June 28th, 2010 / 3:17 pm
Random

Impertinence or Inspiration?

From Susan Howe’s Souls of the Labadie Tract:

Longing and envy rest
after a little—garden under
trees but better still likely

to be still more anxious to
get to just daylight all I’ve
always pushed back

***

That’s the “Labadie Poplar”
Labadists—New Bohemia
little is otherwise known
Our secret and resolute woe
Carolled to our last adieu
Our message was electric

Will you forget when I forget
that we are come to that

In the copy of the book I got out of the library, the following changes and updates have been made to these two pages:

Longing and envy rest
after a little—garden under
trees but better still likely

to be still more anxious to
get to just daylight all I’ve
always pushed back

that also changes
very little
an ant tugging
a corn chip

***

That’s the “Labadie Poplar”
Labadists—New Bohemia
little is otherwise known
Our secret and resolute woe
Carolled to our last adieu
Our message was electric

Will you forget when I forget
that we are come to that
Little is otherwise known

Rewriting Susan Howe? So, how did the rewriter do? Ant tugging a corn chip? Inspired or impertinent? (Leaning towards impertinent.)

Would you do something like this? Make your changes in a library book? Make your changes a matter of public record? Have you down it?

And what about me? I’ve got the book right here. Should I erase the changes? Should I leave them so that the rest of the library patrons can judge the edits for themselves? Maybe someone else would find them inspired and inspiring.

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10 Comments

  1. Adam Robinson

      Those changes are very bad. It isn’t just the meter that’s been destroyed, but that last line — what’s the point? Ruling: impertinent.

  2. Phil

      Typical workshopping edit–they made it conform to banal line break standards, w/out, obviously, understanding the poem. This happens all the time in the classroom. Many students can’t be bothered to put in the creative energy it takes to read someone’s work so they just suggest new line breaks–new stanza shapes–new punctuation–busy work–especially if it’s free verse which it is, 90% of the time. In the PR interview James Tate said that he bans all line break talk in his classes, to force people to read.

  3. Bobby Alter

      reading this, I was struck by a melancholy vision of the loneliness of the person who made these changes

      changing/adding a few lines to a single copy of a given book is in no way altering the quality of the original text

      what about “call and response,” as in music?

      interior design

      somehow it seems clearer to me that this is not an edit, but an overlaying

  4. Adam Robinson

      Those changes are very bad. It isn’t just the meter that’s been destroyed, but that last line — what’s the point? Ruling: impertinent.

  5. Jimmy Chen

      try viewing that image upside-down, it’s awesome

  6. Phil

      Typical workshopping edit–they made it conform to banal line break standards, w/out, obviously, understanding the poem. This happens all the time in the classroom. Many students can’t be bothered to put in the creative energy it takes to read someone’s work so they just suggest new line breaks–new stanza shapes–new punctuation–busy work–especially if it’s free verse which it is, 90% of the time. In the PR interview James Tate said that he bans all line break talk in his classes, to force people to read.

  7. Bobby Alter

      reading this, I was struck by a melancholy vision of the loneliness of the person who made these changes

      changing/adding a few lines to a single copy of a given book is in no way altering the quality of the original text

      what about “call and response,” as in music?

      interior design

      somehow it seems clearer to me that this is not an edit, but an overlaying

  8. Jimmy Chen

      try viewing that image upside-down, it’s awesome

  9. Imola

      The picture of Narcissus brings new interpretation…

      Best!

  10. Imola

      The picture of Narcissus brings new interpretation…

      Best!