Let’s get old | HTMLGIANT

August 20th, 2010 / 5:43 pm Matthew Simmons—

They used to kill

in old vaudeville.

August 20th, 2010 / 6:59 pm herocious—

here they are again in 2010

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lAsyOmoG70&feature=player_embedded

playing to a much larger audience. this act + butt slap got them on good morning america.

August 20th, 2010 / 8:19 pm Kristen Iskandrian—

aw. for real.

August 20th, 2010 / 9:13 pm Sean—

Seems like the response someone would have if two 5 years olds did the same, on video.

Something to think about.

I’ve worked retirement homes. Everyone there–70, 80, 90–cooed at like they are toddlers.

I don’t like it. Rules, cooing, guiding them from post-2-post. FUCK those homes. Cubicles of shadows and nevermore.

my 2.4 cents

August 20th, 2010 / 9:43 pm Matthew Simmons—

They used to kill

in old vaudeville.

August 20th, 2010 / 10:52 pm kev o—

These kids rock.

August 20th, 2010 / 11:00 pm Owen Kaelin—

Smash the bench! Smash the bench!

August 21st, 2010 / 12:25 am Matthew Simmons—

Marlow and Fran sold out. It used to be about the music for the two of them.

Also, why does some asshole always have to start clapping in time to the music?

August 21st, 2010 / 1:13 am Sean—

Seems like the response someone would have if two 5 years olds did the same, on video.

Something to think about.

I’ve worked retirement homes. Everyone there–70, 80, 90–cooed at like they are toddlers.

I don’t like it. Rules, cooing, guiding them from post-2-post. FUCK those homes. Cubicles of shadows and nevermore.

my 2.4 cents

August 21st, 2010 / 2:10 am mimi—

i just googled ‘i love old people they’re crazy’ a line from the tennessee williams/elia kazan screwball gothic film ‘baby doll’ (a film in my ‘top five fav films of all time’) and came across this blog ‘oasis’ with weird interesting posts by a ‘super duck’

for example:

http://www.oasisjournals.com/2010/07/crazy-teeth-and-old-people-homes

and super duck can really write, really has a voice

and i am drinking vodka
so this comment is cross-referential
because
it’s friday night
and
sean posted

August 21st, 2010 / 3:34 am Steven Augustine—

I wrote something, once, that was based on my experience working in the old folks home (this doesn’t include the part where an old man drowned because an aide stepped out to have a cigarette while the guy was in a bathtub):

“They were in a private room with a fat little woman circled by aides. Very much like a half-hearted gang-rape in which no one wanted to be first. The old woman (a card on the door called her Lilly Shaw) was clutching a bathrobe to her chest but otherwise naked, a baggy profusion of time-bleached meat. Keith told Kim to get her in those backless pyjamas and he took the other aides with him to whatever pointless emergency was next on the list. Lilly Shaw’s eyes were frantic but not really, as though she kept forgetting what “frantic” meant. Next was a thin white spider missing most of his legs and afraid to budge from the corner behind the safety toilet and the aluminum handholds and everything else smeared with his shiny tar shits. Next was a force-feeding on the theme of pureèd corn. Second childhood is not an empty figure of speech, mused Kim. But children are learning things.

“And every time she stepped into the curving, overlit hallway to approach the next task on the time-coded (in increments down to the second) checklist in her pocket, Ole Zack grabbed her into a loopy waltz, pleading into her eyes his transmission of chaos from the great beyond until Keith came jogging to separate them. Kim was assigned the task of bullying a lucid woman (in fact she looked strikingly like Kim’s career guidance counselor, Miss Brandischauer) into brushing her teeth before lights-out. Brushing-her-teeth as a euphemism for dealing with the dentures. The alternative-universe Miss Brandischauer was sitting in bed, reading Agatha Christie, peering down a long nose through her feline glasses when Keith ushered Kim into the book-filled room without knocking. Keith told Kim, in front of Miss Brandischauer 2, that the 75-year-old woman was a naughty girl who didn’t like to brush her teeth and that Kim shouldn’t take no for an answer, whatever excuses the old girl managed to cook up and don’t forget, now, you’re new, girl, so she’ll try to fool you.”

http://staugustine2.wordpress.com/2010/04/23/the-endless-thread-6-0/#comment-3220

August 21st, 2010 / 7:19 am Sean—

Steven, that’s damn good.

August 21st, 2010 / 7:34 am Steven Augustine—

I wrote something, once, that was based on my experience working in the old folks home (this doesn’t include the part where an old man drowned because an aide stepped out to have a cigarette while the guy was in a bathtub):

“They were in a private room with a fat little woman circled by aides. Very much like a half-hearted gang-rape in which no one wanted to be first. The old woman (a card on the door called her Lilly Shaw) was clutching a bathrobe to her chest but otherwise naked, a baggy profusion of time-bleached meat. Keith told Kim to get her in those backless pyjamas and he took the other aides with him to whatever pointless emergency was next on the list. Lilly Shaw’s eyes were frantic but not really, as though she kept forgetting what “frantic” meant. Next was a thin white spider missing most of his legs and afraid to budge from the corner behind the safety toilet and the aluminum handholds and everything else smeared with his shiny tar shits. Next was a force-feeding on the theme of pureèd corn. Second childhood is not an empty figure of speech, mused Kim. But children are learning things.

“And every time she stepped into the curving, overlit hallway to approach the next task on the time-coded (in increments down to the second) checklist in her pocket, Ole Zack grabbed her into a loopy waltz, pleading into her eyes his transmission of chaos from the great beyond until Keith came jogging to separate them. Kim was assigned the task of bullying a lucid woman (in fact she looked strikingly like Kim’s career guidance counselor, Miss Brandischauer) into brushing her teeth before lights-out. Brushing-her-teeth as a euphemism for dealing with the dentures. The alternative-universe Miss Brandischauer was sitting in bed, reading Agatha Christie, peering down a long nose through her feline glasses when Keith ushered Kim into the book-filled room without knocking. Keith told Kim, in front of Miss Brandischauer 2, that the 75-year-old woman was a naughty girl who didn’t like to brush her teeth and that Kim shouldn’t take no for an answer, whatever excuses the old girl managed to cook up and don’t forget, now, you’re new, girl, so she’ll try to fool you.”

http://staugustine2.wordpress.com/2010/04/23/the-endless-thread-6-0/#comment-3220

August 21st, 2010 / 11:19 am Sean—

Steven, that’s damn good.

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