April 21st, 2010 / 6:57 pm
Behind the Scenes & Random

most writing prompts suck

So I will try a not-suck one (warning: it might suck). Begin your story/exercise this way:

Socks you wear daily (not yours), revolver, dog you love, dragged out back in the snow falling darkness, dragged behind the dumpster with gun placed to head…Go.

Now, go ahead, say that is lame. Hell, I agree. Way too many images. Crazy off-the-page-subtext. Even seems a bit forced, possibly melodramatic. Even leaning prescriptive.

That’s a prompt?

Maybe the genre of prompt is actually like swimming a true mile (anyone?), as in tougher-than-I-fucking-thought?

Well, fuck. And you. And You try. One sentence, please.

Can I get a non-cliche prompt?

I do not want 1. Which god are you? 2. You drank a milkshake and feel weird. 3. Knock, knock. What was that?

Anything else is cool.

Add your writing prompt (this might appear later in a textbook. And I’m the type of person to pay you .00002 % royalty as opposed to those bastards stealing your idea at 0001%, ha, ha [no, seriously, ha, ha]).

Uh. The point is write ONE sentence as a writing prompt. Let’s see it.

Tags:

92 Comments

  1. andrea seigel

      “Pretend there is a magazine called something like ‘Penthouse’ and you are writing a letter to a forum– of sorts– detailing the evening you came across a young lady whose automobile had failed in a bad part of town and who was willing to repay you, somehow, if you would siphon off a bit of your fuel into her tank, and you said: __________________________________________________________________.”

  2. andrea seigel

      “Pretend there is a magazine called something like ‘Penthouse’ and you are writing a letter to a forum– of sorts– detailing the evening you came across a young lady whose automobile had failed in a bad part of town and who was willing to repay you, somehow, if you would siphon off a bit of your fuel into her tank, and you said: __________________________________________________________________.”

  3. JScap

      An amazingly shameful moment, one you’ve never told, couched in fiction and set in the heart of a scene, with one major detail– character, atmosphere, time, occasion– radicially changed.

  4. JScap

      An amazingly shameful moment, one you’ve never told, couched in fiction and set in the heart of a scene, with one major detail– character, atmosphere, time, occasion– radicially changed.

  5. Rebekah Silverman

      Prompts are meh. I’m tired of people putting prompts on Twitter. I’m tired of people thinking the Wishlist is a list of prompts.

  6. Rebekah Silverman

      Prompts are meh. I’m tired of people putting prompts on Twitter. I’m tired of people thinking the Wishlist is a list of prompts.

  7. Sean

      Yes. I get this. Maybe prompts should just die. Maybe just evaporate. But it seems like they cling.

      I mean what exactly are they?

  8. Sean

      Yes. I get this. Maybe prompts should just die. Maybe just evaporate. But it seems like they cling.

      I mean what exactly are they?

  9. Slowstudies

      Write your own most outrageous example of “bad writing.”

  10. Slowstudies

      Write your own most outrageous example of “bad writing.”

  11. Ryan Call

      i havent written to prompts in a long time. i never liked writing to prompts. i tend to think they are not helpful (to me, i mean). instead, they make me more frustrated, i guess.

  12. Kyle Minor

      Write about the worst thing that ever happened to anyone in your family from the point of view of the person who inflicted it upon your family and make us by god love them.

  13. Ryan Call

      i havent written to prompts in a long time. i never liked writing to prompts. i tend to think they are not helpful (to me, i mean). instead, they make me more frustrated, i guess.

  14. Kyle Minor

      Write about the worst thing that ever happened to anyone in your family from the point of view of the person who inflicted it upon your family and make us by god love them.

  15. demi-puppet

      i find some basic, kind of arbitrary prompts good to get the juices flowing. stuff like “fill a page w/ sharp images about winter.” “write in the voice of that one janitor who handed out jolly ranchers in jr high.” etc.

  16. demi-puppet

      i find some basic, kind of arbitrary prompts good to get the juices flowing. stuff like “fill a page w/ sharp images about winter.” “write in the voice of that one janitor who handed out jolly ranchers in jr high.” etc.

