CONTEST! My favorite line in Lost is when Sawyer walks up to Jack and Juliet mid-intense-conversation and says to them, “What yall doing, arguing about who’s your favorite Other?” In the spirit of that and mean, who is your favorite HTMLGiant troll, past or present? deadgod? MFBomb? mimi? Christopher Higgs? Mather Schneider? phmadore? What would your grandfather say if he met the troll? Winner gets to direct a bromantic comedy with the troll and any 3 of our contributors or frequent non-troll commenters.

This is pretty wicked: Why Doc Brown is the real villain of Back to the Future [via Matt Bell]

Fuck Tuesday and its fucking MEAN WEEK doldrums. Here: say something mean to me. UPDATE: Or about me. UPDATE 2: added the kitty fist bump since everyone’s going after my cat and MY CAT IS A WINNER!

Learning to recognize the human is the job of Dr. Phil. The job of literature is not a job, and has nothing to do with recognition.

To the clever person introducing the poet: Shut the fuck up. To the poet: Read the poems.

MFA, SchMemFAy. The real scam is the fucking Creative Writing Ph.D. The MFA is a revenue stream. The Ph.D. is the teaching equivalent of indentured servitude.

HTMLGIANT suggests you become a fan of not creating a fan page for yourself on Facebook and inviting people to come become a fan of you via an autoemail that doesn’t even have enough self respect to pretend like someone else did it for you. Anyway, people often mostly only like the things they find on their own time. The best ads are smart enough to not be ads.

There’s a new addition to my recent roundup of discussions about MFAs. Anis Shivani hates MFA programs. Or something. Sadly, the article reads more like the author is trying too hard to be… something. I found it difficult to take the writing seriously because it was so over the top. I love this response from Jason at The Barking. It’s something too. Who pissed in the Wheaties of everyone who loves to rail against MFA programs?

What are the books you need to read between ages 17-22; if not then, never read them at all.

What is the vacuum cleaner in Matt Bell’s “Hold on to Your Vacuum”?