June 2nd, 2009 / 3:08 pm
Random

HTMLGIANT Wants To Know:

Do you have any weird food/eating/drinking habits?

dsc00707

Sometimes I like to put ice in my glass of milk.

Tags: , ,

181 Comments

  1. ryan

      i put applesauce on grilled cheese sandwiches and on homemade macaroni and cheese (but not box-made or tv dinner mac & c)

      also my favorite part of pancakes is the runny egg yolk mixing with the syrup.

      um, i probably have more…

  2. ryan

      i put applesauce on grilled cheese sandwiches and on homemade macaroni and cheese (but not box-made or tv dinner mac & c)

      also my favorite part of pancakes is the runny egg yolk mixing with the syrup.

      um, i probably have more…

  3. Ryan Call

      applesauce on grilled cheese and mac is new to me. that is great.

  4. david erlewine

      does holding food in my mouth until the taste is gone and then spitting it into the trash can count?

      i used to eat nutty bars, but lathered in cookie dough (home made) and topped off with cool whip.

  5. Ryan Call

      applesauce on grilled cheese and mac is new to me. that is great.

  6. david erlewine

      does holding food in my mouth until the taste is gone and then spitting it into the trash can count?

      i used to eat nutty bars, but lathered in cookie dough (home made) and topped off with cool whip.

  7. Lincoln

      The only yogurt I will eat is blueberry yogurt and I will do so by licking the back of the spoon (to avoid the actual blueberries.)

      This is not a joke, but I think its my only truly weird food quirk.

  8. Lincoln

      actually saying its the only yogurt I “will” eat is wrong. It is the only yogurt I have EVER eaten.

  9. Ryan Call

      holding in your food until the taste is gone and then spitting it out counts. absolutely.

      why do you do that?

  10. Lincoln

      The only yogurt I will eat is blueberry yogurt and I will do so by licking the back of the spoon (to avoid the actual blueberries.)

      This is not a joke, but I think its my only truly weird food quirk.

  11. Lincoln

      actually saying its the only yogurt I “will” eat is wrong. It is the only yogurt I have EVER eaten.

  12. Ryan Call

      holding in your food until the taste is gone and then spitting it out counts. absolutely.

      why do you do that?

  13. Ryan Call

      that is weird, sure. but have you tried the yogurt that has no berries in it?

      or do you like licking the back of the spoon to avoid the berries?

  14. Ryan Call

      that is weird, sure. but have you tried the yogurt that has no berries in it?

      or do you like licking the back of the spoon to avoid the berries?

  15. Lincoln

      I’ve never had non-blueberry yogurt. Maybe I’d like it more. I don’t know, I don’t’ eat yogurt that often and for some reason have a childhood association with blueberry yogurt (ditto with brown sugar and cinnamon oatmeal, but that seems more standard) and its all I ever think to buy

  16. Lincoln

      I’ve never had non-blueberry yogurt. Maybe I’d like it more. I don’t know, I don’t’ eat yogurt that often and for some reason have a childhood association with blueberry yogurt (ditto with brown sugar and cinnamon oatmeal, but that seems more standard) and its all I ever think to buy

  17. KevinS

      Yogurt is involved in many food quirks, I would imagine.
      I eat maple or coffee yogurt with peanut butter M&Ms or smashed up pieces of Heath bar.

  18. KevinS

      Yogurt is involved in many food quirks, I would imagine.
      I eat maple or coffee yogurt with peanut butter M&Ms or smashed up pieces of Heath bar.

  19. Ryan Call

      i did not realize there was maple or coffee yogurt?

  20. Ryan Call

      i did not realize there was maple or coffee yogurt?

  21. pr

      haha-
      Ah, this is just where my mind is today.

      I put salt and vinegar potato chips in most of my sandwiches. (Not regular, only salt and vineagar.)

      I almost always leave a tiny morsel of food on my plate, no matter what I am eating. Otherwise, I’m a plate cleaner. My younger son does the same thing and my husband, who finds this annoying, thinks it’s genetic.

      I have, occasionally, this neurotic thing where i get all confused as to what the last bite, hence taste, of my meal should be. Last night, I ate a bit of parmesan toast and then realized I didn’t want that to be the last taste in my mouth (indeed it was going to be the morsel left ) and so had to break open a pork chop and work hard to get one last bite out of that motherfucker.

      Once, I became obsessed with avocados (high school) and I ate two or three a day for snacks and gained ten pounds. It was OK. I’ve always been skinny.

