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snd me ur txt msgs, plz?
Everyone, I thought it might be fun to get your help on this. For the Dollar Store Super Summer Tour, I’m scheduled to read for 5mins in Houston this Monday with Gene Morgan and others. The dollar store item that I received is in the above picture. It is an elephant cellular phone holster that attaches to my belt or hangs around my neck. This holster gave me the idea to ask you to email me favorite text messages you have sent or received. I would like to combine these text messages into poems/stories/texts/things to read at the Dollar Store Show Tour at Domy Books on Monday night. I promise to post the things at HTMLGIANT after the event so that everyone can read them.
I think this could be fun? Please email the exact text message, with text message language intact, to htmlgiant [at] gmail [dot] com – use subject $ STORE SHOW or DOLLAR STORE SHOW or something like that. I will take whatever I can get through like 10pm CST tonight. I will try to use every line I receive. I hope this works.
Oh, new idea: or you can also post them in the comments section. That might be fun also. Then other people can play with them too, maybe? The point is this should be really messy.
Tags: Dollar Store Show, Domy Books
1.21.08 1241am: I almost called but it was cold and the sun was setting and i was afraid that you may have fangs
10.16.09 1215am: YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
10.20.09 346pm: For Halloween I am going as the Defenestration of Prague.
12.8.08 1056pm: Thats sweet. The holocaust makes me blush a little too.
3.4.09 1054pm: My 21bday i went to cheesecake factory with two fat girls i barely knew and then cried myself to sleep because i had just broken up with my bf of 4 years
4.14.09 415pm: Oh you lolcat
4.15.09 1140pm: I think my hair is rotting & i think my legs are melting. I mean i’m pretty sure, but that’s probably an exaggeration.
5.6.09 1019am: Um, reading the verb, not the noun.
5.10.09 509pm: Look, I was not raised on polenta or wild baby acorns, but it doesn’t make me dangerous
5.10.09 512pm: And above all you set things on fire, and then lose them in a bet to me
5.22.09 1034am: I GOT BITTEN BY A SNAPPING TURTLE
5.27.09 1217am: Tom’s of Camden. It was the discounted version.
5.27.09 1220am: Will you love me even when I’m still not funny?
1.21.08 1241am: I almost called but it was cold and the sun was setting and i was afraid that you may have fangs
10.16.09 1215am: YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
10.20.09 346pm: For Halloween I am going as the Defenestration of Prague.
12.8.08 1056pm: Thats sweet. The holocaust makes me blush a little too.
3.4.09 1054pm: My 21bday i went to cheesecake factory with two fat girls i barely knew and then cried myself to sleep because i had just broken up with my bf of 4 years
4.14.09 415pm: Oh you lolcat
4.15.09 1140pm: I think my hair is rotting & i think my legs are melting. I mean i’m pretty sure, but that’s probably an exaggeration.
5.6.09 1019am: Um, reading the verb, not the noun.
5.10.09 509pm: Look, I was not raised on polenta or wild baby acorns, but it doesn’t make me dangerous
5.10.09 512pm: And above all you set things on fire, and then lose them in a bet to me
5.22.09 1034am: I GOT BITTEN BY A SNAPPING TURTLE
5.27.09 1217am: Tom’s of Camden. It was the discounted version.
5.27.09 1220am: Will you love me even when I’m still not funny?
9:15 Wow. Big splosions last night
9:20 Huh?
9:30 oops. Wrong person
9:15 Wow. Big splosions last night
9:20 Huh?
9:30 oops. Wrong person
June 29
1:00 PM L.A. time
I find it unacceptable that you
will not consumate my life
long love for you. Btw- if it’s
ass u like….I have one too
Didn’t mean2 sound
offensive:) rememberchow
you used to spit- I wanted to
slurp it up…and I
masterbated2u 4fucking
yrs! tell ur boytoy that! ….lol..
I’m gonna do what I should
have done yrs ago…rape u
June 29
1:00 PM L.A. time
I find it unacceptable that you
will not consumate my life
long love for you. Btw- if it’s
ass u like….I have one too
Didn’t mean2 sound
offensive:) rememberchow
you used to spit- I wanted to
slurp it up…and I
masterbated2u 4fucking
yrs! tell ur boytoy that! ….lol..
I’m gonna do what I should
have done yrs ago…rape u
June 2, 2009 2:10 PM
I’m destroying the bathroom while you pass gas in Morningside Heights
I’m passing gas on cat faces
That’s okay, they passed gas on your face when you were asleep
Explains the extra fierce morning breath
June 2, 2009 10:27 AM
Leonard Choen was really good
Not as good as Susan Boyle
She’ll always be the one who set my standards WAY too high. Damn her!
The boner that no other boner can out-bone
That girl’s got nice tonsils
This poo is extra stanky
Put some in a jar for later
That would be selfish; no, I’d rather let it be my gift to the world
As all the lonely jars in the world shed tears of neglect
Can’t please everyone, not even with a poo this stanky
Too bad there aren’t double toilets in there. We could hold hands and make stanky poos together. As one
You should become an architect
An asstronaut
I got nothing
Booyah. Dawg.
June 2, 2009 2:10 PM
I’m destroying the bathroom while you pass gas in Morningside Heights
I’m passing gas on cat faces
That’s okay, they passed gas on your face when you were asleep
Explains the extra fierce morning breath
June 2, 2009 10:27 AM
Leonard Choen was really good
Not as good as Susan Boyle
She’ll always be the one who set my standards WAY too high. Damn her!
The boner that no other boner can out-bone
That girl’s got nice tonsils
This poo is extra stanky
Put some in a jar for later
That would be selfish; no, I’d rather let it be my gift to the world
As all the lonely jars in the world shed tears of neglect
Can’t please everyone, not even with a poo this stanky
Too bad there aren’t double toilets in there. We could hold hands and make stanky poos together. As one
You should become an architect
An asstronaut
I got nothing
Booyah. Dawg.
I think that cat is planning my death
I think that cat is planning my death
Jul 3, 09 (Fri) 4:09 pm: Balls 2 the wallz
Jul 1, 09 (Wed) 9:11 pm: Snakes. Punks. Ground-bloom flowerz?
Jun 17, 09 (Wed) 6:51 pm: Sometimes i write a song i like, then i find some beer.
Jul 3, 09 (Fri) 4:09 pm: Balls 2 the wallz
Jul 1, 09 (Wed) 9:11 pm: Snakes. Punks. Ground-bloom flowerz?
Jun 17, 09 (Wed) 6:51 pm: Sometimes i write a song i like, then i find some beer.
This makes me miss Richard Brautigan.
This makes me miss Richard Brautigan.
its nice to know no matter how good/bad the writer is, texting can bowl us all down into the same pot.
still, this is some funny shit. and kinda good/bad too.
its nice to know no matter how good/bad the writer is, texting can bowl us all down into the same pot.
still, this is some funny shit. and kinda good/bad too.
I agree with the Defenestration of Prague.
I agree with the Defenestration of Prague.
Texts From Last Night
Texts From Last Night
(717): he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Victory for the Forces of Democratic Freedom!
(717): he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Victory for the Forces of Democratic Freedom!
cute.
cute.
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