Everyone That Writes for This Site is Shit
Hi. It’s Mean Week. We are going to be mean to people. We are going to say things. We’re just being honest, and really we’re all a bunch of pieces of shit. We couldn’t write our way out of a paper bag (see, I can’t even make it a few sentences without cliche).. Here’s more reasons why we suck behind the jump:
Is a fucking moron. Bitches a lot, can whine about anything. Has a big ugly head. Doesn’t have a ‘real job’ so he gets to sit his ass and write all day while others have to work. Talks about babies too much and can’t seem to write anything unless it is grotesque or retarded or apocalyptic, which is a crutch.
Has never accepted writing for his web publication by someone he didn’t know, admits to it, is probably proud of it, what an elitist dick eater, um, is probably most responsible even moreso than Tao Lin for the ’emotional minimalist genre’ thanks a lot.
He’s asian, what can you expect from an asian? Has this personal website that he changes every 30 minutes to a new layout even though there’s hardly any content except for the stuff he publishes online which is essentially a large set of puns, won’t admit he edits Titular magazine, fuck him.
Went and had a goddamn baby instead of writing, ‘threw in the towel early,’ seems to want to have sex with Michael Kimball, can’t write a story without some dead philosopher showing up, probably is a real dick when you really meet him, needs to suck a d.
Likes the goddamn Grateful Dead of all things, his beard is pretty weak, somehow knows every damn writer on the face of the earth which he probably jerks off about in his room on his computer, edited an issue of McSweeney’s mostly, what a dick.
Who posts their tits on the internet? Lets her visitors to NYC get lost in the subway within the first 20 minutes of their visit, is mean, has an unhealthy obsession with cats, giggles constantly, probably drinks her own pee.
Started this ebook publishing house that he hardly tells anyone about, mostly only publishes girls he wants to stick it in, has been online for so long is probably really like 45 years old and still blogging for Hobart, what an old fuck.
His journal has a political section, what is that all about? Sometimes he’ll Gmail chat you and just what’s up and not having anything to say really, his beard might even be weaker than Justin’s, he posts a lot of poems on his blog, jeez.
Thinks he’s too good to publish on the internet, thus only publishes in print journals and stuff, always says half-smarmy deadpan shit in reaction to people like ‘i see’ or ‘mkay,’ is usually super nice unless gets drunk at which point the real Ryan comes out, is a jerk at heart.
* Sam Pink
Has been arrested in seven states for molestation, makes these shitty drawings, is a real slacker when it comes to posting on this blog for which he gets paid nothing, can’t even use his real name, is a turd, eats turds, is sad, is retarded, stop it.
Is hiding from Mean Week by going out of town so he doesn’t have to say anything mean, is probably a hipster in disguise, gets in a lot of fights online as a result of his ‘badboy’ image, can’t write a story without animals in it, is dumb, is ugly, is made of poop and sneezing, needs to shut up a lot.
Tags: bitches, fucking moron, minimalist
I thought you were going to be mean this week. Everyone one of these people is going to LIKE what you wrote about them. What a bunch of pussies.
Oh yes. We can be mean in the comments too. Bring it, Butler.
I thought you were going to be mean this week. Everyone one of these people is going to LIKE what you wrote about them. What a bunch of pussies.
Oh yes. We can be mean in the comments too. Bring it, Butler.
fuck, you’re right. i imagine it will get meaner as the week continues.
though mike already got upset about the beard weaker than justin’s, but if that’s the meanest i can do, i need to cut my baby dick off
fuck, you’re right. i imagine it will get meaner as the week continues.
though mike already got upset about the beard weaker than justin’s, but if that’s the meanest i can do, i need to cut my baby dick off
Ha, poor Mike.
Actually, Josh’s is hilarious. He’s going to like it, obviously, but it is really kind of mean. “Threw in the towel early” did make me cringe a little.
Ha, poor Mike.