      From the age of 10 to 12 or so ,I became obsessed with making the perfect cheese omelet (for after school snack, for whenever) because we had this awesome omelet pan. I ate lots of cheese omelets. When I burned out on them, it was for real. To this day, I can’t eat one.

      I was voted “eats the most” in high school. A category they made up that year in the yearbook. It may have been a joke about my skinniness, but I think it was more a comment on my early years as a stoner who would eat for stoner snack- (at the snack place)- an order of fried dough, a grilled cheese, cheese sticks and a candy bar, or shit like that, in those amounts.

      I love food. I have high cholesteral. I still eat more or less way too much fatty shit. Sigh. I trained myself to be an excellent baker when my husband and I first fell in love. I would bake all day for him- chocolate rasperry tarts, peach pie, mascarpone this or that, and so on. Sometimes, I would bake so much I’d make him take a pie to work. Other times, I’d walk down Prince street (where we lived at the time) and bring a pie to my friend who owned a store a block from me.

  22. ryan

      the only yogurt i’ll eat is vanilla, and even then i’ll only eat it with cheerios or grapenuts mixed in (or both)

  23. ryan

      the only yogurt i’ll eat is vanilla, and even then i’ll only eat it with cheerios or grapenuts mixed in (or both)

  24. ryan

      i like to put potato chips in my sandwiches! especially on turkey or pb&j

  25. ryan

      i like to put potato chips in my sandwiches! especially on turkey or pb&j

  26. ryan

      my mom always served both with applesauce, so i grew up thinking it was normal. i’ve heard it may be a southern thing, which would make since since my grandparents were both from the south.

  27. ryan

      my mom always served both with applesauce, so i grew up thinking it was normal. i’ve heard it may be a southern thing, which would make since since my grandparents were both from the south.

  28. Ryan Call

      i lived in the south and never heard of that practice.

  29. Ryan Call

      i lived in the south and never heard of that practice.

  30. Ryan Call

      i dont think putting chips in sandwhiches is that weird. its almost perfect actually.

  31. Ryan Call

      i dont think putting chips in sandwhiches is that weird. its almost perfect actually.

  32. ryan

      Ryan, re: the applesauce, maybe my family has no excuse. either way, just thinking about applesauce and grilled cheese is making me hungry!

  33. ryan

      Ryan, re: the applesauce, maybe my family has no excuse. either way, just thinking about applesauce and grilled cheese is making me hungry!

  34. Matthew Simmons

      My favorite sandwich as a child:

      Tunafish (not tuna salad) on toast with melted butter, tabasco sauce, yellow mustard, and grated parmesan cheese.

      Second favorite:

      Toasted english muffin with butter, peanut butter, and Bacos.

      Haven’t had either of those in a while. For some reason, people often look at me funny when I put cheddar cheese and peanut butter together on toast. Does that seem odd to other people? I mean, it’s sort of a light, buttery kind of cheese.

  35. Matthew Simmons

      My favorite sandwich as a child:

      Tunafish (not tuna salad) on toast with melted butter, tabasco sauce, yellow mustard, and grated parmesan cheese.

      Second favorite:

      Toasted english muffin with butter, peanut butter, and Bacos.

      Haven’t had either of those in a while. For some reason, people often look at me funny when I put cheddar cheese and peanut butter together on toast. Does that seem odd to other people? I mean, it’s sort of a light, buttery kind of cheese.

  36. Lincoln

      first sandwich sounds great.

  37. Lincoln

      first sandwich sounds great.

  38. Ryan Call

      i sometimes hold water or coffee or beer or liquor in my mouth and forget to gulp it.

  39. Ryan Call

      i just ate a normal sandich of ham, cheese, and tomoato

  40. Ryan Call

      i sometimes hold water or coffee or beer or liquor in my mouth and forget to gulp it.

  41. Ryan Call

      i just ate a normal sandich of ham, cheese, and tomoato

  42. Ryan Call

      i think puting cheddar cheese and peabut butter together is a bit odd, yes.

  43. Ryan Call

      i think puting cheddar cheese and peabut butter together is a bit odd, yes.

  44. Lincoln

      Yeah, potato chips in sandwiches are standard fare. Come on, PR, show us the weird!

  45. Lincoln

      Yeah, potato chips in sandwiches are standard fare. Come on, PR, show us the weird!

