Book: The Sequel contest

cyborg

Finally, a story contest that plays to my strengths as a writer: short attention span and love of despoiling classic works. Enter submissions by May 30 and write a one-line sequel to your favorite books. I went with Sentimental Education, since I read it recently and it’s good. I entitled the sequel “The Death of Sentiment.”

In the distant future, Frederic, realizing that he was somehow no longer a French dandy, but instead a heavily-armed cyborg knee-deep in gristle, shrapnel and unidentified limbs, accepted that the time for idleness and romance had passed—now it was time for payback.

Contests / Comments Off on Book: The Sequel contest
May 26th, 2009 / 12:09 pm

YOU’RE NOT ALONE– IF YOU WIN THIS CONTEST

Look alive, kids. This sweet mother is coming to NYC on May 30th, and we’ve got a pair of tickets to give away. First read the flier and get yourself all worked up, then I’ll tell you how you can win.

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So okay, you might have noticed that one of the event sponsors is SMITH magazine, the force behind last/this year’s bizarrely wonderful Six-Word Memoir phenomenon. And the last time I blogged about the Rumpus it was about their “Last Book I Loved” column (which, btw, now has its own index page, so you can see all the entries in the series). So let’s make this easy as sin- if you want the pair of tickets to this event, you need to write a six-word “Last Book I Loved” entry and leave it in the comment thread on this post. Book title and author’s name don’t count against your word limit. Also include a way for me to get in touch with you, or else don’t forget to check back here tomorrow to see who won. The contest will be open all day today, with entries closing at midnight EST. Good luck.

Contests / 38 Comments
May 26th, 2009 / 12:03 pm

Dead Eye Dick Contest

*contest ends May 26 8PM (PST)

vonnegut2yv1

CONTEST:

In the comment section, write your own version/introduction to Vonnegut’s famous drawing — though you must re-appropriate the drawing so that it’s not an asshole — like, it could be a diagram on how to cut a pizza, or a drawing of the big bang, etc. It should be roughly the same word count as the original portion above, and you do not need to mimic Vonnegut’s style.

I will choose the winner based on creativity of re-appropriation and actual writing. Your piece must end with a colon (get it? asshole/colon, hey Onion, call me…). Please no ‘blast entries,’ just one entry per person.

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Contests / 82 Comments
May 25th, 2009 / 4:27 pm

Novel Naming Contest No. 2

*Update* James Yeh won the contest on the first comment. 

mountaint1

This picture describes 3 novels written by black authors. Keep in mind I’m using ‘black’ and not ‘African-American’ or ‘African’ to broaden the scope. The first person to correctly name all 3 novels in one comment wins. As mentioned before, the winning answers may simply be a collation of previous semi-correct answers, so judgment and imagination are both important.

pr and I are collaborating on this contest No. 2 (see contest No. 1 if you missed it). Basically, I’m moderating/officiating, and pr is  graciously procuring the prize, and handling the logistics of its delivery.

To honor the theme, the prize are books written by black people. (I’d like to point out that I don’t know who any of these people are, because I’m somewhat ignorant, thus cannot comment on them.)

The Intuitionist by Colson Whitehead
Hunting
 In Harlem by Mat Johnson
Dead Sexy by R.K. Byers
Salt by Earl Lovelace
The Bride Price by Buchi Emecheta
homegirls and handgrenades by Sonia Sanchez
Last Chance for the Tarzan Holler by Thylias Moss

Thank you pr for such a generous donation (including postage!) to this contest.

Contests / 7 Comments
May 25th, 2009 / 3:36 pm

Two Dollar Radio rereleases Rudy Wurlitzer

books-nog-cover

Two Dollar Radio has just now rereleased Rudolph Wurlitzer’s classic ‘Nog,’ a sincerely gritty and visceral book with sentences that crush. Having read this book in earlier editions, I can tell you this book feels just as vital and fresh now as it likely did among the literary terrain of its original release in the 60’s, perhaps even more so.

But let’s don’t have me give you the word on it. Let’s have Thomas Pynchon:

“Wow, this is some book, I mean, it’s more than a beautiful and heavy trip, it’s also very important in an evolutionary way, showing us directions we could be moving in — hopefully another sign that the Novel of Bullshit is dead and some kind of re-enlightenment is beginning to arrive, to take hold. Rudolph Wurlitzer is really, really good, and I hope he manages to come down again soon, long enough anyhow to guide us on another one like Nog.”

Death to the Novel of Bullshit, what else can you ask for?

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Presses / 19 Comments
May 25th, 2009 / 12:56 pm

drunk post: does anyone want Logan’s Run on DVD?

chopstowerSo it’s been an uneventful Memorial Weekend Sunday of drinking and doing laundry here in Houston. I finally got around to watching Logan’s Run, a sci-fi film based on the novel of the same name by William F. Nolan and George Clayton Johnson. I’ve owned this movie for a few years, but never got around to watching it.

Until now.

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Random / 43 Comments
May 24th, 2009 / 10:53 pm

Got Balzac Close to My Face, Ho

After an initial rejection by Apple due to its inclusion of ‘Ways Tom Jones Would Dance With Your Mother,’ the ebook reader Eucalyptus is available to all people/assholes with an iPhone or iPod touch.

The interface is nice, the size of the text is scalable, and it gives you easy access to the 20,000+ book large Project Gutenberg. It’s not like it’ll make me any less thirsty for Tao Lin on a Kindle, but it’s fun to browse through so many nice books written by so many nice dead people.

If you have iTunes, you can check it out here.

Technology / 8 Comments
May 24th, 2009 / 5:00 pm

Members Only (that means you)

anniehoofd1

My name is Woody Allen. This is the opening scene from Annie Hall where I tell some of my morbid stand-up jokes. If you’re curious about what I said, many years later there will be this thing called youtube so you can check it out here. As for the tan brown color behind me, you’ll notice both my hair and jacket are brown, and I’m just that subtle. Anyways, check out my jokes, I’m really funny. I’m really looking forward to the future.

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Massive People / 9 Comments
May 24th, 2009 / 2:16 am

Literary Lessons from Metal Magazines: Goblin C*ck

This post is Not Safe For Work! Nor is it safe if you are a huge fan of Redbook Magazine. So, yeah. No need to read:

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Excerpts / 31 Comments
May 23rd, 2009 / 7:49 pm

hi speed wireless seeks loving relationship

1149357447396 READ MORE >

Technology / 29 Comments
May 23rd, 2009 / 5:00 pm