April 28th, 2010 / 6:14 pm
Random

Wink Wink Contest

Been following Hint Fiction?

The contest?

If you read HTML, yes. (Thanks, Roxane)

I glow flash, write/teach/advocate for flash. But I’m wondering. When do we do this big, when do we go all the way, I mean fucking Double Down KFC big?

I want  a contest where every submission is a blank page. Everything off the page.

Who will write the next silent symphony, the 4:33? The Godot of flash?

Who is up for a blank page flash contest?

Oh that’s just silly (or smart?). Let’s go 3, 3–a holy number, words. Give me 3 words. I’ll begin.

Dolphin Nachos, Bono?

(The award is a good book [my choice–it will rock ass], hot sauce [It will kill your spleen and brain. It will be hot like donuts or making out in the bathroom at that Halloween party] and a brand new deck of kick-ass cards [literary theme])

Tags: , , ,

380 Comments

  1. darby—
  2. Sean—

      That comment was not 3 words, Darby.

  3. Sean—

      But seriously, Darby, I guess you just trumped my post. Kind of awesome.

  4. Tim—

      They petted me.

  5. anon—
    • Michael Kimball—

        About 20 years ago, I published a piece in The Quarterly that was titled — Now Do You Remember? — and then the rest of the page was blank.

    • Jarrid Deaton—

        Adolf couldn’t paint.

    • Ethel Rohan—

        All there, waiting.

    • Mel Bosworth—

        Dancing scrotum pole.

    • davidpeak—

        bag of dicks

    • Sean—

        I like the 20 years ago angle. I have to argue day-2-day that “flash” is not new. It is not “oh, kids today….” Get off my lawn, etc.

        But.

        Michael.

        Enter my contest!!

        Don’t u want a book, a deck of cards, a hot sauce???

        Fucking A you do. I’m talking a bottle of hot sauce that will make you not want to pay taxes, no matter what the rational brain says. A serious hot sauce. Like Haitian born, which is always a good hot sauce vibe.

        Why is no person responding in 3 words??

        Respond your opinion, OK. Then respond in 3 words!! Enter.

        Fuck.

        (sorry–I am hyper 2night and drinking a leftover carafe of Ouzo.)

        !!

    • Dennis Mahagin—

        Peregrine Carpal Unrest

    • d—

        Causal lifeless cunt.

    • I. Fontana—

        But I forget

    • Shannon Peil—

        don’t stop believing.

    • Josh—

        shit is weak

    • Charles—

        Swab, then Pavulon.

    • Hank—

        Better be good.

    • raj—

        Balls morris catapult.

    • raj—

        can we enter more than once? i kind of want to enter a bunch.

    • Sean—

        u can enter all u want. I will judge this thing Drunk (caps intended) then send you a kick-balls prize package,

    • Jhon Baker—

        ainsi il va

    • raj—

        Doll meats canvas.

    • raj—

        Complete as bloused.

    • stefan michael—

        Shadow, then gone.

    • robert—

        Is it over?

    • Tyler—

        Listen here dickhead

        Richard fucking Karn

        Sleep with me

        Richard Karn fucking

        Melt some cheese

    • gavin pate—

        If not, go.

    • Tim Horvath—

        “Out.”
        “Macbeth?”
        “Literal.”

    • raj—

        Columbian necktie tastes.

    • Sean K—

        bump, set, squish

    • raj—

        Honey covered scaphism.

    • raj—

        Immured, we’re ungoners.

    • Angulo—

        “You would… asshole.”

    • raj—

        It is pronounced.

    • SA—

        Coconut breast milk.

    • Trey—

        Eating hand-shaped flowers.

    • rion—

        His anus bled.

    • Alex—

        Yes dear. Now.

    • Alex—

        Jesus Jerry, why?

    • NK—

        I feel like

    • raj—

        Scoop my eyes.

    • raj—

        Camille. Once Cameron.

    • Jack Boettcher—

        1

        Bear now house.

        2

        Quark remembers you.

        3

        “Moneys n fridge”

    • darby—
    • raj—

        Lips shave red.

    • Alex—

        I loved vodka.

    • raj—

        ugh that should be

        “Columbian tastes necktie.”

    • Sean—

        That comment was not 3 words, Darby.

    • raj—

        Pop goes Amelia.

    • Sean—

        But seriously, Darby, I guess you just trumped my post. Kind of awesome.