  46. ryan

      i ate a sausage, egg & cheese hot pocket

  47. ryan

      i ate a sausage, egg & cheese hot pocket

  48. pr

      I eat cheese with peanut butter, but just sraight up, not in a sandwich. Just break out the cracker barrell and jar of peanut butter and go nuts-

      BTW- Matthew, those two sandwiches are pretty funny.

      In my mid twenties, I used to make onnion metls which consisted of onions and cheese, stuck in the toaster oven. My boyfriends thought that was gross.

  49. pr

      I had a turkey, mayo, lettuce (no tomoto) on wite toast with salt and vinegar chips mashed in it for lunch.

  50. pr

      on a piece of bread…

  51. pr

      yeah, you’re right. I was just getting started…I think I got more interesting as I went along, no?

  52. Lincoln

      but yeah, cheese and PB is weird.

  53. Lincoln

      but yeah, cheese and PB is weird.

  54. keith n b

      i eat the same exact food/meals day in and day out, i can’t even vary the brand. although that quirk is not by choice. anything else messes me up, my body’s ocd hardcore. i actually hate eating, but i’m hyperphagic and so have to do so often to keep the low-blood-sugar-like attacks in check and the shakes at bay. mostly potatoes. i eat at least 1lb of potatoes a day, usually more in between meals. i’m still scrawny.

  55. keith n b

      i eat the same exact food/meals day in and day out, i can’t even vary the brand. although that quirk is not by choice. anything else messes me up, my body’s ocd hardcore. i actually hate eating, but i’m hyperphagic and so have to do so often to keep the low-blood-sugar-like attacks in check and the shakes at bay. mostly potatoes. i eat at least 1lb of potatoes a day, usually more in between meals. i’m still scrawny.

  56. pr

      I lived off of maple yogurt when I was pregnant. the kind with a thick layer of cream on top. I forget the brand. I gained 60 pounds in my first pregnancy.
      I also mashed up potato chips in pineapple yogurt almost every day.

  57. pr

      not pineapple yogurt, cottage cheese with pineapple in it. that stuff.

  58. mike young

      apples and cheese are delicious

      this is like the inverse of a slice of american cheese on your apple pie, which is a new england practice, i think

  59. mike young

      apples and cheese are delicious

      this is like the inverse of a slice of american cheese on your apple pie, which is a new england practice, i think

  60. Lily

      i cover up my plate with a napkin whenever i’m done eating, but i only do this when i go out to eat. at home, i’m fine with looking at my eaten-off-of plate, but at restaurants, i can’t stand it. sometimes, people like to mock me by hiding the napkins so that i can’t cover my plate. as a word of warning, that’s pretty much a bad idea.

  61. Lily

      i cover up my plate with a napkin whenever i’m done eating, but i only do this when i go out to eat. at home, i’m fine with looking at my eaten-off-of plate, but at restaurants, i can’t stand it. sometimes, people like to mock me by hiding the napkins so that i can’t cover my plate. as a word of warning, that’s pretty much a bad idea.

  62. sasha fletcher

      i put ice in my milk
      i used to put peanut butter on my pizza.
      it was fucking awesome.

  63. sasha fletcher

      i put ice in my milk
      i used to put peanut butter on my pizza.
      it was fucking awesome.

  64. Matt Bell

      While I was finishing the first draft of a novel last year, I wrote nonstop for a weekend broken up only by ten hour work days and little sleep on a combination of Blue Moon and Red Bull in the same glass. I called it The Blue Ox, and it was delicious (unlike the novel draft.)

  65. Matt Bell

      While I was finishing the first draft of a novel last year, I wrote nonstop for a weekend broken up only by ten hour work days and little sleep on a combination of Blue Moon and Red Bull in the same glass. I called it The Blue Ox, and it was delicious (unlike the novel draft.)

  66. jereme

      word to that

  67. jereme

      word to that

  68. Vaughan Simons

      I’m not sure whether my near pathological hatred of lettuce, and a worrying addiction to Marmite Babybels that I should really seek therapy over, really count.

  69. Vaughan Simons

      I’m not sure whether my near pathological hatred of lettuce, and a worrying addiction to Marmite Babybels that I should really seek therapy over, really count.

  70. ryan

      what’s blue moon?

  71. ryan

      what’s blue moon?

