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N, the literary coefficient
Okay, this is complicated: ADD is Attention Deficit Disorder, and the acronym spells ‘add,’ and so, people with ADD are to do two things: 1) read the name of the following journals all the way through by 2) adding the letters following the addition sign. You may ask, ‘what is the point of this shit?’ to which I reply, ‘fuck off, I’m a contributing writer.’
I don’t no much about this journal, though they seem somewhat negative. I can imagine their rejection letter: No
From our very own M. Young and R. Call, this is a beautifully designed journal featuring the hard hitters of online lit today (R. Lopez, T. Lin, B. Butler, K. Spitzer, N. Cicero, C. Smith, et al). The Germanic umlaut is Mike’s way of saying ‘I’m am the fuhrer.’ The black and white logo reminds me of a cow. Noo Moo.
At 12PM sharp everyday, Diane Williams orders a latte and biscotti and sits down at a café and opens submissions. She has an engraved letter opener which reads “e-mail is for a-hole.” Once, she came across my submission and used it for a napkin. ‘Kiss me,’ my story said, and was ignored.
There’s something about being really smart and living in NYC that makes people who are either not as smart or not living in NYC feel like shit. Every time I see the photo of the editors in their apartment/office, burdened by the implications of their formidable ideas, I feel obsolete, pathetic, and stupid (I will admit, alot of that is my father’s fault). If you look closely at the clock, you’ll notice it’s 12:30PM, half an hour behind Ms. Williams. She downed the biscotti and is off to zen camp. ‘Kiss me’, I said to those guys, and they said, ‘the comma goes inside the quotation mark.’ Choads!
Tags: german and choad grammar, n+1, NOÖ Journal, Noon quarterly
jimmy,
you are funny.
jimmy,
you are funny.
No is a good poetry journal half-edited by Ben Lerner, who is one of today’s most amazing poets. His book Angle of Yaw is required reading as of the beginning of this sentence.
No is a good poetry journal half-edited by Ben Lerner, who is one of today’s most amazing poets. His book Angle of Yaw is required reading as of the beginning of this sentence.
how is it that even though they have a big fan running, the newspapers all over the coffee table are not blowing around?
was keith really holding that book when a photographer said “look up here, guys…wait…no, two of you look up, one of you keep reading, and ben, why don’t you go ahead and look out the window”? was he reading a passage out loud to the fellas? was the passage pertinent or just sort of funny?
how is it that even though they have a big fan running, the newspapers all over the coffee table are not blowing around?
was keith really holding that book when a photographer said “look up here, guys…wait…no, two of you look up, one of you keep reading, and ben, why don’t you go ahead and look out the window”? was he reading a passage out loud to the fellas? was the passage pertinent or just sort of funny?
he’s holding n+1. i looked closely. had he just spotted a typo?
is the one on the left on myspace?
he’s holding n+1. i looked closely. had he just spotted a typo?
is the one on the left on myspace?
I’ve purchased N plus One a few times. One essay once discussed why they didn’t publish more fiction, and they said that they were not happy with their submissions that they wanted..”bla bla bla fiction”and then– this I remember “We want edible fiction”. I laughed out loud and thought to myself, thank God I’m not 24 and a Harvard grad. That said, their love of -non-traditional or pomo or whatever, fiction, so I think a lot of the peeps here would do good to check them out. I like to eat food and READ fiction. At the same time.
Noon, too, is a Lish dominated journal, which means a lot of you guys would love it. They published this rather straighforward crazy, stuff by a guy named …Clancy something or other? Diamond dealer who has problems with whores and stuff? Anyone remember that? I felt violated after reading it, sort of in a good way.
Anyway, I’m sure you all know all that already. Just having a caffeine chatty moment before I spend the rest of my night scooping cat litter.
formidable ideas
I’ve purchased N plus One a few times. One essay once discussed why they didn’t publish more fiction, and they said that they were not happy with their submissions that they wanted..”bla bla bla fiction”and then– this I remember “We want edible fiction”. I laughed out loud and thought to myself, thank God I’m not 24 and a Harvard grad. That said, their love of -non-traditional or pomo or whatever, fiction, so I think a lot of the peeps here would do good to check them out. I like to eat food and READ fiction. At the same time.
Noon, too, is a Lish dominated journal, which means a lot of you guys would love it. They published this rather straighforward crazy, stuff by a guy named …Clancy something or other? Diamond dealer who has problems with whores and stuff? Anyone remember that? I felt violated after reading it, sort of in a good way.
Anyway, I’m sure you all know all that already. Just having a caffeine chatty moment before I spend the rest of my night scooping cat litter.
formidable ideas
is it clancy martin? i have a couple of issues of NOON and i think he’s in one. haven’t read him though. his cv is online. i googled clancy and noon and found it. he seems to be a philosopher.
i like NOON. diane’s rejections are not at all unpleasant, and she seemed to get back to me within a month.
is it clancy martin? i have a couple of issues of NOON and i think he’s in one. haven’t read him though. his cv is online. i googled clancy and noon and found it. he seems to be a philosopher.
i like NOON. diane’s rejections are not at all unpleasant, and she seemed to get back to me within a month.
Yes, Clancy Martin. I read two excerpts ( I think that is what they are) of his book, very auto-biographical, very nasty stuff, or to mind, nast stuff. I loved the clarity of it. Painful shit. I think one was in Noon, and I cannot remember where the other was. Somewhere fancy.
I’ve only gotten a form letter from Noon. Only sent something to them once. But I have respect for the journal.
Yes, Clancy Martin. I read two excerpts ( I think that is what they are) of his book, very auto-biographical, very nasty stuff, or to mind, nast stuff. I loved the clarity of it. Painful shit. I think one was in Noon, and I cannot remember where the other was. Somewhere fancy.
I’ve only gotten a form letter from Noon. Only sent something to them once. But I have respect for the journal.
sorry bout the typos- i meant to say to my mind i find him nasty- something like that-
sorry bout the typos- i meant to say to my mind i find him nasty- something like that-
Wow. I love when people rip on N plus One. Thank you. What a joke they are. Have you seen how ugly their books actually look? It’s like they try to make the stupidest covers ever. and the layout is a tragedy. I loathe that Keith Gessen guy too. Look how seriously he takes himself. Hmmm…I wonder if Kunkel helped him get that shiteous book he wrote published. Kunkel is a pretty cool guy, though, and I think he might be separating himself from the magazine. All of the articles are overthought and way too wordy for what they are saying. Most of the fiction sucks too. Thank you for bashing them! Fuck N plus One. Long Live….ummm….other New York lit journals. And long live No Colony! And long live Blake Butler. And bears!
Wow. I love when people rip on N plus One. Thank you. What a joke they are. Have you seen how ugly their books actually look? It’s like they try to make the stupidest covers ever. and the layout is a tragedy. I loathe that Keith Gessen guy too. Look how seriously he takes himself. Hmmm…I wonder if Kunkel helped him get that shiteous book he wrote published. Kunkel is a pretty cool guy, though, and I think he might be separating himself from the magazine. All of the articles are overthought and way too wordy for what they are saying. Most of the fiction sucks too. Thank you for bashing them! Fuck N plus One. Long Live….ummm….other New York lit journals. And long live No Colony! And long live Blake Butler. And bears!