  17. demi-puppet

      A book of fiction written wholly in writing prompts would be interesting.

  18. demi-puppet

      A book of fiction written wholly in writing prompts would be interesting.

  19. Shannon Peil

      Take one job you had in your past that is unusual (that the average person would find inside knowledge about interesting) and modify it to be the inner workings of a nonexistent business – write about it from the inside to explain how this person ended up there.

      Okay. Pretty sucky. I hate prompts.

  20. Shannon Peil

      Take one job you had in your past that is unusual (that the average person would find inside knowledge about interesting) and modify it to be the inner workings of a nonexistent business – write about it from the inside to explain how this person ended up there.

      Okay. Pretty sucky. I hate prompts.

  21. Matthew Simmons

      I feel attacked by this post and its comment thread.

      Also, this is my new prompt:

      httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-hqfWAJ2wJI&feature=player_embedded

  22. Matthew Simmons

      I feel attacked by this post and its comment thread.

      Also, this is my new prompt:

      httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-hqfWAJ2wJI&feature=player_embedded

  23. NK

      Write about something that has nothing to do with you.

  24. NK

      Write about something that has nothing to do with you.

  25. Tyler

      Write about your best experience with ice cream from the point of view of a dog.

  26. Tyler

      Write about your best experience with ice cream from the point of view of a dog.

  27. Tim Horvath

      Spend an afternoon in a slaughterhouse. Find three books in three languages that you do not speak and read a page of each out loud, one in a whisper, one in a normal voice, one thunderous. Watch something burn for ten minutes. Go to a reptile convention, and find the mother who is there to be with her daughter even though she hates reptiles. Look at your house. Look at your house. Look at your house. Get muddy. That is your prompt.

  28. Tim Horvath

      Spend an afternoon in a slaughterhouse. Find three books in three languages that you do not speak and read a page of each out loud, one in a whisper, one in a normal voice, one thunderous. Watch something burn for ten minutes. Go to a reptile convention, and find the mother who is there to be with her daughter even though she hates reptiles. Look at your house. Look at your house. Look at your house. Get muddy. That is your prompt.

  29. justin b.

      a dance club from the point of view of the music

  30. justin b.

      a dance club from the point of view of the music

  31. 10-Year Gain To Set The Brakes On Breasts Most cancers | Mesothelioma Cancer

      […] HTMLGIANT / most writing prompts suck Share and Enjoy: […]

  32. zusya

      Socks you wear daily (not yours), revolver, dog you love, dragged out back in the snow falling darkness, dragged behind the dumpster with gun placed to head…Go.

      i am sick, i am sick of being the only one who knows what i put myself and everyone and everything i know through and i know what my slow and useless whirling dervish of a life has brought me and the rest of the world, and i look, and i look out into that black, empty rest of OK, and i know that now, now, is the time to finally show you what i’ve really been thinkin’, all this time, and i truly know that it’s time to make sure that i’z at least get remembered what what they find in the aftermath, i know that it’s time that i stop tellin’ myself that there’s anything wrong me and i know how important it is they at least find that it was my love, my one real love i have to give, it’s important they know that my only love has even been brutal fucking violence.

  33. gavin pate

      Write three paragraphs about eating fish: [then, take thirteenth sentence, cut and paste to new page, start story here].

  34. gavin pate

      Write three paragraphs about eating fish: [then, take thirteenth sentence, cut and paste to new page, start story here].

  35. Jason Floyd Williams
  36. Jason Floyd Williams
  37. reynard

      woops, sorry jason floyd williams, i will stop impersonating you now, go in peace to love and serve great american literature and mather schneider

  38. reynard

      woops, sorry jason floyd williams, i will stop impersonating you now, go in peace to love and serve great american literature and mather schneider

  39. zusya

      plus a prompt:

      “Write as yourself on your death bed remembering your first memory.”

  40. d

      You are the Statue of Liberty, having sex with the Eiffel Tower.

  41. d

      You are the Statue of Liberty, having sex with the Eiffel Tower.

  42. christian

      for intro workshops:

      take a sheet of paper, write down you favorite joke, pass it to the person to your left, and turn the joke you receive into a tragedy in 250 words or fewer.

