten you killed. Poor old Robert H.

  18. deadgod

      You couldn’t “crack” an egg in a bulldozer factory, cerebral skidmark.

  19. Noah

      I never see people swimming in these desert pools, just as I never see people doing anything relevant in their suburban yards. No I don’t you need to cut your lawn and crank on your superblower at 8:30 on a Sunday morning.

  20. Justin RM

      5.5/10. “Good effort!”

  21. Justin RM

      Poor old Robert H.

  22. Sean

      I call bullshit.

      (Just back from reading [seriously] so missed comment thread)

      Placed does not mean theology. Evolution could mean placed.

      That swimming pool could be the study of life.

      I do relevant things in my yard, though my yard is not suburban.

  23. deadgod

      Egg to “Justin RM”: ‘You’re Gonna Need a Bigger Bulldozer’

  24. deadgod

      “Placed” usually means ‘put deliberately’. If one wants ‘deliberation; intention; conscious control’ to be drawn out of some particular usage of the word, a disclaimer – like Darwin qualifying “selection” in ‘natural selection’ – should be employed: placed randomly or non-directedly.

      The pool is connected to “death” rather than to “life” if the consequences of its having been ‘placed’ where it is are considered, despite their invisibility in the photo.

      Amy’s annotation is rational.

  25. deadgod

      You’re drowning in hate.

  26. P. H. Madore

      disquis is really a shitty comment manager. I don’t mind waiting an extra three seconds for the whole page to load. Hitting load more comments all the time makes it difficult to figure out where I’m supposed to be talking shit. If I weren’t so dedicated to talking shit, I’d have given it up by now as a result of disquis. So wouldn’t you have.

  27. Sean

      I can’t use adverbs.

      Yeh, I’m just playing.

      I actually just thought it was weird to drop water use issues into mean week, but whatever.

      But online blogs save the environment. Now imagine this blog printed on paper.

  28. Trey

      in the spirit of mean week, HTMLGIANT will print its entire archive—including comments—and then burn it. fuck the environment.

  29. John Minichillo

      I am so tired of hearing this. It works. You don’t have to like it.

  30. MM

      I live in the high dez of E-Washington; we had some ice-age-floods some thou ago plus-plus, coulees carved into basalt by the rushing catastrophe of Missoula’s breached glacier-plug. Makes me question the category of ecosystem. Even now, all our weird wine (Mouvedre! Tempranillo! Lemberger! Primitivo!) is post-glacier irrigated. But yes, you’ve pointed out an inefficient luxury: they aint growin grapes with that sick cyan swimmin square, and safe to say they neither have invited any neighbors over! But if you want to talk enviro-uh-oh… we gotta talk about those plastic chairs, we gotta talk about all these cars, we gotta talk about ZZZZZIP the friendly electron and the sinister cancer he causes hindus who have to unsafely strip out precious metals from our outmoded silicon terminals.

  31. Daniel Bailey

      GOOD FUCKING POINT. WHY DON’T YOU WRITE A POEM ABOUT IT.

  32. Daniel Bailey

      OR AT LEAST POST ON A PERSONAL BLOG WHERE SO MANY HTMLGIANT POSTS ANYWAY.

  33. Daniel Bailey

      it’s still mean week right?

  34. Sean

      What is a blog?

  35. deadgod

      online blogs save the environment

      Not so fast. Where does electricity come from – ‘green coal’? ‘greenly dammed rivers’? ‘green radioactivity’? Where does plastic come from industrially, and where does it go when it’s discarded? The rare metals in computers: what are the environmental costs of their political-economic extraction? How are server farms kept manageably cool?

      Trey’s recommendation is redundant; all we have to do to fuck the environment is to live normally.