    • raj—

        Genitals contain multitudes.

    • chet—

        my outstretched wiener

    • jesusangelgarcia—

        Kerouac, Thomas, Lovelace

    • jesusangelgarcia—

        Amelia milks Denver

    • Tim—

        They petted me.

    • raj—

        Baldwins miss James.

    • Michael Kimball—

        About 20 years ago, I published a piece in The Quarterly that was titled — Now Do You Remember? — and then the rest of the page was blank.

    • Adam—

        Forever, I live.

    • Trey—

        perfect.

    • raj—

        I take bullets.

    • corey—

        gargantuan feral orangatange

    • Rawbbie—

        Shit? Piss? Fuck!

    • anon—

        habitual emotional vacillator

    • Rawbbie—

        I’m not drunk.

    • raj—

        Cookie dough cocks.

    • Jarrid Deaton—

        Adolf couldn’t paint.

    • Ethel Rohan—

        All there, waiting.

    • Rawbbie—

        Vodka plus redbull.

    • Mel Bosworth—

        Dancing scrotum pole.

    • davidpeak—

        bag of dicks

    • Rawbbie—

        Now I’m drunk.

    • Rawbbie—

        Oh yeah! Weed.

    • Rawbbie—

        Can I play?

    • Sean—

        I like the 20 years ago angle. I have to argue day-2-day that “flash” is not new. It is not “oh, kids today….” Get off my lawn, etc.

        But.

        Michael.

        Enter my contest!!

        Don’t u want a book, a deck of cards, a hot sauce???

        Fucking A you do. I’m talking a bottle of hot sauce that will make you not want to pay taxes, no matter what the rational brain says. A serious hot sauce. Like Haitian born, which is always a good hot sauce vibe.

        Why is no person responding in 3 words??

        Respond your opinion, OK. Then respond in 3 words!! Enter.

        Fuck.

        (sorry–I am hyper 2night and drinking a leftover carafe of Ouzo.)

        !!

    • Dennis Mahagin—

        Peregrine Carpal Unrest

    • Andy—

        fine with that.

    • raj—

        Carson recalls Sagan.

    • raj—

        Mistletoe thumbs chuppah.

    • d—

        Causal lifeless cunt.

    • I. Fontana—

        But I forget

    • Shannon Peil—

        don’t stop believing.

    • deathbyragtime—

        shit is weak

    • Charles—

        Swab, then Pavulon.

    • Hank—

        Better be good.

    • raj—

        Balls morris catapult.

    • erat—

        Then, everything moved.

    • raj—

        can we enter more than once? i kind of want to enter a bunch.

    • Sean—

        u can enter all u want. I will judge this thing Drunk (caps intended) then send you a kick-balls prize package,

    • Rusty—

        Louisiana hot sauce.

    • Kyle Minor—

        More wax, Mom.

    • z.green.—

        “Whatcha readin’ fer?”

    • P. William Grimm—

        I loved once.

    • Jhon Baker—

        ainsi il va

    • zusya—

        Sunrise. She died.

    • raj—

        Doll meats canvas.

    • raj—

        Complete as bloused.

    • stefan michael—

        Shadow, then gone.

    • demi-puppet—

        Philip Seymour Hoffman.

    • demi-puppet—

        That’s nine words.

    • anon—

        win

    • anon—

        Dukes of Hazzard

    • anon—

        Stone Mountain, Georgia

    • Naomi—

        Nosferatu was crying

    • robert—

        Is it over?

    • Tyler—

        Listen here dickhead

        Richard fucking Karn

        Sleep with me

        Richard Karn fucking

        Melt some cheese

    • Tom—

        twice, never again

    • mimi—

        call in theladywiththealligatorpurse

    • gavin pate—

        If not, go.

    • Steve—

        Mickelson?? Bitch, please!

    • ddddDaan—

        “tao lin”, maybe

    • ddddDaan—

        no wait —

        “tao lin”, maybe.

    • Tim Horvath—

        “Out.”
        “Macbeth?”
        “Literal.”

    • raj—

        Columbian necktie tastes.

    • Sean K—

        bump, set, squish

    • raj—

        Honey covered scaphism.

    • raj—

        Immured, we’re ungoners.

    • Angulo—

        “You would… asshole.”

    • raj—

        It is pronounced.

    • SA—

        Coconut breast milk.

