Craft Notes
Youtube teaches me something about writing.
Let’s talk about flat affect in a writer’s tone. But first, let’s watch Beyonce:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mVEGfH4s5g
All right. Well, that was awesome. Know what’s not awesome? This:
httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIr8-f2OWhs
Seriously? I mean, I get a “neutral facial expression,” sometimes—I even wear one now and again—but what the fuck was that?
(And what the fuck is she looking at? What the hell is going on off camera that she keeps checking out? Can I watch that instead?)
A flat affect in a writer’s tone can be appropriate. Can be skillfully used. Can be funny. Can be enjoyable. And some of you out there are doing a fine job with it. Keep up the good work.
BUT some of you should probably try to avoid that shit. And I think comparing the videos illustrates it pretty well. Heck, watch them with the sound off. They both are enjoyable enough to listen to—though, you know, one bangs and the other is a little twee. The twee one has its charms.
I’m just saying, sometimes when you understate something, you are instead saying absolutely nothing. And I say nothing to myself all day long. I don’t need to read your book to add your nothing to my nothing. I’m old and I’m going to die some day. If you have nothing to say, stop putting it on paper.
The main difference between the two is that Beyonce is hot as shit and the indie girl is not.
The main difference between the two is that Beyonce is hot as shit and the indie girl is not.
she looks like Ashley Merriman from Top Chef Las Vegas…in a bad way.
she looks like Ashley Merriman from Top Chef Las Vegas…in a bad way.
Let’s be honest, Beyonce’s moves are way awesomer than that girl’s, but the difference between the videos isn’t just ‘neutral face expression.’ Beyonce’s video is all about production values and hiding things and big and exciting, whereas the indie video is about showing everything that’s happening. They actually have a kind of pleasing schtick. From the video notes: “This cover is a VideoSong, a new medium with 2 rules: 1. What you see is what you hear (no lip-syncing for instruments or voice). 2. If you hear it, at some point you see it (no hidden sounds).” To be clear I am not saying they are not twee, because they are.
Let’s be honest, Beyonce’s moves are way awesomer than that girl’s, but the difference between the videos isn’t just ‘neutral face expression.’ Beyonce’s video is all about production values and hiding things and big and exciting, whereas the indie video is about showing everything that’s happening. They actually have a kind of pleasing schtick. From the video notes: “This cover is a VideoSong, a new medium with 2 rules: 1. What you see is what you hear (no lip-syncing for instruments or voice). 2. If you hear it, at some point you see it (no hidden sounds).” To be clear I am not saying they are not twee, because they are.
Oh, certainly there are other differences. I was remarking, though, ultimately on ideas of tone because I was hoping to—and, I guess—failing to talk about the crop of flat-toned writers out there.
Beyonce’s is outsized and wild. The other is not. It’s flat. Her intention—showing what is going on to create the sounds—is in this case beside the point to me.
Sure, she’s trying to teach her own craft lesson. I don’t care about that lesson. It’s not interesting to me. Not when considering these two in juxtaposition to make another point.
I sort of like her mole.
Oh, certainly there are other differences. I was remarking, though, ultimately on ideas of tone because I was hoping to—and, I guess—failing to talk about the crop of flat-toned writers out there.
Beyonce’s is outsized and wild. The other is not. It’s flat. Her intention—showing what is going on to create the sounds—is in this case beside the point to me.
Sure, she’s trying to teach her own craft lesson. I don’t care about that lesson. It’s not interesting to me. Not when considering these two in juxtaposition to make another point.
I sort of like her mole.
I think the indie girl is hot.
I think the indie girl is hot.
I sort of like her mole.
I think maybe another haircut would be a little more fetching, though.
But less indie.
I sort of like her mole.
I think maybe another haircut would be a little more fetching, though.
But less indie.
I like that girl’s video a lot.
I like that girl’s video a lot.
sigh.
sigh.
That video is so oddly bad, I liked it. It was weird enough and like insulting enough (esp to women) that I found it pleasantly absurd.
That video is so oddly bad, I liked it. It was weird enough and like insulting enough (esp to women) that I found it pleasantly absurd.
Weird video. Is what I mean to say.
Weird video. Is what I mean to say.
and beyonce is made of plastic
and beyonce is made of plastic