  43. christian

      for intro workshops:

      take a sheet of paper, write down you favorite joke, pass it to the person to your left, and turn the joke you receive into a tragedy in 250 words or fewer.

  44. phm

      Just when you think you’re not getting drunk from your 40 ounce malt liquor,

  45. phm

      Just when you think you’re not getting drunk from your 40 ounce malt liquor,

  46. mimi

      “Jeremy steal white plastic tubing?”
      “Jeremy steal a bag of balloons from Safeway?”

      “Say ‘what’ again. I dare you.”
      – Jules Winfield

      Play Twenty Questions.

      “If you bitch-slapped it, would it cry?”

      It’s 2:31 AM.

      Write something good.

  47. mimi

      “Jeremy steal white plastic tubing?”
      “Jeremy steal a bag of balloons from Safeway?”

      “Say ‘what’ again. I dare you.”
      – Jules Winfield

      Play Twenty Questions.

      “If you bitch-slapped it, would it cry?”

      It’s 2:31 AM.

      Write something good.

  48. Adam R

      Is that Amy McDaniel? Did she get married?

  49. Adam R

      Is that Amy McDaniel? Did she get married?

  50. Richard

      Tough, so many prompts are tough. I’ll try one.

      WRITING PROMPT: Pick a genre you have never written in, write in the opposite sex of whatever sex you are, and the story must contain some reference to loss, the scent of bacon cooking, a 66 Mustang (Candy Apple Red), something breaking (glass or otherwise), the sensation of silk on your fingertips or body, and the taste of copper in your mouth. GO.

      Ah, that probably sucks too.

      WRITING PROMPT: You must kill somebody that you love. GO.
      WRITING PROMPT: You wake up in a puddle of your own vomit and urine. GO.
      WRITING PROMPT: You are having sex. Not with your spouse. GO.
      WRITING PROMPT: The reality you know is false. GO.

      Bleh.

      I give up. I suck.

  51. Richard

      Tough, so many prompts are tough. I’ll try one.

      WRITING PROMPT: Pick a genre you have never written in, write in the opposite sex of whatever sex you are, and the story must contain some reference to loss, the scent of bacon cooking, a 66 Mustang (Candy Apple Red), something breaking (glass or otherwise), the sensation of silk on your fingertips or body, and the taste of copper in your mouth. GO.

      Ah, that probably sucks too.

      WRITING PROMPT: You must kill somebody that you love. GO.
      WRITING PROMPT: You wake up in a puddle of your own vomit and urine. GO.
      WRITING PROMPT: You are having sex. Not with your spouse. GO.
      WRITING PROMPT: The reality you know is false. GO.

      Bleh.

      I give up. I suck.

  52. ZZZZZIPP

      YOUR DAD JUST ATE A LOAF OF BREAD MADE WITH RANCID OIL. IT WAS YOUR FAULT. APOLOGIZE TO HIM. WHAT DOES IT FEEL LIKE WHEN YOU TURN INTO A PHOTON TO ESCAPE. CAN YOU HEAR YOUR MOM CRYING.

  53. ZZZZZIPP

      YOUR DAD JUST ATE A LOAF OF BREAD MADE WITH RANCID OIL. IT WAS YOUR FAULT. APOLOGIZE TO HIM. WHAT DOES IT FEEL LIKE WHEN YOU TURN INTO A PHOTON TO ESCAPE. CAN YOU HEAR YOUR MOM CRYING.

  54. ZZZZZIPP

      “MOM I TOLD YOU THIS ISN’T ABOUT YOU!!!!”

  55. ZZZZZIPP

      “MOM I TOLD YOU THIS ISN’T ABOUT YOU!!!!”

  56. mimi

      “I give up. I suck.” isn’t too bad.

  57. mimi

      “I give up. I suck.” isn’t too bad.

  58. Adam R

      That is unbelievable.

  59. Adam R

      That is unbelievable.

  60. P.J. Blount

      In hindsight, it was simple math to determine that the fifty dollars you were holding in you hand was not worth the the turd you had to put in your pants to get it.