    • Trey—

        Eating hand-shaped flowers.

    • Rion Amilcar Scott—

        His anus bled.

    • Alex—

        Yes dear. Now.

    • Alex—

        Jesus Jerry, why?

    • NK—

        I feel like

    • raj—

        Scoop my eyes.

    • raj—

        Camille. Once Cameron.

    • raj—

        Bieber, conspicuous gallant.

    • Jack Boettcher—

        1

        Bear now house.

        2

        Quark remembers you.

        3

        “Moneys n fridge”

    • raj—

        Lips shave red.

    • Alex—

        I loved vodka.

    • raj—

        ugh that should be

        “Columbian tastes necktie.”

    • raj—

        Pop goes Amelia.

    • Nathan Hirstein—

        Rauschenberg already erased.

    • raj—

        Genitals contain multitudes.

    • chet—

        my outstretched wiener

    • jesusangelgarcia—

        Kerouac, Thomas, Lovelace

    • jesusangelgarcia—

        Amelia milks Denver

    • raj—

        Baldwins miss James.

    • michael—

        “Mom isn’t dead.”

    • raj—

        Asshole cosmos chaparral.

    • Adam—

        Forever, I live.

    • Trey—

        perfect.

    • raj—

        I take bullets.

    • corey—

        gargantuan feral orangatange

    • Rawbbie—

        Shit? Piss? Fuck!

    • anon—

        habitual emotional vacillator

    • michael—

        LOST: Heirloom wheelchair.

    • Rawbbie—

        I’m not drunk.

    • raj—

        Cookie dough cocks.

    • Rawbbie—

        Vodka plus redbull.

    • Rawbbie—

        Now I’m drunk.

    • Rawbbie—

        Oh yeah! Weed.

    • Rawbbie—

        Can I play?

    • Andy—

        fine with that.

    • raj—

        Carson recalls Sagan.

    • raj—

        Mistletoe thumbs chuppah.

    • erat—

        Then, everything moved.

    • Rusty—

        Louisiana hot sauce.

    • Kyle Minor—

        More wax, Mom.

    • z.green.—

        “Whatcha readin’ fer?”

    • P. William Grimm—

        I loved once.

    • demi-puppet—

        Philip Seymour Hoffman.

    • demi-puppet—

        That’s nine words.

    • anon—

        win

    • anon—

        Dukes of Hazzard

    • anon—

        Stone Mountain, Georgia

    • Naomi—

        Nosferatu was crying

    • Tom—

        twice, never again

    • mimi—

        call in theladywiththealligatorpurse

    • Steve—

        Mickelson?? Bitch, please!

    • ddddDaan—

        “tao lin”, maybe

    • ddddDaan—

        no wait —

        “tao lin”, maybe.

    • raj—

        Bieber, conspicuous gallant.

    • Nathan Hirstein—

        Rauschenberg already erased.

    • michael—

        “Mom isn’t dead.”

    • raj—

        Asshole cosmos chaparral.

    • michael—

        LOST: Heirloom wheelchair.

    • david e—

        You, dad, you.

    • dot.zen—

        He wept; silently.

    • Elsbeth—

        Antigravity helmet fail—.

    • Donald—

        “Seems sweet.”
        “Damn.”

    • anon—

        Yeah!

    • Donald—

        Let’s discuss semicolons.

    • Adam R—

        These are great.

    • David—

        Baby shoes, used.

    • Donald—

        Was that good?

    • uhhhhh—

        Jurassic Park IV

    • uhhhhh—

        Elevator fart — whodunit?

    • ZZZZZIPP—

        Farting elevator? Caution.

    • Amber—

        Is this it?

    • Donald—

        Corby trouser press.

    • Donald—

        . . . but not yet.

    • Jeremy Bauer—

        Dog sweater nebula

    • Jack Boettcher—

        You used twelve.

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        (OT: There are a lot of Timothys and Tims now that post only with their first names and make me nervous somebody will mistake them for me.)

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        double down hearburn

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        *heartburn

    • Joseph Riippi—

        Together, we danced.

    • zusya—

        …or could he?

    • Donald—

        We were young.

    • Timmo—

        She heaved lard.

    • Timmo—

        Also:

        Borinko juggled babies.

    • Timmo—

        Bigfoots outside. Hungry.

    • Timmo—

        Plastic surgeon miscut.