Actually, Josh’s is hilarious. He’s going to like it, obviously, but it is really kind of mean. “Threw in the towel early” did make me cringe a little.
i am getting scared of mean week
i am getting scared of mean week
dude you are fucked
dude you are fucked
i am getting drunk tonight and posting pcitures of something
i am getting drunk tonight and posting pcitures of something
let’s get sexy
let’s get sexy
mine hurt my feelings. i think it is perfectly healthy to love a cat as if it were a life partner.
and BLAKE put my tits on the net- not me. i made him do it for just this express purpose. IT WAS NOT ME IT WAS HIM.
also, i didn’t LET blake get lost that day- he is a stupid moron who wandered on to a train we weren’t taking and only looked back sadly as the doors shut him away from us forever. he even told me before he came that he is like a child and needs a leash. i have had TENS of writers come stay with me in the city and blake is the only useless dumb fart who got lost.
also, why would you say anything mean about ryan!? I LOVE YOU RYAN
and also also, matt simmons only publishes girls he admires and respects and it has nothing to do with discrete hand jobs that may or man not have been given in the back of a cab (look for “Connor Oberst Sex” published by happy cobra books in the near future {winks at matthew})
also also also, I HATE SHANE JONES HE IS A JERK AND ALWAYS TRIES TO SCARE ME WHEN WE ARE GCHATTING AND ALSO HE CALLS ME A HIPSTER BUT LOOK AT HIM HE IS A HIPSTER ASSHAT
mine hurt my feelings. i think it is perfectly healthy to love a cat as if it were a life partner.
and BLAKE put my tits on the net- not me. i made him do it for just this express purpose. IT WAS NOT ME IT WAS HIM.
also, i didn’t LET blake get lost that day- he is a stupid moron who wandered on to a train we weren’t taking and only looked back sadly as the doors shut him away from us forever. he even told me before he came that he is like a child and needs a leash. i have had TENS of writers come stay with me in the city and blake is the only useless dumb fart who got lost.
also, why would you say anything mean about ryan!? I LOVE YOU RYAN
and also also, matt simmons only publishes girls he admires and respects and it has nothing to do with discrete hand jobs that may or man not have been given in the back of a cab (look for “Connor Oberst Sex” published by happy cobra books in the near future {winks at matthew})
also also also, I HATE SHANE JONES HE IS A JERK AND ALWAYS TRIES TO SCARE ME WHEN WE ARE GCHATTING AND ALSO HE CALLS ME A HIPSTER BUT LOOK AT HIM HE IS A HIPSTER ASSHAT
Kendra, these are comments, not diary entrees.
Kendra, these are comments, not diary entrees.
you were supposed to have the plastic harness on me!@!!!! my mother mailed it!!!!!!!!!!!!
kendra grant malone, im glad you love me now – it makes me feel better about myself. you didnt remember my name when we all got our picture taken in taos place at awp last year and that hurt my feelings a lot.
although, everyone was drunk. so i forgave you. i was really durnk.
and blake kicked me in the head.
you were supposed to have the plastic harness on me!@!!!! my mother mailed it!!!!!!!!!!!!
kendra grant malone, im glad you love me now – it makes me feel better about myself. you didnt remember my name when we all got our picture taken in taos place at awp last year and that hurt my feelings a lot.
although, everyone was drunk. so i forgave you. i was really durnk.
and blake kicked me in the head.
you’re mother is an idiot slut and forgot to specify the apt number so i never got it.
ryan, lets get married
you’re mother is an idiot slut and forgot to specify the apt number so i never got it.
ryan, lets get married
i am married already
and your tits are ugly jimmy. mine got waaaaay more comments.
I AM STARTING TO LIKE MEAN WEEK
i am married already
and your tits are ugly jimmy. mine got waaaaay more comments.
I AM STARTING TO LIKE MEAN WEEK
I HATE YOU RYAN AND EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU
I MAY OR MAY NOT BE DRUNK RIGHT NOW
i knew you would see the dark dark light
I HATE YOU RYAN AND EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU
I MAY OR MAY NOT BE DRUNK RIGHT NOW
i knew you would see the dark dark light
we’re just getting started, you’re going to be cutting motherfuckers e-necks by wednesday
we’re just getting started, you’re going to be cutting motherfuckers e-necks by wednesday
kgm
me tto
kgm
me tto
i am saving drunk mean week for late in the week, so i can reach the ceiling
i am saving drunk mean week for late in the week, so i can reach the ceiling
BLAKE I AM COMING TO ATLANTA NEXT WEEK AND CUTTING YOUR DICK OFF WITH MY BEARD IT’S SHARP IT”S A SHARP ASS BEARD
BLAKE I AM COMING TO ATLANTA NEXT WEEK AND CUTTING YOUR DICK OFF WITH MY BEARD IT’S SHARP IT”S A SHARP ASS BEARD
good.
good.