February 14th, 2011 / 1:40 am

MFA Applicant Waiting To Hear Back (c. 1615; Oil on canvas)


just kidding

Best caption gets a free copy of the new SUPERMACHINE (many thanks to Ben Fama for donating).

Contest judged by Andrew Gorin, whose idea this was and who’s waiting to hear back himself — wish him luck.

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  1. cm

      i’m stuck in seth abramson’s mfa circle of life.

  2. SP

      “Was it wrong of me to send all 70 pages of my novel-in-progress when the school only asked for 20?”

      “I knew I should’ve emailed Zadie Smith to put in a good word for me with the admissions people.”

      “Surely they’ll appreciate that my personal statement mentioned my ‘love of language’ over and over, won’t they?”

  3. phmadore

      Ashton Kutcher killed my cat!

  4. Anonymous

      “MFA in caption writing?”

  5. Sara

      “Talking about my suburban childhood adversity was a good move… right?”

      This is awfully timely—I just received a rejection from UT a few hours ago.

  6. Frank Tas

      I hope I get into the NYU Creative Writing program so I can quit my job checking IDs at a gay bar for lions.

  7. phmadore

      There’s like three ladies there.

  8. Frank Tas

      The ones way in the back? They look like dudes to me, if not toss-ups.

      All I see, definitively, is one, and her presence does not appear to be welcome.

  9. zusya

      NYU? don’t they give, like, zero funding?

      anyway, my caption: “Who farted?”

  10. Jhon Baker

      I’m here, like you said. Are you sure this will get me into the program?

  11. nliu


  12. phmadore

      You could be right. They could just be naughty bottoms, cutting off their manes and going rogue and so forth.

  13. shaun gannon

      jesus this job sucks. if i don’t get in i’ll fucking die, i swear

  14. name

      do any of you guys smell cat piss?

  15. NLY

      “Motha Fuckin Ate!”

  16. glennshaheen

      “Love me daddy!”

  17. Jack M

      “I can’t believe I’m the only one not wearing fur!”

  18. H. William Davis

      Which one to try first?

  19. Waller

      You took mine.

  20. let me in

      Come on, I was told loins and lions was the ticket!

  21. Madison Langston

      “goddd i hope they like my tumblr”

  22. drew kalbach

      “my dad is going to be so pissed when he figures out what an mfa is”

  23. Ben Zimmer

      “Please, please, just not another safety school.”


      “I believe so much in ME. I believe so much in ME.”

  24. SAA

      Yeah, I was going to go with:

      “But I paid that hack Seth Abramson hundreds of dollars to edit my manuscript, someone has to accept me!!!!”

  25. Anonymous

      Catz! Fuck me, they’re big.

  26. deadgod

      He who smelt it, dealt it.

  27. Bgkimzey

      “I hope they don’t read the rec letter from my Olive Garden manager.”

  28. AL

      This yoga position is hard.

  29. david cool what's up fishkind

      “Junot Diaz wrote my recommendation letter.”

  30. Jitter

      My name is James Franco. Perhaps you’ve seen one of my movies?

  31. C.D. Smith

      “Unannounced guest is a super pet peeve of mine…”


      “Room service uuuuugh! I hate when I order fruit and I can taste the other food they cut with the same knife. Beef flavored pineapples”

  32. Anonymous

      “where did my clothes go?”

  33. Trey

      also “what a misunderstanding!”

  34. chillwave gonzales

      “Oh, Fresh Direct! I’ve waited two hours for a fuckin case of Fancy Feast Fish Flavor. Girls are getting hungry.”

  35. Frank Tas

      Contest within a contest for best gay lion bar name.

      My entry:

      The Mane Vein

  36. Daniel R.

      “Please God, have HTML GIANT stop posting all things MFA.”

  37. zusya

      Lion Me

  38. zusya

      it works for all caption contests.

  39. Bobbie

      “I’ll miss y’all when I’m at workshop tables with people who have no life experience.”

  40. drew kalbach

      ‘i bet this recommendation letter from the htmlgiant contributors is really going to get the attention of these lions’

  41. Ancient Philosopher

      Fuck NYU — you guys are my boyz. My crew. My one-and-only. If Odd Future made it, so can we. Fuck.

  42. Penelope

      This won’t come between us, I swear. You’re always welcome at my NYU dorm — 6th-floor walkup, 60 square feet, shared bath, $2000/month. I’ll get pee-pee mats for the floor. They’ll double as sleep cushions. Cozy as clams in their fucking shell.

  43. Bobbie

      “Mr. Admissions Director, I know other applicants will claim they speak broken French and garbled German, but I just aced Advanced Lion! My roar has no accent.”

  44. deadgod

      The Roar Shack

      (most popular shot: a White Splat)

  45. deadgod

      ” . . . what else rhymes with ‘moon’ . . . “

  46. joseph keith

      You don’t understand, I took the robe off to entice the muses, not shag the prof.

  47. Belinda Carlisle

      “Will you please, please let me bring my little kitties to workshops? Several of them are prominent chapbook kitty-authors. What’s a man without his kitties?”

  48. A Gorin


  49. DL

      #1 – Wimoweh

      #2 – My shoulder has thought

  50. Sara
  51. Anonymous

      “The iphone 4”

  52. Sean

      Dear God, the lions smell and are getting serious. Take me to the lambs.

  53. mimi

      So does “I am so high right now.” (work for all caption contests.)

  54. Jimmy Chen

      oh, to be in the lyin’ pen again

  55. darby

      look at all these lions!

  56. darby

      i keep poking this guy with my toe. i think he’s dead.

  57. darby

      finally there are exactly enough lions for me!

  58. Lumans

      Noah: We’re going to need a bigger boat.

  59. R Ridge

      “I wonder what those cats in grad school will be like?”

  60. zusya

      “[censored]” could work in the same vein.

  61. Paternoster99

      ‘Give me the blood, Eli, and let me get out of here. Give me the blood, Lord, and let me get away!’

  62. michael

      Queens of the Jungle

  63. Frank Tas

      Instead of bears and twinks, there are Scars and Simbas.

  64. Vic the Viking

      Giraffe Pizza ‘n’ Stuff

  65. LionTamer

      Please! No more steak

  66. Lf

      Oh, Lord, I worked so long and hard on this. I hope they can read between the lions.


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