  72. ryan

      when i was a kid i totally freaked if any of my food items touched each other (other than the ones that were supposed to go together, like a bun on a hamburger, etc)

  73. ryan

      when i was a kid i totally freaked if any of my food items touched each other (other than the ones that were supposed to go together, like a bun on a hamburger, etc)

  74. Aaron

      for the last 2 years i’ve been brewing green tea in a 44ounce yellow plastic dickey’s bbq cup, every day, and that i have washed in the washing machine only 5-6 times. i brew 2 green tea bags in it, drink, rinse it, air dry it. a noticeably black coat covers the sunflower yellow plastic; you can scrape it with your fingernail, though it doesn’t effect the taste. i like to think i’m “seasoning” the cup, like a castiron skillet or yixing tea pot. the truth: i have no idea why i do this. the washing machine’s 2 feet from where i dry the frickin cup!

      also, food: i sprikle louisiana red pepper sauce on salads to spice that thang up; othertimes i mix it in the dressing before applying it. for zing.

      i used to drip a spoon in peanut butter, dip that in chocolate chips then in puffins corn cereal and eat the mess as a lollypop when no one was in my apartment to see.

      i also used to share spoonfuls of puffins in soy milk w/ my pet ferret. that’s not a sexual euphemism either. family eats together, i say, even a trans-species family. (they also live alone, because who’d want to kiss that mouth.)

  75. Aaron

      for the last 2 years i’ve been brewing green tea in a 44ounce yellow plastic dickey’s bbq cup, every day, and that i have washed in the washing machine only 5-6 times. i brew 2 green tea bags in it, drink, rinse it, air dry it. a noticeably black coat covers the sunflower yellow plastic; you can scrape it with your fingernail, though it doesn’t effect the taste. i like to think i’m “seasoning” the cup, like a castiron skillet or yixing tea pot. the truth: i have no idea why i do this. the washing machine’s 2 feet from where i dry the frickin cup!

      also, food: i sprikle louisiana red pepper sauce on salads to spice that thang up; othertimes i mix it in the dressing before applying it. for zing.

      i used to drip a spoon in peanut butter, dip that in chocolate chips then in puffins corn cereal and eat the mess as a lollypop when no one was in my apartment to see.

      i also used to share spoonfuls of puffins in soy milk w/ my pet ferret. that’s not a sexual euphemism either. family eats together, i say, even a trans-species family. (they also live alone, because who’d want to kiss that mouth.)

  76. jereme

      let’s get decadent:

      as a kid i drank milk and coca cola mixed together. i thought it was a normal drink for special occasions like a shirley temple (which i love and still order). My granny waited until my mid-twenties to tell me it was her personal concoction to get me to drink nasty ass milk as a child

      peanut butter and pickle sandwiches. so good

      velveta shells and cheese/kraft mac n cheese (the good knid with the processed cheese in a bag) plus i add an entire loaf of cream cheese to it

      fried chicken gizzards and hearts

      ketchup on my tacos

      i refuse to acknowledge a martini made with vodka. it’s not a fucking martini unless it’s made with gin. one olive = elegant. two olives = good/fun three olives = a fucking meal. i will verbally abuse people drinking “dirty” martinis. just gross

      fried bologna sandwhiches

      spam masubi (only “weird” to white people”

      when eating a proper dinner i will save the meat to eat last because i value it the most and want to save it and “finish big”

      as a kid i would also pour tons of sugar into ice water

      bang a girl with otter pops and eat them after wards

      i don’t eat breakfast, however, eat cereal for dinner

      i am sure there are more

      i’m a weird dude

  77. jereme

      let’s get decadent:

      as a kid i drank milk and coca cola mixed together. i thought it was a normal drink for special occasions like a shirley temple (which i love and still order). My granny waited until my mid-twenties to tell me it was her personal concoction to get me to drink nasty ass milk as a child

      peanut butter and pickle sandwiches. so good

      velveta shells and cheese/kraft mac n cheese (the good knid with the processed cheese in a bag) plus i add an entire loaf of cream cheese to it

      fried chicken gizzards and hearts

      ketchup on my tacos

      i refuse to acknowledge a martini made with vodka. it’s not a fucking martini unless it’s made with gin. one olive = elegant. two olives = good/fun three olives = a fucking meal. i will verbally abuse people drinking “dirty” martinis. just gross

      fried bologna sandwhiches

      spam masubi (only “weird” to white people”

      when eating a proper dinner i will save the meat to eat last because i value it the most and want to save it and “finish big”

      as a kid i would also pour tons of sugar into ice water

      bang a girl with otter pops and eat them after wards

      i don’t eat breakfast, however, eat cereal for dinner

      i am sure there are more

      i’m a weird dude

  78. jereme

      me too. it still bothers the shit out of me

  79. jereme

      shitty beer or wine. i forget which.

