Introducing HTMLGiant’s Official Mascot: Annette!
I received the following email last fall in my campus inbox, and ever since I’ve wanted to launch a guerilla mascot campaign of my own.
Dear Students and Campus Colleagues,
I wanted to send everyone a quick email to respond to questions regarding the appearance of a man with a white Scottish terrier on campus recently and their presence on social media as well.
Xxxx Xxxxxxxx is the president of the Scottish Terrier Club of Greater Xxxxxxx and he reached out to several offices over the summer to express interest in collaborative measures between the club and our college due to our shared interest in the “Scottie” dog. A meeting was scheduled for September 8 to discuss opportunities for the Club’s participation in several upcoming college events where the presence of a group of Scottie dogs would be welcomed.
Before this meeting could occur and any campus officials be consulted, Mr. Xxxxxxxx went forward with plans that the college had not reviewed or approved. Although we appreciate the club’s interest and their president’s obvious enthusiasm, the decision to have a real “mascot” belongs to Xxxxx Xxxxx not an outside group.
His dog named “Hayley” has a Facebook page with misinformation about her status as “mascot” and her relationship with the college. We have requested that he make corrections to the site.
Please be assured that we are working to resolve these issues in a manner that is in the best interest of our students and the college.
If any students or other community members have questions or want to share their feedback, please contact me in the Alumnae Office at (XXX) XXX-XXXX or xxxxxxxx@xxxxxxxxxx.edu.
Thank you.
Xxx
Xxx Xxxxxxx ‘XX
Director of Alumnae Relations
So, here is Annette, bichon frise, age 5. I searched coast to coast for a dog whose physiognomy reflected Blake, Ryan, and Gene’s combined physiologies. It was a tiring process, with a lot of heartbreak along the way, but finally I settled on Annette. She is also my own dog. Bichon frise means “frizzy pampered,” and the breed once traveled with Mediterranean sailors, who employed them as “friendly ambassadors” when they hit land. They later became favorites in the court of Henry III.
I recognize that declaring Annette to be the HTMLGiant mascot is not as bold as “Hayley’s” claim of being the mascot of a college with which she is in no way affiliated. But I still anticipate backlash, and if we get through that, I’m prepared to make her the mascot of the internet.
A little more on Annette: today, she helped me amend soil. “Soil amendment” is apparently not a euphemism for genocide; it is something that must be done if you want the right kind of flowers to populate your front yard.
Please welcome Annette!
Taking No For An Answer: Some New Thoughts on Self-Publishing
Lately, a number of writers have chosen to self-publish their work. Self-publishing isn’t new but with all the e-publishing options becoming available, there’s far more democracy to publishing and self-publishing than ever before. It doesn’t take much to get a book listed on Amazon or Barnes & Noble or the Apple Bookstore and with a few clicks of the mouse, you are your own publisher. Some of these self publishing writers say that they’re circumventing mainstream publishing as if they are self-publishing by choice, not because they couldn’t get their work published any other way. Sometimes that is actually the case. Sometimes it is not. I have no problem with self-publishing. It is not an option I would choose for myself, mostly because I don’t have the time to do the work required of someone who self publishes. However, I don’t begrudge writers who do avail themselves of the self-publishing route and it can be a really interesting way of challenging the publishing establishment and getting your work out there without having to deal with some of the more problematic aspects of mainstream publishing. At the same time, just because you can do something does not mean you should.
I read this excerpted interview between Joe Konrath and Barry Eisler (full interview here), the latter who turned down a $500K deal with St. Martin’s to self-publish his book and I had a few thoughts: 1) Wait, what?; 2) He must be able to afford turning down half a million dollars; 3) I am not familiar with Barry Eisler; 4) I admire that kind of confidence; 5) He must have the reputation (the talent being implied by the size of the deal) to make more money publishing his book himself; and 6) Neat, ballsy. The interview itself was really interesting but man, I really think there are some writers who underestimate the power of a traditional publisher. I wonder about the direness of publishing implied by some of the comments. I wonder, wonder, wonder.
I tried to teach a math class
I decided it would be better to TA a math class than to teach a creative writing class, so I called the math department at Brown and told the person who answered about my predicament–I’m in the writing program, I need funding so I have to teach, but I don’t want to teach in my department, I’d rather assist with a math class, would this be possible?
