October 28th, 2009 / 11:48 am
 Author Spotlight & Mean

Dan Nester Doubles Down on Mean: FUCK GERUNDS

gerund

Just fuck ’em.

Or better yet, let’s fucking fuck gerunds.

That way, it–the fucking–will keep going into the eternal present.

That is all.

—D.N.

Tags: ,

43 Comments

  1. October 28th, 2009 / 3:56 pm Matt Cozart—

      Yeah, also, fuck verbs, nouns, adjectives, adverbs, articles, prepositions, and conjunctions. Let’s all just sit quietly.

  2. October 28th, 2009 / 11:56 am Matt Cozart—

      Yeah, also, fuck verbs, nouns, adjectives, adverbs, articles, prepositions, and conjunctions. Let’s all just sit quietly.

  3. October 28th, 2009 / 3:59 pm davidpeak—

      best post of mean week

  4. October 28th, 2009 / 3:59 pm Mather Schneider—

      That’s the first thing that’s ever made me laugh on this site! Thanks Matt.

  5. October 28th, 2009 / 11:59 am davidpeak—

      best post of mean week

  6. October 28th, 2009 / 11:59 am Mather Schneider—

      That’s the first thing that’s ever made me laugh on this site! Thanks Matt.

  7. October 28th, 2009 / 4:19 pm davidpeak—

      y’all might want to read the third line again

  8. October 28th, 2009 / 12:19 pm davidpeak—

      y’all might want to read the third line again

  9. October 28th, 2009 / 4:21 pm Daniel Nester—

      Jesus Christ, Justin. I’m your fucking Deep Throat. I could get to love this.

      For the record: I feel much less ambivalent about fucking gerund that how lame the term lyric essay is.

  10. October 28th, 2009 / 12:21 pm Daniel Nester—

      Jesus Christ, Justin. I’m your fucking Deep Throat. I could get to love this.

      For the record: I feel much less ambivalent about fucking gerund that how lame the term lyric essay is.

  11. October 28th, 2009 / 4:22 pm Tim Jones-Yelvington—

      htmlgiant comment threads confuse me now b/c everybody is named Matt or David.

  12. October 28th, 2009 / 12:22 pm Tim Jones-Yelvington—

      htmlgiant comment threads confuse me now b/c everybody is named Matt or David.

  13. October 28th, 2009 / 4:24 pm Daniel Nester—

      There should be two em-dashes before and after “the fucking.”

  14. October 28th, 2009 / 12:24 pm Daniel Nester—

      There should be two em-dashes before and after “the fucking.”

  15. October 28th, 2009 / 4:33 pm mimi—

      Don’t worry about the names. Your favorites will start to pop out at you.
      I’ve gotten really good at skimming comments threads (and not just on HTML g). It’s my newest hobby/brain exercise/waste of time.

  16. October 28th, 2009 / 12:33 pm mimi—

      Don’t worry about the names. Your favorites will start to pop out at you.
      I’ve gotten really good at skimming comments threads (and not just on HTML g). It’s my newest hobby/brain exercise/waste of time.

  17. October 28th, 2009 / 4:54 pm Matt Cozart—

      I hear you, and I apologize. In the early ’80s every fourth male baby was named Matt. Same for David and Ryan.

  18. October 28th, 2009 / 12:54 pm Matt Cozart—

      I hear you, and I apologize. In the early ’80s every fourth male baby was named Matt. Same for David and Ryan.

  19. October 28th, 2009 / 5:32 pm Ryan Call—

      1983 baby

  20. October 28th, 2009 / 1:32 pm Ryan Call—

      1983 baby

  21. October 28th, 2009 / 5:33 pm davidpeak—

      me too!

  22. October 28th, 2009 / 1:33 pm davidpeak—

      me too!

  23. October 28th, 2009 / 5:36 pm Matt Cozart—

      ’82 for me. (conceived in ’81, for those of you keeping score at home.)

  24. October 28th, 2009 / 1:36 pm Matt Cozart—

      ’82 for me. (conceived in ’81, for those of you keeping score at home.)

  25. October 28th, 2009 / 5:37 pm Ryan Call—

      wonder how old ryan bradley is.

  26. October 28th, 2009 / 1:37 pm Ryan Call—

      wonder how old ryan bradley is.

  27. October 28th, 2009 / 5:48 pm Tim Jones-Yelvington—

      ’82 for me too

  28. October 28th, 2009 / 1:48 pm Tim Jones-Yelvington—

      ’82 for me too

  29. October 28th, 2009 / 5:49 pm Michael James—

      whats a gerund?

  30. October 28th, 2009 / 1:49 pm Michael James—

      whats a gerund?

  31. October 28th, 2009 / 6:34 pm john sakkis—

      this is a prose joke huh?

  32. October 28th, 2009 / 2:34 pm john sakkis—

      this is a prose joke huh?

  33. October 28th, 2009 / 7:11 pm Matthew Simmons—

      beat me to it.

  34. October 28th, 2009 / 3:11 pm Matthew Simmons—

      beat me to it.

  35. October 28th, 2009 / 8:51 pm Daniel Nester—

      Yeah. In non-prose, people calling gerunds a gerund is a way for non-prose writers’ keeping things in the fucking present tense all the time.

  36. October 28th, 2009 / 4:51 pm Daniel Nester—

      Yeah. In non-prose, people calling gerunds a gerund is a way for non-prose writers’ keeping things in the fucking present tense all the time.

  37. October 29th, 2009 / 12:14 am Blake Butler—

      you used a gerund in your post about how you hate gerunds

  38. October 28th, 2009 / 8:14 pm Blake Butler—

      you used a gerund in your post about how you hate gerunds

  39. October 29th, 2009 / 12:23 am Daniel Nester—

      Give the man a prize!

  40. October 28th, 2009 / 8:23 pm Daniel Nester—

      Give the man a prize!

  41. October 29th, 2009 / 10:01 am Merzmensch—

      May I join your noble swearing circle not beeing a native speaker?

  42. October 29th, 2009 / 6:01 am Merzmensch—

      May I join your noble swearing circle not beeing a native speaker?

  43. October 1st, 2012 / 8:02 pm How to Be Inappropriate round-up: Urban Outfitters, Writer’s Rainbow, Chronicle, TU, HTMLG. | DanielNester.com—

      […] At HTMLGIANT, I took a stand against fucking gerunds. […]