May 26th, 2010 / 3:22 pm
 Author Spotlight

We Are All Susceptible

On Twitter, Michael Kimball asked why zombies are so hungry. Maybe he’s doing research for a new book? Maybe it’s for

HAHAHAHAHA:

Dear Sara,
I’m sorry I came back to life and ate you and your new husband, Carl. It’s just that I can’t stop eating people. I suppose it isn’t all my fault, though. You should have known that I would be a fast zombie, after how good I was at track. Anyway, I have to go now because I hear there are some humans hiding out in the mall. Hey, maybe I’ll see you there?

Dear Dad,
Thanks for being so terrible all my life. Now I have something to be undead for. That’s right, something’s been gnawing at me, and pretty soon it’s going to be gnawing on you, too.

Dear What’s-Your-Face that I hit with my lunchbox,
I don’t care if it looked mean inside your head. All that blood must have been delicious.

Also see: How Much Of Us There Was to Eat, in which the grandmother pulls through . . . or does she?

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20 Comments

  1. May 26th, 2010 / 3:41 pm BAC—

      oh, that’s killer.

  2. May 26th, 2010 / 3:46 pm Adam Robinson—

      Oof. Good one.

  3. May 26th, 2010 / 4:06 pm Matthew Simmons—

      The Way The Family Got Away…from Zombies.

  4. May 26th, 2010 / 4:06 pm Matthew Simmons—

      60 Zombies/60 Places

  5. May 26th, 2010 / 4:22 pm Nathan Tyree—

      zombies are so 1999

      wait

      Maybe I’m so 1999

      But so is Prince

  6. May 26th, 2010 / 4:22 pm Adam Robinson—

      Seems like I Will Smash You comes ready-made.

  7. May 26th, 2010 / 4:55 pm Matthew Simmons—

      Yeah, seems so.

  8. May 26th, 2010 / 5:24 pm Gigi—

      This type of thought process frequently leads to incarceration, and rightfully so.

  9. May 26th, 2010 / 5:39 pm Joseph Young—

      Though a little bland– I Will Salt You.

      (or, I Will Salt-substitute You, for those with dietary restrictions).

  10. May 26th, 2010 / 6:15 pm Nathan Tyree—

      dane?

  11. May 26th, 2010 / 7:41 pm BAC—

      oh, that’s killer.

  12. May 26th, 2010 / 7:46 pm Adam Robinson—

      Oof. Good one.

  13. May 26th, 2010 / 8:06 pm Matthew Simmons—

      The Way The Family Got Away…from Zombies.

  14. May 26th, 2010 / 8:06 pm Matthew Simmons—

      60 Zombies/60 Places

  15. May 26th, 2010 / 8:22 pm Nathan Tyree—

      zombies are so 1999

      wait

      Maybe I’m so 1999

      But so is Prince

  16. May 26th, 2010 / 8:22 pm Adam Robinson—

      Seems like I Will Smash You comes ready-made.

  17. May 26th, 2010 / 8:55 pm Matthew Simmons—

      Yeah, seems so.

  18. May 26th, 2010 / 9:24 pm Gigi—

      This type of thought process frequently leads to incarceration, and rightfully so.

  19. May 26th, 2010 / 9:39 pm Joseph Young—

      Though a little bland– I Will Salt You.

      (or, I Will Salt-substitute You, for those with dietary restrictions).

  20. May 26th, 2010 / 10:15 pm Nathan Tyree—

      dane?