May 2009

Dead Eye Dick Contest

*contest ends May 26 8PM (PST)

vonnegut2yv1

CONTEST:

In the comment section, write your own version/introduction to Vonnegut’s famous drawing — though you must re-appropriate the drawing so that it’s not an asshole — like, it could be a diagram on how to cut a pizza, or a drawing of the big bang, etc. It should be roughly the same word count as the original portion above, and you do not need to mimic Vonnegut’s style.

I will choose the winner based on creativity of re-appropriation and actual writing. Your piece must end with a colon (get it? asshole/colon, hey Onion, call me…). Please no ‘blast entries,’ just one entry per person.

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Contests / 82 Comments
May 25th, 2009 / 4:27 pm

Novel Naming Contest No. 2

*Update* James Yeh won the contest on the first comment. 

mountaint1

This picture describes 3 novels written by black authors. Keep in mind I’m using ‘black’ and not ‘African-American’ or ‘African’ to broaden the scope. The first person to correctly name all 3 novels in one comment wins. As mentioned before, the winning answers may simply be a collation of previous semi-correct answers, so judgment and imagination are both important.

pr and I are collaborating on this contest No. 2 (see contest No. 1 if you missed it). Basically, I’m moderating/officiating, and pr is  graciously procuring the prize, and handling the logistics of its delivery.

To honor the theme, the prize are books written by black people. (I’d like to point out that I don’t know who any of these people are, because I’m somewhat ignorant, thus cannot comment on them.)

The Intuitionist by Colson Whitehead
Hunting
 In Harlem by Mat Johnson
Dead Sexy by R.K. Byers
Salt by Earl Lovelace
The Bride Price by Buchi Emecheta
homegirls and handgrenades by Sonia Sanchez
Last Chance for the Tarzan Holler by Thylias Moss

Thank you pr for such a generous donation (including postage!) to this contest.

Contests / 7 Comments
May 25th, 2009 / 3:36 pm

Two Dollar Radio rereleases Rudy Wurlitzer

books-nog-cover

Two Dollar Radio has just now rereleased Rudolph Wurlitzer’s classic ‘Nog,’ a sincerely gritty and visceral book with sentences that crush. Having read this book in earlier editions, I can tell you this book feels just as vital and fresh now as it likely did among the literary terrain of its original release in the 60’s, perhaps even more so.

But let’s don’t have me give you the word on it. Let’s have Thomas Pynchon:

“Wow, this is some book, I mean, it’s more than a beautiful and heavy trip, it’s also very important in an evolutionary way, showing us directions we could be moving in — hopefully another sign that the Novel of Bullshit is dead and some kind of re-enlightenment is beginning to arrive, to take hold. Rudolph Wurlitzer is really, really good, and I hope he manages to come down again soon, long enough anyhow to guide us on another one like Nog.”

Death to the Novel of Bullshit, what else can you ask for?

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Presses / 19 Comments
May 25th, 2009 / 12:56 pm

drunk post: does anyone want Logan’s Run on DVD?

chopstowerSo it’s been an uneventful Memorial Weekend Sunday of drinking and doing laundry here in Houston. I finally got around to watching Logan’s Run, a sci-fi film based on the novel of the same name by William F. Nolan and George Clayton Johnson. I’ve owned this movie for a few years, but never got around to watching it.

Until now.

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Random / 43 Comments
May 24th, 2009 / 10:53 pm

Got Balzac Close to My Face, Ho

After an initial rejection by Apple due to its inclusion of ‘Ways Tom Jones Would Dance With Your Mother,’ the ebook reader Eucalyptus is available to all people/assholes with an iPhone or iPod touch.

The interface is nice, the size of the text is scalable, and it gives you easy access to the 20,000+ book large Project Gutenberg. It’s not like it’ll make me any less thirsty for Tao Lin on a Kindle, but it’s fun to browse through so many nice books written by so many nice dead people.

If you have iTunes, you can check it out here.

Technology / 8 Comments
May 24th, 2009 / 5:00 pm

Members Only (that means you)

anniehoofd1

My name is Woody Allen. This is the opening scene from Annie Hall where I tell some of my morbid stand-up jokes. If you’re curious about what I said, many years later there will be this thing called youtube so you can check it out here. As for the tan brown color behind me, you’ll notice both my hair and jacket are brown, and I’m just that subtle. Anyways, check out my jokes, I’m really funny. I’m really looking forward to the future.

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Massive People / 9 Comments
May 24th, 2009 / 2:16 am

Literary Lessons from Metal Magazines: Goblin C*ck

This post is Not Safe For Work! Nor is it safe if you are a huge fan of Redbook Magazine. So, yeah. No need to read:

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Excerpts / 31 Comments
May 23rd, 2009 / 7:49 pm

hi speed wireless seeks loving relationship

1149357447396 READ MORE >

Technology / 29 Comments
May 23rd, 2009 / 5:00 pm

The Nation Spring Books Issue…

On the origin of awesome beards.

…is on stands now. I haven’t seen a hard copy yet, but if you click over to their website the top story is an essay by William Deresiewicz, for whose critical writing I expressed much love in a previous post. Here’s a meaty little excerpt from “Adaptation: On Literary Darwinism.”

Human beings expend an enormous amount of energy doing things that don’t seem to have any survival value: singing, dancing, painting caves, decorating spears and, above all, telling stories. (Think how much time you spend consuming fictional narratives–novels, movies, TV shows–in one form or another.) The nascent field of Darwinian aesthetics seeks to account for the art-making impulse in evolutionary psychological terms. If art is a product of the mind, and the mind is a product of evolution, then art is a product of evolution. Again, as an intellectual project, this is perfectly valid. But there are also strong selection pressures pushing in the direction of such an approach. Evolutionary thinking is, at present, an aggressively expansive species within the academic world, a kind of emergent Homo sapiens outcompeting the old-school Neanderthals across a wide swath of intellectual territory. Having colonized the social sciences–where it has begun to displace the view, predominant throughout the twentieth century, that the mind is a highly malleable product of culture–it has now set its sights on the humanities, the last area of resistance.

Author Spotlight / 8 Comments
May 23rd, 2009 / 1:29 pm

A cage went in search of a bird

February 23. Unwritten letter.


–Kafka, The Blue Octavo Notebooks (Fourth Notebook)

Excerpts / 10 Comments
May 22nd, 2009 / 6:05 pm