The full text of Wallace Shawn’s monologue The Fever is available on the internet.

This holiday season I am wondering all the deep things.

What is your favorite Rihanna song and why?

(honesty appreciated, but not a prereq.)

when in life have you felt most alone?

can you tell me abt yr first kiss?

is there something you’ve never told anyone but want to say now?

have u experienced any miracles?

what wuz the most profound spiritual moment of yr life?

what have you learned?

why bother?