  61. P.J. Blount

      In hindsight, it was simple math to determine that the fifty dollars you were holding in you hand was not worth the the turd you had to put in your pants to get it.

  62. davidpeak

      matthew simmons, i firmly credit your “rot” prompt for getting me published by monkeybicycle. i’m serious. it saved my story!

  63. davidpeak

      matthew simmons, i firmly credit your “rot” prompt for getting me published by monkeybicycle. i’m serious. it saved my story!

  64. Jack Boettcher
  65. Jack Boettcher
  66. ce.

      Liiike a glove!

  67. ce.

      Liiike a glove!

  68. ce.

      Go to the laundry mat, sit and watch someone else’s laundry, and write a story/poem/something about this person using only what you know of their laundry.

  69. ce.

      Go to the laundry mat, sit and watch someone else’s laundry, and write a story/poem/something about this person using only what you know of their laundry.

  70. mimi

      She is haulin’ a sweet ride
      Miss Tokyo Drift

  71. mimi

      She is haulin’ a sweet ride
      Miss Tokyo Drift

  72. Tadd

      Are we making a distinction between prompts and constraints? I like constraints, but I’m not sure how they’re different, ultimately, from prompts. Meh.

  73. Tadd

      Are we making a distinction between prompts and constraints? I like constraints, but I’m not sure how they’re different, ultimately, from prompts. Meh.

  74. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      Mmm… constraints.

  75. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      Mmm… constraints.

  76. Roxane Gay

      No no, you’re thinking of restraints.

  77. Roxane Gay

      No no, you’re thinking of restraints.

  78. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      Oh, right.

  79. Tim Jones-Yelvington

      Oh, right.

  80. Matthew Simmons

      That kid’s a hero.

  81. Matthew Simmons

      That kid’s a hero.

  82. Sean

      constraints is when people tell you to not end a story by having the narrator kill herself.

  83. Sean

      constraints is when people tell you to not end a story by having the narrator kill herself.

  84. darby

      prompts that work for me are ones that are vague or abstract. like, think of the word ‘soft,’ then write something.

  85. darby

      prompts that work for me are ones that are vague or abstract. like, think of the word ‘soft,’ then write something.

  86. davidpeak

      yes. i once had a writing class where we were given one-word prompts each week. then we wrote for five minutes or so. words like, “heel,” or “hairnet.” it was surprisingly effective. better than any sort of hypothetical situation or contrivance.

  87. davidpeak

      yes. i once had a writing class where we were given one-word prompts each week. then we wrote for five minutes or so. words like, “heel,” or “hairnet.” it was surprisingly effective. better than any sort of hypothetical situation or contrivance.

  88. Ben

      He tells the little girl that he is her husband from the future, and she believes him.

  89. Ben

      He tells the little girl that he is her husband from the future, and she believes him.

  90. Tim Horvath

      Great example of constraints in action is the film “The Five Obstructions,” (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Five_Obstructions) in which Lars Von Trier challenges Jorgen Leth to remake his short and sweet film, “The Perfect Human” five times, but with obstacles placed in the way–i.e. it is remade in Cuba, severe restrictions are made on the length of takes, and so on. I envision something like this in terms of revising a literary work, an alternative to Oulipean formal constraints, since Lars’s “constraints” pointedly straddle form and content, & with a little mischievous goading thrown in for good measure, bound to force a piece down some unexpected paths.

  91. Tim Horvath

      Great example of constraints in action is the film “The Five Obstructions,” (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Five_Obstructions) in which Lars Von Trier challenges Jorgen Leth to remake his short and sweet film, “The Perfect Human” five times, but with obstacles placed in the way–i.e. it is remade in Cuba, severe restrictions are made on the length of takes, and so on. I envision something like this in terms of revising a literary work, an alternative to Oulipean formal constraints, since Lars’s “constraints” pointedly straddle form and content, & with a little mischievous goading thrown in for good measure, bound to force a piece down some unexpected paths.

  92. Literature News | Dark Sky Magazine

      […] Recently Sean Lovelace did a post over at HTMLGIANT where he asked readers to supply a decent writing prompt. […]