  80. Matthew Simmons

      Though none of us have ever caught her doing it, my mother’s plates are so spotless at the end of any meal at a restaurant, we’re all fairly certain that, when the rest of us are distracted, she picks up the plate and licks it clean.

  81. jereme

      me too. it still bothers the shit out of me

  82. jereme

      shitty beer or wine. i forget which.

  83. Matthew Simmons

      Though none of us have ever caught her doing it, my mother’s plates are so spotless at the end of any meal at a restaurant, we’re all fairly certain that, when the rest of us are distracted, she picks up the plate and licks it clean.

  84. joe seife

      is this how far it’s come–“funny” food crap? fuck. Oh, fuck

  85. joe seife

      is this how far it’s come–“funny” food crap? fuck. Oh, fuck

  86. ryan

      shirley temples and roy rogers are the shit!

      and as far as breakfast for dinner that’s always a good choice. i make pancakes for dinner 3-5 times a week.

  87. ryan

      shirley temples and roy rogers are the shit!

      and as far as breakfast for dinner that’s always a good choice. i make pancakes for dinner 3-5 times a week.

  88. jereme

      oh that reminds me

      i abhor syrup. like it has some weird psychosomatic hold on me

      i’ll smell the syrup all day/night and freak out to the point where i’ll wash my hands about 15 times and stil smell it.

      ugh. i just dry heaved thinking about syrup.

  89. jereme

      oh that reminds me

      i abhor syrup. like it has some weird psychosomatic hold on me

      i’ll smell the syrup all day/night and freak out to the point where i’ll wash my hands about 15 times and stil smell it.

      ugh. i just dry heaved thinking about syrup.

  90. ryan

      sorry, my bad

  91. jereme

      how far what has come ?

      why don’t you go shit in your own mouth instead of shitting on every one here?

      who the fuck are you to criticize a light hearted conversation?

  92. ryan

      sorry, my bad

  93. jereme

      how far what has come ?

      why don’t you go shit in your own mouth instead of shitting on every one here?

      who the fuck are you to criticize a light hearted conversation?

  94. drew

      beer

  95. jereme

      hahaha that is awesome. you should set up a secret camera and catch her!

  96. drew

      i ate caviar once when i was 10 and thought it was disgusting.

  97. drew

      beer

  98. jereme

      hahaha that is awesome. you should set up a secret camera and catch her!

  99. drew

      i ate caviar once when i was 10 and thought it was disgusting.

  100. drew

      i used to put salt all over my apples. i don’t know if that’s weird or not.

  101. jereme

      peanut butter + * == $$$$$

  102. drew

      i used to put salt all over my apples. i don’t know if that’s weird or not.

  103. jereme

      peanut butter + * == $$$$$

  104. dave

      to lose weight of course. actually i heard the office folks did it years ago when they couldn’t get a “cake” scene right (they kept spitting out the cake during takes)

  105. dave

      to lose weight of course. actually i heard the office folks did it years ago when they couldn’t get a “cake” scene right (they kept spitting out the cake during takes)

  106. ryan

      my grandma used to do that, too. every afternoon while she watched Wheel of Fortune.

  107. ryan

      my grandma used to do that, too. every afternoon while she watched Wheel of Fortune.

  108. barry

      i put salt on my ice cream.

      i used to eat like 20-30 lady bugs a day. they taste minty if you crunch them and dont just swallow.

      when i was a teen i spent so much time in and out of lock-up, i used to eat (and see others eat) the most ridiculous food combos.

      ramen noodles / corn / cheese whiz

      tuna / fruit cocktail / rice

  109. barry

      i put salt on my ice cream.

      i used to eat like 20-30 lady bugs a day. they taste minty if you crunch them and dont just swallow.

      when i was a teen i spent so much time in and out of lock-up, i used to eat (and see others eat) the most ridiculous food combos.

      ramen noodles / corn / cheese whiz

      tuna / fruit cocktail / rice

  110. jereme

      HAHAHA HOLY SHIT RYAN. I used to have the “power hour” with my granny. Wheel of Fortune (or i always called it Wheel of Stupidity to get a rise out of her) and Jeopardy!.