    • Ben Brooks—

        spooning in church

    • brittany wallace—

        secretly, i feel

    • Joseph Riippi—

        Paul is dead?

    • Joseph Riippi—

        Beginning. Middle. End.

    • Matthew Simmons—

        Much too much.

    • demi-puppet—

        I did not.

    • James Johnson—

        Open your mouth.

    • mimi—

        Lady’sroom wickedwitch soulkiss.

    • david e—

        i like hearburn, for real

    • D.—

        Shaken Coke abortion.

    • Sam Ligon—

        She’s already gone.

    • david e—

        You, dad, you.

    • stephen—

        Why yes. Sweet.

    • Sam Ligon—

        Nothing was forgiven.

    • dot.zen—

        He wept; silently.

    • Elsbeth—

        Antigravity helmet fail—.

    • ce.—

        Disco men’s room.

    • Donald—

        “Seems sweet.”
        “Damn.”

    • anon—

        Yeah!

    • Donald—

        Let’s discuss semicolons.

    • Ridge—

        Nothing. Something. Nothing.

    • Nathan Tyree—

        It bleeds now

    • JScap—

        Ten percent off

    • Elle Noir—

        Oh you didn’t…

    • Nathan Tyree—

        Portmanteau bread box

    • Adam Robinson—

        These are great.

    • ZZZZZIPP—

        Who pays retail?

    • David—

        Baby shoes, used.

    • Nathan Tyree—

        Blood box kite

    • ZZZZZIPP—

        “Hey, Hitler. Nice.”

        “Oh, fuck. Ass.”

        “Why? Hitler–bad?”

        “Yes, you idiot.”

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        I fucked Bambi

    • Nathan Tyree—

        Bambi woods?

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        almost but also

    • Revision (Jack B.)—

        Bear, opened. House.

    • JimR—

        Your first orgy?

    • Sam Ligon—

        If you’d just–

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        under over through

    • Ridge—

        God impregnated Mom?

    • Donald—

        Was that good?

    • uhhhhh—

        Jurassic Park IV

    • uhhhhh—

        Elevator fart — whodunit?

    • ZZZZZIPP—

        Farting elevator? Caution.

    • Amber—

        Is this it?

    • BohemianBroad—

        fuck me please

    • BohemianBroad—

        hah thats good!

    • BohemianBroad—

        thats great!

    • BohemianBroad—

        this life again?

    • BohemianBroad—

        faked his life

    • anon—

        HOT ANAL JOUSTING

    • Donald—

        His life’s work.

    • Donald—

        Corby trouser press.

    • Donald—

        . . . but not yet.

    • Jeremy Bauer—

        Dog sweater nebula

    • Kristen Iskandrian—

        Orphaned by weather.

        (Contest closed yet?)

    • Jack Boettcher—

        You used twelve.

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        (OT: There are a lot of Timothys and Tims now that post only with their first names and make me nervous somebody will mistake them for me.)

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        double down hearburn

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        *heartburn

    • Joseph Riippi—

        Together, we danced.

    • Donald—

        We were young.

    • Timmo—

        She heaved lard.

    • Timmo—

        Also:

        Borinko juggled babies.

    • Timmo—

        Bigfoots outside. Hungry.

    • Timmo—

        Plastic surgeon miscut.

    • Ben Brooks—

        spooning in church

    • brittany wallace—

        secretly, i feel

    • Joseph Riippi—

        Paul is dead?

    • Joseph Riippi—

        Beginning. Middle. End.

    • Matthew Simmons—

        Much too much.

    • demi-puppet—

        I did not.

    • James Johnson—

        Open your mouth.

    • Sean—

        Holy shit good!

    • Sean—

        announce winner tomorrow

    • davidpeak—

        “never been worn”

    • davidpeak—

        “never been worn”

    • davidpeak—

        “pre-worn”

    • mimi—

        Lady’sroom wickedwitch soulkiss.

    • david e—

        i like hearburn, for real

    • D.—

        Shaken Coke abortion.

    • Sam Ligon—

        She’s already gone.

    • stephen—

        Why yes. Sweet.

    • Sam Ligon—

        Nothing was forgiven.

    • anon—

        INSTANT CLASSIC

    • anon—

        oooooooooooooooooooooooooooh shit.

    • anon—

        me me me

    • Nathan Tyree—

        Please, let’s not

    • ce.—

        1) Every time there’s

        2) a contest like

        3) this, someone always

        4) pulls this card,

        5) and, I sigh.

