[The tournament is back on! It will be decided before the 1 year anniversary of the tournament!– ed.]

[matchup #48 in Tournament of Bookshit]

i’m not on facebook, cause i guess i’m like THAT GUY or whatever, so what happened is that my gf gave me her login info so that i could browse it and be able to accurately judge this battle but all i did was look at her emails and private messages, and, like, pictures of dudes who comment on her pictures and also i looked at pictures of attractive women who seemed to show up a lot in general. but right now i can’t think of a single thing worse than facebook-based political ‘activism’ such as the bunch of posts i couldn’t help seeing that attempted to ‘deal with the problem’ of animal suffering and eating meat re thanksgiving and veganism. i maybe half respected the lady on the street who yelled “make the leap, go vegan!” at me as i passed but what i did on thanksgiving was sneak downstairs late after dinner and eat cold turkey by the light of the refrigerator, thinking of her. do i even have to mention ows here or can i just ignore it the same way everyone ignored the local elections last month?

litblogging at age 35 seems fine since nobody cares about lit blogs and nobody cares about 35 year olds. it’s cool to be 20-something and even early 30s can be good because you get a fair amount of pity but at 35 everyone knows you’re well past being interested in anything anymore so you lose plausible deniability that the reason you’re blogging at all is anything but an attempt at getting new kinds of laid. we can all let that slide since we’re americans and the pursuit of happiness is something we grant everyone equally and 35 year olds are not yet a protected minority, though probably they should be because there maybe isn’t a single worse thing that can happen to you in life than simply just being 35.

– Matthew Savoca

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WINNER: facebook-based political ‘activism’