      We would eat dinner on tv dinner tables. The wooden kind that were collapsible and designed so you could eat from a recliner chair while watching Wheel of Fortune.

  111. jereme

      HAHAHA HOLY SHIT RYAN. I used to have the “power hour” with my granny. Wheel of Fortune (or i always called it Wheel of Stupidity to get a rise out of her) and Jeopardy!.

      We would eat dinner on tv dinner tables. The wooden kind that were collapsible and designed so you could eat from a recliner chair while watching Wheel of Fortune.

  112. jereme

      “the spread”

  113. jereme

      “the spread”

  114. barry

      hahahahaha. me too. i think thats a memory from every kids childhood in america.

  115. barry

      hahahahaha. me too. i think thats a memory from every kids childhood in america.

  116. ryan

      yup, that sounds about right!

  117. ryan

      yup, that sounds about right!

  118. ryan

      she also salted watermelons

  119. ryan

      she also salted watermelons

  120. ryan

      how did i miss the otter pops thing? were you trying to make her taste better? that’s fantastic.

  121. ryan

      how did i miss the otter pops thing? were you trying to make her taste better? that’s fantastic.

  122. ryan

      i’m mostly over it. but things like putting a pickle next to my french fries? come on, no one wants a tainted (or soggified) fry.

  123. ryan

      i’m mostly over it. but things like putting a pickle next to my french fries? come on, no one wants a tainted (or soggified) fry.

  124. Ryan Call

      penut butter on pizza!

  125. Ryan Call

      penut butter on pizza!

  126. Ryan Call

      what makes yo uhate lettuce?

  127. Ryan Call

      what makes yo uhate lettuce?

  128. Ryan Call

      milk and coke. im going to try that.

  129. Ryan Call

      milk and coke. im going to try that.

  130. Ryan Call

      this is important serious literary stuff here.

  131. Ryan Call

      this is important serious literary stuff here.

  132. Adam R

      Drinking milk,
      with or without ice,
      is weird.

      Humans are the only people
      who do that
      with milk from other
      specieses.
      Unless
      I guess
      you make your cat do it.

  133. Adam R

      Drinking milk,
      with or without ice,
      is weird.

      Humans are the only people
      who do that
      with milk from other
      specieses.
      Unless
      I guess
      you make your cat do it.

  134. ryan

      i don’t like milk by itself. but with cookies, brownies, cereal, etc it’s damn tasty.

  135. ryan

      i don’t like milk by itself. but with cookies, brownies, cereal, etc it’s damn tasty.

  136. Sarah

      I once saw someone dump a package of peanuts into a coke and drink it.

  137. Sarah

      I once saw someone dump a package of peanuts into a coke and drink it.

  138. ryan

      now that’s odd.

  139. ryan

      now that’s odd.

  140. gena

      i like to pour worcestershire sauce into my hand and dip my finger in it and drink it

  141. gena

      i like to pour worcestershire sauce into my hand and dip my finger in it and drink it

  142. Jimmy Chen

      i put basil, tomatoes and mozzarella on bread, add some salt and olive oil, then i eat it while watching sean hannity, one of the last real americans

  143. Jimmy Chen

      i put basil, tomatoes and mozzarella on bread, add some salt and olive oil, then i eat it while watching sean hannity, one of the last real americans

  144. brandi

      whenever i eat a peach, i have to dig all the pulp out of the indentations of the seed, with a pair of tweezers or a toothpick or the thing i use to clean dirt out from under my nails.

      also, to clean my cell phone screen, i lick the screen and then wipe it on my knee. i know that’s not really eating, but ya know.

  145. brandi

      whenever i eat a peach, i have to dig all the pulp out of the indentations of the seed, with a pair of tweezers or a toothpick or the thing i use to clean dirt out from under my nails.

      also, to clean my cell phone screen, i lick the screen and then wipe it on my knee. i know that’s not really eating, but ya know.

  146. Matthew Simmons
  147. Matthew Simmons
  148. Matthew Simmons

      Also, I clean my apple by licking my apple. Then I eat my apple because my apple is clean. That’s another thing I do.

      Is that one weird?

  149. Matthew Simmons

      Also, I clean my apple by licking my apple. Then I eat my apple because my apple is clean. That’s another thing I do.

      Is that one weird?

  150. Matthew Simmons
  151. Matthew Simmons
  152. KevinS

      Dip French fries in a milkshake.

      Aqua Teen Hunger Force.