    • ce.—

        So it goes.

    • Nathan Tyree—

        and so on

    • Nathan Tyree—

        stop the bleeding

    • ce.—

        Disco men’s room.

    • Ridge—

        Nothing. Something. Nothing.

    • Nathan Tyree—

        It bleeds now

    • JScap—

        Ten percent off

    • Elle Noir—

        Oh you didn’t…

    • Nathan Tyree—

        Portmanteau bread box

    • ZZZZZIPP—

        Who pays retail?

    • Nathan Tyree—

        Blood box kite

    • ZZZZZIPP—

        “Hey, Hitler. Nice.”

        “Oh, fuck. Ass.”

        “Why? Hitler–bad?”

        “Yes, you idiot.”

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        I fucked Bambi

    • Nathan Tyree—

        Bambi woods?

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        almost but also

    • jd—

        catch fire bitch

    • Revision (Jack B.)—

        Bear, opened. House.

    • JimR—

        Your first orgy?

    • Sam Ligon—

        If you’d just–

    • Tim Jones-Yelvington—

        under over through

    • Ridge—

        God impregnated Mom?

    • BohemianBroad—

        fuck me please

    • BohemianBroad—

        hah thats good!

    • BohemianBroad—

        thats great!

    • BohemianBroad—

        this life again?

    • BohemianBroad—

        faked his life

    • anon—

        HOT ANAL JOUSTING

    • Donald—

        His life’s work.

    • Kristen Iskandrian—

        Orphaned by weather.

        (Contest closed yet?)

    • anon—

        hello kitty menopause

    • anon—

        care bear creole

    • anon—

        my little potbelly

    • anon—

        kabuki dick dance

    • Sean—

        Holy shit good!

    • Sean—

        announce winner tomorrow

    • anon—

        star in turmoil

    • anon—

        a delinquent mind

    • anon—

        rub my gunt

    • Matthew Simmons—

        Why’d I try?

    • Matthew Simmons—

        Things done changed.

        (Stole that from B.I.G.)

    • Matthew Simmons—

        That will do.

    • davidpeak—

        “never been worn”

    • anon—

        a mother suicides.

    • davidpeak—

        “never been worn”

    • anon—

        apple nipple monkey

    • davidpeak—

        “pre-worn”

    • anon—

        dollar store troubadour

    • anon—

        she doesn’t swallow

    • anon—

        neither will he.

    • anon—

        adolf oliver tits

    • anon—

        cunnilingus, the mighty!

    • anon—

        oprah tucks hers.

    • anon—

        INSTANT CLASSIC

    • anon—

        oooooooooooooooooooooooooooh shit.

    • anon—

        me me me

    • Nathan Tyree—

        Please, let’s not

    • ce.—

        1) Every time there’s

        2) a contest like

        3) this, someone always

        4) pulls this card,

        5) and, I sigh.

    • ce.—

        So it goes.

    • Nathan Tyree—

        and so on

    • Nathan Tyree—

        stop the bleeding

    • jd—

        catch fire bitch

    • ASC—

        crucified tamales rock

    • Tim Horvath—

        Txts maid public.

    • anon—

        hello kitty menopause

    • anon—

        care bear creole

    • anon—

        my little potbelly

    • anon—

        kabuki dick dance

    • anon—

        star in turmoil

    • anon—

        a delinquent mind

    • anon—

        rub my gunt

    • Matthew Simmons—

        Why’d I try?

    • Matthew Simmons—

        Things done changed.

        (Stole that from B.I.G.)

    • Matthew Simmons—

        That will do.

    • anon—

        a mother suicides.

    • David Grossman—

        Die death rebirth.

    • anon—

        apple nipple monkey

    • anon—

        dollar store troubadour

    • anon—

        she doesn’t swallow

    • anon—

        neither will he.

    • anon—

        adolf oliver tits

    • anon—

        cunnilingus, the mighty!

    • anon—

        oprah tucks hers.

    • ASC—

        crucified tamales rock

    • Tim Horvath—

        Txts maid public.

    • David Grossman—

        Die death rebirth.

    • HTMLGIANT / winner winner hot sauce dinner—

        […] for the “Wink Wink” contest, the 2010 results are […]

    • Sean—

        RESULTS ARE IN.

    • Sean—

        RESULTS ARE IN.