The person who answered transferred me to a different person who arranged for me to meet with himself and some graduate students. They would ask me some questions and, based on how I answered, allow me to teach in their department.
Excess of bad poetry: an interview with Luna Miguel
Luna and I have been preparing this interview for five months–or, I should say, I’ve been lazy and bad enough to (with the swerving and errant dedication that is now emerging as my style) let this one sit, short as it is, raveled and incomplete since October, asking a question every few weeks, no doubt irritating Luna in bookish, unpromising bursts. Which is all so stupid, so feckless of me because of how much of a force–a clearly, as you’ll find out, erudite and redoubtable force–Luna is in contemporary literature. Eg, here she is in Elmundo yesterday. As one might expect, Luna writes with the irreverent edge of a Rimbaud, but goes beyond mere edge, beyond what one might call the chintz of aspiration, to the “elsewhere,” not of youth, but of style, which is the earmark of youth; she might be called one of those writers who is not ahead of her time, who in fact has no toehold in anyone else’s time, but rather is planted squarely in her own time, but precisely because she has founded it–not alone, but en bloc with her comrades, who are amply referred to below (in fact, what we have there is a catalogue for the future). Hers is the time of a new world poetry. Welcome her.
On Blanchot’s AMINADAB
My only former point of reference for Blanchot’s fiction has been The Last Man, which, while stunning, was incredibly dense, and at times a real chore to get through (which is ultimately a positive quality for a book to have, far more affective in this case). Aminadab, however, has more of a narrative to its core which allows a reader to actually get through it rather quickly, and the narrative progression provides something to hold on to (I mention these things not to presuppose that Aminadab is better than The Last Man, rather to just differentiate). This is an entirely different experience than The Last Man.
There is still, I think, just as much thought present here. Though Aminadab is earlier in Blanchot’s career, before things had become as articulated perhaps, but certainly after he had already set out his task in approaching literature.
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March 22nd, 2011 / 12:29 pm
March 22nd, 2011 / 12:29 pm
What is Experimental Literature? {Five Questions: Tantra Bensko}
Tantra Bensko, MFA, teaches Experimental Fiction Writing online. Naissance Press published her chapbooks Watching the Windows Sleep, and the tiny Swinging on the Edge of Day. Her book Lucid Membrane has been accepted by NP. She has over 150 creative writing pieces in magazines. She edits her own magazine, Exclusive, and runs the resource website, Experimental Writing. She is the inventor of Lucid Fiction. She lives in Berkeley.
Anton LaVey on Writing
“There is a beast in man that needs to be exercised, not exorcised.”
“It has been said, ‘the truth will make men free.’ The truth alone has never made anyone free. It is only doubt which will bring mental emancipation.”
“Hair on a man’s chest is thought to denote strength. The gorilla is the most powerful of bipeds and has hair on every place on his body except for his chest.”
“When one sleeps on the floor one need not worry about falling out of bed.”
“I like raunchiness, not like in a biker-chick sort of a way, but like the girl can’t help it. Little bruises, a few hairs out of place, a little stain here and there.”
“Hopefully by bringing back burlesque, you’ll bring back the kind of body that’s round on top and round on bottom. I love cellulite and stretch marks!”
“You say it’s good to get a change of scenery. What scenery? New buildings? New cars? New freeways? New shopping malls? Go to the woods or a park? I saw a tree once. The new ones look the same, which is fine.”
“If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy.”
“I find greater companionship in inert figures, animals & speechless artifacts, for I can enjoy their presence & there is no psychic drain.”
“You cannot love everyone; it is ridiculous to think you can. If you love everyone and everything you lose your natural powers of selection and wind up being a pretty poor judge of character and quality. If anything is used too freely it loses its true meaning.”
“Do what you want as long as it’s paying off for you. But once it’s become a liability, then something is wrong and you better find out what it is.”
“Don’t let that little pyramid with the bright eye fool you. That’s to draw your attention away from the real thing: the big trapezoid beneath it.”
“To be loved, feelings must be rationed. To love, the doors of hysteria, fantasy, and madness may be flung open.”