  153. KevinS

      Dip French fries in a milkshake.

      Aqua Teen Hunger Force.

  154. barry

      my daughters have been doing forever.

      my oldest likes applesauce sandwiches. but you wanna hear some hardcore shit. she ordered a mcchicken and put one of those chocolate chip cookies on it and smashed it.

  155. barry

      my daughters have been doing forever.

      my oldest likes applesauce sandwiches. but you wanna hear some hardcore shit. she ordered a mcchicken and put one of those chocolate chip cookies on it and smashed it.

  156. Jonny Ross

      french vanilla yogurt is freakin sweet, if you get the right brand such as olympia

      you haven’t lived until you’ve slathered some of that stuff on a lover’s ass and gone to town

      i’ve revealed too much

  157. Jonny Ross

      french vanilla yogurt is freakin sweet, if you get the right brand such as olympia

      you haven’t lived until you’ve slathered some of that stuff on a lover’s ass and gone to town

      i’ve revealed too much

  158. ryan

      you are full of wonderful links

  159. ryan

      you are full of wonderful links

  160. pr

      one of my son breaks into a sweat if his food touches each others

  161. pr

      I used to be a gin martini fascist and then I once drank 12 -14 of them in one night and- well- i can’t drink them anymore. Vodka now. I know its not a real martini. but there you have it.

  162. pr

      Goat’s milk is much more digestable to humans because they are closer in size to us. (Its similiar to human milk in make-up, unllike cows milk).

  163. sasha fletcher

      it was so good dude. it melted a little.

  164. sasha fletcher

      it was so good dude. it melted a little.

  165. sasha fletcher

      shut it robison

  166. sasha fletcher

      shut it robison

  167. cobweb

      Specifically the yogurt from the underside of the lid that has “congealed”.

      I use a rubber spatula for improved efficiency.

  168. cobweb

      Specifically the yogurt from the underside of the lid that has “congealed”.

      I use a rubber spatula for improved efficiency.

  169. Ryan Call

      no meatwad?

  170. Ryan Call

      no meatwad?

  171. Mark Doten

      peanut butter and cheese sandwich (always velveeta) and peanut butter and bologna sandwich, both learned from a parent, as a young child.

  172. Mark Doten

      peanut butter and cheese sandwich (always velveeta) and peanut butter and bologna sandwich, both learned from a parent, as a young child.

  173. kerri

      i have to eat all food with a knife and fork . . . that includes burgers, pittas, sandwiches . . .i cannot deal with a lack of cutlery . . . eek, i am a loon

  174. kerri

      i have to eat all food with a knife and fork . . . that includes burgers, pittas, sandwiches . . .i cannot deal with a lack of cutlery . . . eek, i am a loon

  175. Leigh

      When I was a waitress in New Mexico, a huge group of Jesus people from Wisconsin asked for that. I had to heat it up in the microwave for them and I almost lost it.

  176. Leigh

      When I was a waitress in New Mexico, a huge group of Jesus people from Wisconsin asked for that. I had to heat it up in the microwave for them and I almost lost it.

  177. Leigh

      After reading all this, I feel so normal.

  178. Leigh

      After reading all this, I feel so normal.

  179. Ryan Call

      i think i remember lily doing this when she visited

  180. Ryan Call

      i think i remember lily doing this when she visited

  181. <HTMLGIANT> > Blog Archive » STORIES by Scott McClanahan

      […] Often, when realistic fiction interests me – and it very often does- it must do what all art can do, and to quote the painter Lisa Yuskavage ( an idol of mine), prove that there is “not an uninteresting person alive.” Scott McClanahan’s collection, simply entitled STORIES (click here to buy) illuminates that concept. I realize this is in exact opposition to Christopher Higg’s  comment in his review of the Jello Horse by Matthew Simmons, where he wrote, “…but then again, so few real people are remarkably interesting.”  Now, we could quibble about remarkable versus not, but I’ll reiterate: I find it remarkable that I am alive, period, and the minutia of anyone’s life thrills me. (This is not to say  I don’t like some books better than others, or some people better than others, nor that there isn’t tons of crappy stuff passing off as literature. I’m just explaining a general worldview I adhere to.) And so the way I walk around this world is different than others, I understand that, because I walk around shocked, amused, moved to pity and rage and mostly baffled, in the most wonderful of ways, at how strange we all are (click here to read a thread that exemplifies our weirdness in regard to food.) […]