Jimmy Chen—
Sorry but I wrote a haiku between Cornel West‘s front teeth, seemed like a good place for one.
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Meta
Cornel West is alternately brilliant and completely full of shit, cf. Examined Life. Sometimes he just strings neologisms together, hoping that the other person listening won’t notice that his rap is bordering on the parodic, like he’s some cracked-out superpimp trying to recruit whores for his operation in Atlantis.
Cornel West is alternately brilliant and completely full of shit, cf. Examined Life. Sometimes he just strings neologisms together, hoping that the other person listening won’t notice that his rap is bordering on the parodic, like he’s some cracked-out superpimp trying to recruit whores for his operation in Atlantis.
This seems like something Mark Baumer would do. The concept, not the poem, necessarily. though I have to admit I haven’t read any of his poetry, just his mfa blog. this comment is useless. I am insulting it before it can be insulted. almost meta. probably not.
This seems like something Mark Baumer would do. The concept, not the poem, necessarily. though I have to admit I haven’t read any of his poetry, just his mfa blog. this comment is useless. I am insulting it before it can be insulted. almost meta. probably not.
i have no strong feelings towards west, though i think he’s very eloquent
i have no strong feelings towards west, though i think he’s very eloquent
mark baumer is better than me, his mfa blog is insane
mark baumer is better than me, his mfa blog is insane
sweet
sweet
maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad props
maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad props
it’s in the gap between his teeth!
it’s in the gap between his teeth!
I dig this.
I dig this.
oh jimmy, don’t sell yourself short.
oh jimmy, don’t sell yourself short.
Something’s in the way.
Something’s in the way.
O
M
G
(and I never use those letters at once — never)
O
M
G
(and I never use those letters at once — never)
Seventeen syllables between the teeth of west and the poem isn’t east enough to borrow the form.
Seventeen syllables between the teeth of west and the poem isn’t east enough to borrow the form.
this is solid
this is solid
Great, but I wish the picture wasn’t blurry. Can you find a better picture?
Great, but I wish the picture wasn’t blurry. Can you find a better picture?
hi trey…i’ve never written poetry…i tried to write some breakup poetry just now…this is what happened:
dear baby #1,
oh, pebble oatmeal i should not have snorted you
ovalnoods are growing on you
i am you i am an ovalnood
please don’t pick me and flake my grizzle
i’ll be quiet and not seep your itch
someone please crawl up my brain
someone please feed my stomach while i’m gone
ovalnoods aren’t really oval
i found one and ate it and now i’m an ovalnood
click my flake, but don’t pick my grizzle
dear baby #2,
i climbed into your corvette and slept on its pussy cushion
there are two kinds of growths
i’m the kind that you find asleep in your pillowcase
you said your last boyfriend filled your pillows with quiet poop
i hope you don’t think i’m a bacterial eruption
dear baby #3,
touch me in the jacuzzi
wear leather jackets in the shower
put my pleated khakis on the clothesline
ogre my thai food buffet
spoon feed me things i’m embarrassed to eat alone
dear baby #4,
my jeans have an expiration date
at some point they’ll turn into ovalnoods
if you get a rash on your face
talk to a mumble professor
sip my tits
rats poop on canned sodas
use a straw
dear baby #5,
lets name our baby ‘courtney’
i want to be the type of man
that puts depression into your pantyhose
did you sniff my canned ovalnoods
put my gym shorts in a sack
oh no, we got down syndrome courtneys
dear baby #6,
i think i saw a picture of you in my cereal box
is your mom on the p.t.a.g.m.y.
portable typewriters are grizzling my yogurts
your mother is pygmy
her average height is low
dear baby # 7,
you tasted my nips yet?
use a straw if you find one in your pillow
i rubbed my nips on your ex-boyfriends quiet spot
he said, ‘touch my soft treatments’
i heard you got porcelain nose jewels
dear baby #8,
my last girlie said, ‘corrode my pennies’
she said, ‘if you’re thirsty buy my juice,’
‘smoke my lightbulbs’
‘sniffle into my ping pongs’
‘buy white fences with my penny collection
dear baby #9,
black suede in the 12:45 clock phase
roll twelve barrels into a corner and laugh at them
fat ankles said you said you sucked him
fat ankles said your girlie sipped these tits
fat ankles wrote ‘OMG’ on your forehead
dear baby #10,
my last girlie wouldn’t touch my oven mits
i hid my ovalnoods in a box up the chimney
plant your christmas tree in my ovalnoods
stuff your tree in my burn closet
coca-cola is a product in my ovalnoods
dear baby #11,
i want to live in your dilapidated frying pan
you’ve got a high modem of technology
put your coffee grinds on my linksys
are you into eco-friendly pleasure techtronics?
