September 24th, 2010 / 11:40 pm

from the 1900 page suicide note of Mitchell Heisman

It is a test of whether America can be true to itself.

The first superhuman AI might merge all of the computational power on the internet into its own power, master all of the significant information on the internet, and then reorganize the entire global brain of the internet so that it “wakes up” as the global mind of God.

From this late biological phase, I count myself as, among other things, genetic replicator, eukaryote, animal, vertebrate, gnathostome, chordate, mammal, primate, ape, Homo sapien, and Jew.

I took Gilbert’s recording of Bach’s Well Tempered Clavier, eliminated all time gaps between the tracks, and listened repeatedly in a loop.

But wait a minute. Why am I doing this? Ah, yes, now I remember the punchline:

I’ll try anything once!

(according to Mitchell’s wishes, the website will be ‘kept up as is, free for access for all’)

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  1. Brad Green

      The word I occurs 1008 times in that document.

  2. Guest

      I don’t understand why he killed himself. I can understand “life” not being “preferable” to “death,” but why take any action… Why do anything…

  3. michael

      only one I every couple of pages is pretty remarkable for a suicide note.

  4. michael

      i hate suicide notes. at their worst they’re unreadable jabbering, and at best they’re convincing. lose-lose.

  5. Donald

      To continue to live is to “do”. That the basic functions and actions of life are involuntary is irrelevant. Allowing the continuance of an action is tantamount to carrying it out; when you’re also the one whose actions are being allowed to continue, it is not only tantamount, but absolutely identical. So, the choice is between one action and another (host of) action(s), not between action and inaction.

  6. Donald

      this sounds amazing — I mean, I’m fascinated by it. I’m going to try to read the whole thing. I suppose it’d take me a few years, since I’ll just be squeezing it in between all of my other stuff, and I’ll almost certainly abandon the project, but whatever.

  7. RyanPard

      “The Seditious Genius of the Spiritual Penis of Jesus”

      This is awesome. I think I’ll read the whole thing too, if I can get it in a more comfortable format. Does Amazon still charge to transport pdf’s to the kindle?

  8. reynard seifert

      if patrick bateman were a terminator

  9. Guest

      Yeah. 1008 in 1900 pages seems like a low number.

  10. Kyle Minor

      Ken, can you give any context for this thing? At first I thought it would be a joke (or a new Chris Higgs project), but it’s 1900 pages, and it seems like somebody’s life’s work, strange though it is.

  11. Jonny Ross

      well he was *in* the last Terminator…

  12. Ken Baumann
  13. Kyle Minor

      Thanks, Ken.

  14. P. H. Madore

      A firearm discharging on a prestigious college campus should be major national news, regardless of circumstances. Perhaps I don’t keep up with the news very much, but this one sure does seem to be taking its time to reach the halls of the likes of the New York Post. Why is that? Perhaps some of his premises are on point, is all I’m saying.

  15. jereme

      suicide is an act of anger

  16. jereme

      suicide is an act of anger

  17. Owen Kaelin

      Suicide literature ought to be the next big thing.

  18. Owen Kaelin

      No, it’s not.

  19. Owen Kaelin

      Suicide literature ought to be the next big thing.

  20. Owen Kaelin

      You’ve said this before and never explained. I honestly don’t see it.

  21. reynard seifert

      to be honest with you, jonny, i did not know that. in fact, i thought shia labeef was in the last one. after googling it, i realized i must have been thinking of transformers or indiana jones or maybe both, both involve aliens i think. also, i just found out 9/11 was an inside job. these internets are crazy!

  22. Owen Kaelin

      You know… a coworker once told me that what happens in Somerville stays in Somerville. I guess that theory’s been shot to pieces.

      No pun intended.

  23. Ajrdch

      Remarkably well written. What a shame.

  24. Guest

      did you read it

      doesn’t it say that it’s not a “shame”

      doesn’t it say that dying isn’t bad

  25. Sam Walker

      The font’s big.

  26. Owen Kaelin

      Yes. Exactly.

      It was his choice. There’s nothing at all inherently ‘bad’ about suicide. It might make us sad, but that doesn’t mean it was necessarily the ‘wrong’ thing for the person to do.

  27. Synthysys666

      I personally think that suicide is very un-American. Its something that the Japanese have taken to a higher art form… Kamikaze’s that Seppuku ritual etc. But in America usually when someone snaps they go to some gun show and buy some guns and go into their last job or school and take out a couple of dozen people or so. That’s the American way of blowing up and snapping. Frankly I find suicide kind of cowardly and would only consider it only in extreme conditions… like if I was slowly starving to death, or trapped in a burning building, or facing extreme torture. I guess those things could be the physical manifestations of some peoples psychological travails. I plan on reading this book too. But I don’t know if I can find the time. Between work and my daily routines, I don’t have that much time.