*contest ends May 26 8PM (PST)
In the comment section, write your own version/introduction to Vonnegut’s famous drawing — though you must re-appropriate the drawing so that it’s not an asshole — like, it could be a diagram on how to cut a pizza, or a drawing of the big bang, etc. It should be roughly the same word count as the original portion above, and you do not need to mimic Vonnegut’s style.
I will choose the winner based on creativity of re-appropriation and actual writing. Your piece must end with a colon (get it? asshole/colon, hey Onion, call me…). Please no ‘blast entries,’ just one entry per person.