CONGRATULATIONS PORK!

Yes it is true!  The Bacon Explosion has won a BOOK PRIZE which is something that ALL of us want!  It just goes to show that BACON > US!  I hear that The Bacon Explosion has quite a way with language and its work was called “elegant and lucid, emotionally charged and precisely controlled,” by the National Book Critics Circle!  And that’s a circle I don’t want to mess with!  Hooray for Bacon Explosion!  AND the Bacon Explosion didn’t even have to die of liver failure like Roberto Bolaño to win this award!  Because everyone knows that the Bacon Explosion CAN’T DIE!  The Bacon Explosion was the inspiration for the modern children’s classic ‘Tuck Everlasting’!  It is the perfect example of humanity’s awareness of our own mortality and makes us comprehend our role in the world!  It’s so sad at the end of the book when the Bacon Explosion stands over Winnie’s grave!  It’s so ironic that we all want to live forever, but then when we do, we’re all like ‘no i don’t want to live forever!’ and then it’s kind of like that BORGES story where Connor MacLeod fights his first battle in the Scottish Highlands in 1536, but fights his greatest battle on the streets of New York City in 1986!

I have yet to read the Bacon Explosion’s book, but I’ve read a few of its short stories in various literary magazines which show its command of plot intricacies and deftness!  But I KNOW that the book is AWESOME and has lots of BACON SEX in it!  I hope that the Bacon Explosion draws a lot from PERSONAL EXPERIENCE because that’s what GOOD BOOKS DO!  Write what you know!  It worked for James Frey and Marie-Pier Côté (full circle…BOOK CIRCLE…incroyable!)

I’m going to CHECK IT OUT at my local library and put it on my Book It! list and get a PERSONAL PAN PIZZA!