my ovalnoods are eco-friendly
dear baby #12,
someone began a nasty rumor about you
they said my ovalnoods leak marmalade
they said you butter toast your pillows
i heard you phoned my ovaldones
do you wear your pillow on the bus?
dear baby #pubkin pawty,
my nipdroolz said you grinded them
i was at the stool docks all night
too many dirty nutz in the club
i ate canned turkey loaf out of champagne bottles
you said i tasted like pillow loaf
dear baby #14,
i heard you bought some fake ovalnoobs
and clipped them to your boobs
when an artic tank is made of floss
my ovalnoods leak crater moss
dear baby #15,
i was lonely because you said you were coming over
but then you called and said you had to fix your pillowz
i ordered a pizza
and watched a movie about oven juice
my ovalnoods ate the dough toys
dear baby #16,
i wanted to put a bleb in your quiet spot
but i got nervous and lost the bleb
you blebbed on my ovals
when I got home they were dark and seeped
my overalls got tired and went to sleep
hi trey…i’ve never written poetry…i tried to write some breakup poetry just now…this is what happened:
dear baby #1,
oh, pebble oatmeal i should not have snorted you
ovalnoods are growing on you
i am you i am an ovalnood
please don’t pick me and flake my grizzle
i’ll be quiet and not seep your itch
someone please crawl up my brain
someone please feed my stomach while i’m gone
ovalnoods aren’t really oval
i found one and ate it and now i’m an ovalnood
click my flake, but don’t pick my grizzle
dear baby #2,
i climbed into your corvette and slept on its pussy cushion
there are two kinds of growths
i’m the kind that you find asleep in your pillowcase
you said your last boyfriend filled your pillows with quiet poop
i hope you don’t think i’m a bacterial eruption
dear baby #3,
touch me in the jacuzzi
wear leather jackets in the shower
put my pleated khakis on the clothesline
ogre my thai food buffet
spoon feed me things i’m embarrassed to eat alone
dear baby #4,
my jeans have an expiration date
at some point they’ll turn into ovalnoods
if you get a rash on your face
talk to a mumble professor
sip my tits
rats poop on canned sodas
use a straw
dear baby #5,
lets name our baby ‘courtney’
i want to be the type of man
that puts depression into your pantyhose
did you sniff my canned ovalnoods
put my gym shorts in a sack
oh no, we got down syndrome courtneys
dear baby #6,
i think i saw a picture of you in my cereal box
is your mom on the p.t.a.g.m.y.
portable typewriters are grizzling my yogurts
your mother is pygmy
her average height is low
dear baby # 7,
you tasted my nips yet?
use a straw if you find one in your pillow
i rubbed my nips on your ex-boyfriends quiet spot
he said, ‘touch my soft treatments’
i heard you got porcelain nose jewels
dear baby #8,
my last girlie said, ‘corrode my pennies’
she said, ‘if you’re thirsty buy my juice,’
‘smoke my lightbulbs’
‘sniffle into my ping pongs’
‘buy white fences with my penny collection
dear baby #9,
black suede in the 12:45 clock phase
roll twelve barrels into a corner and laugh at them
fat ankles said you said you sucked him
fat ankles said your girlie sipped these tits
fat ankles wrote ‘OMG’ on your forehead
dear baby #10,
my last girlie wouldn’t touch my oven mits
i hid my ovalnoods in a box up the chimney
plant your christmas tree in my ovalnoods
stuff your tree in my burn closet
coca-cola is a product in my ovalnoods
dear baby #11,
i want to live in your dilapidated frying pan
you’ve got a high modem of technology
put your coffee grinds on my linksys
are you into eco-friendly pleasure techtronics?
my ovalnoods are eco-friendly
dear baby #12,
someone began a nasty rumor about you
they said my ovalnoods leak marmalade
they said you butter toast your pillows
i heard you phoned my ovaldones
do you wear your pillow on the bus?
dear baby #pubkin pawty,
my nipdroolz said you grinded them
i was at the stool docks all night
too many dirty nutz in the club
i ate canned turkey loaf out of champagne bottles
you said i tasted like pillow loaf
dear baby #14,
i heard you bought some fake ovalnoobs
and clipped them to your boobs
when an artic tank is made of floss
my ovalnoods leak crater moss
dear baby #15,
i was lonely because you said you were coming over
but then you called and said you had to fix your pillowz
i ordered a pizza
and watched a movie about oven juice
my ovalnoods ate the dough toys
dear baby #16,
i wanted to put a bleb in your quiet spot
but i got nervous and lost the bleb
you blebbed on my ovals
when I got home they were dark and seeped
my overalls got tired and went to sleep
ovalnoods, pillowz, yeah
ovalnoods, pillowz, yeah